Book 'Em, Dano

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In Chapter 25 of THE HEISTERS, Chick pays a clandestine visit as a 'survey taker' to another one of Jackie Tempel's girlfriends to find out if she stole the gang's loot, but when he gets there, he's in for a rude surprise ...


EXT. BUNGALOW - NIGHT
An old Craftsman bungalow
divided into three tiny apartments.

Right down the street from where
Jackie Tempel got skewered.

Chick comes walking
down the sidewalk
holding his clipboard.

Reads the numbers on the houses.
Stops at the Craftsman.

CHICK
I love these old homes.
So much character.

He opens the gate.
Walks up the path
to the front door.

ACROSS THE STREET
Sitting in an unmarked car
are Homicide Detective Isaacs
and his partner Nunn
staking out the joint.

They both sip
designer coffees.

Isaacs sees Chick
across the street.

ISAACS
Looks like we got ourselves
another live one.

NUNN
Guy looks kinda old --

ISAACS
Keep in mind
these are heisters.
Some of the pros
keep working.
There’s no retirement age.

NUNN
Should we pop ‘em now,
or wait till
he comes out?

ISAACS
It’s fucking late.
Let’s go reel ‘em in.

NUNN
Book ‘em, Danno.

They start to get
out of the car.

AT THE DOOR
A young HOT BLONDE (20)
stands in the doorway.

Looks at Chick intently.
She’s in her bathrobe,
wearing glasses.

HOT BLONDE
Can I help you?

CHICK
I’m sorry to
bother you so late.
I’m with the
Global Media Group,
taking a survey.
It’ll only take a
couple of minutes.

HOT BLONDE
A survey?
What about?

CHICK
(smiles)
Your entertainment
viewing habits.
TV, the internet,
video games --

HOT BLONDE
(looks over his shoulder)
Well, I’m kinda busy --
studying for finals.
You said it will
only take a
couple minutes?

ISAACS (O.C.)
Thanks, Miss.
We’ll take it from here.

Chick turns around, sees --

ISAACS AND NUNN
Standing behind them.
Holding up their badges.

ISAACS
Detective Don Isaacs,
homicide.

NUNN
Would you please
come with us?
We’d like to ask you
some questions.

Chick looks at them, startled.
Like anyone would.

ISAACS
Strictly routine,
of course.

CHICK
Why certainly, officers.
Would you mind telling me
what this is all about?

The door CLICKS
closed behind him.

ISAACS
We’ll talk about it
at the station
if you don’t mind.

CHICK
No, of course not.
I support law enforcement.

NUNN
(to Isaacs)
Hey.
Check it out.
The old-timer just
pissed his pants.

Chick looks down.
Sees the wet stain
on his crotch.

ISAACS
Think he’s got
something to hide?

NUNN
Nah.
Probably just forgot
to wear his Depends.

They both BURST
into nasty LAUGHTER.