Friday, September 19, 2014

Stimulous Package


Hey there, crime kids. TGIF. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 15 of BLUE HOTEL, private school teacher Gil Sherry goes to a Venice Beach cash machine to get money to give to Alona Tal to help her get rid of the dead body in her hotel room, and gets mugged. Meanwhile, kinky Russian mobsters Vlad and Anya inspect the various acts of depravity at a new dungeon 'opening,' and then get ready to rob the joint ...


EXT. VENICE BEACH - WINDWARD AVENUE - NIGHT
A circular street two blocks
from the boardwalk.

A cream-colored Saab
pulls in front of the bank
across the street from
the Venice post office.

INT. SAAB - CONTINUOUS
Gill is behind the wheel.

He shuts off the engine.
Gets out.

AT THE CASH MACHINE
Gill slips his card in.
Punches his pin code.

The machine CHING-CHING-CHINGS,
and his cash slides out.

He grabs it.
Then feels something
in his back.

GRAVELLY MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Hand over the cash, asshole --
or I’ll fucking shoot.

GILL
Okay, okay --
please don’t hurt me.

He holds up the money.

A FIGURE IN BLACK (20’s),
hoodie pulled down,
SNATCHES it from his hand.

FIGURE IN BLACK
Now gimmee your keys.
Nice ride you got there --

GILL
Please, not my car.
I need that to --

Figure In Black CRACKS
him in the head with his gun.

Gill goes down, THUMP.
Figure KICKS him in the stomach.

GILL
OW!

FIGURE IN BLACK
Your KEYS, NOW --

Gill winces in pain.

Digs his keys out of his pocket.
Holds them up.

Figure SNATCHES THEM.
RUNS to the car.

FEMALE VOICE (O.C.)
Ohmigod, that guy just got MUGGED!

MALE VOICE (O.C.)
And they’re stealing his CAR!

Figure JUMPS IN.
Starts the engine.

ROARS away in a SCREECH
of rubber like a madman from hell.

A YOUNG COUPLE (17)
RACE OVER to Gill.

Trendy skateboard kids
with multi-colored hair,
piercings in baggies and sneakers.

SKATEBOARD CHICK
Hey, mister -- are you okay?

HIPSTER GUY
(pulls out his cell phone)
Don’t worry, I’m calling the cops.

Skateboard Chick helps Gill stand up.
He holds his stomach.
Hipster punches 911. Listens.

GILL
My car -- he got my CAR --

HIPSTER GUY
Yeah, hi -- so listen,
a dude was mugged, and they,
like, stole his car --
(listens)
On the Windward circle.
In front of the bank --
(listens, looks at Gill)
He looks okay to me --
(to Gill)
You okay?

PUSH IN ON Gill’s face.
More than upset.

GILL
Oh, I’m just peachy.
Top of the world, ma.

INT. CLUB FETISH - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
Nasty, filthy club music over --

A catacomb of perverted horrors
run amok.

A labyrinthine maze of cubicles,
each containing unspeakable
acts of depravity.

IN ONE STALL

A MAN (50’s) lies in a bathtub, naked.

A group of CLUB PATRONS
stand in a circle and pee on him.

IN ANOTHER STALL

A WOMAN (20’s) lies on a table.
Bound and gagged.

A GIANT DOM raise a cat ‘o nine tails,
CRACKS IT against her pale flesh.

IN THE DJ BOOTH

The DJ (30’s), hair scooped
into red devil horns,
nods to the music,
SNORTS a fat line of meth.

IN ANOTHER STALL

A MAN IN A DIAPER,
on his hands and knees,
licks the boots of a
GORGEOUS DOMINATRIX (40’s).

She JERKS his leash.
Laughing.

VLAD AND ANYA
Stroll through the Dionysian splendor
like gods. Regal.

Inspecting the display
of twisted desires.

ANYA
It is, how they say in New York,
‘bridge and tunnel.’

VLAD
Well, we ARE behind Orange Curtain.

They chuckle. Stop.
Watch the GIANT DOM at work.

ANYA
(shaking her head)
No finesse. No -- style.
Is like Gitmo. No imagination.

VLAD
That may be -- but Little Miss Muffet
will get welt on her tuffet,
and she will go home to
safe suburban hell
with naughty memory --

They continue walking.

ANYA
I see your point.
Is like MacDonald’s of dungeons.

Vlad stops.
Puts one hand on Anya’s breast.

The other on her throat.
Pushes her up against the wall.
Smiles, evil.

Anya swoons with pleasure.
Licks her lips.
Eyes flashing.

VLAD
Enough of field trip.
You ready to rock n’ rolla,
my dark goddess?

ANYA
Take me to cash machine, bab-ya.

She pulls out her gun.
Rubs it on his crotch.

He pulls out his.
Sticks it in her mouth.

VLAD
Is what I love about you.
(beat)
What I call -- stimulus package.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

A Stiff One


Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 14 of BLUE HOTEL, after hooker Alona Tal and private school teacher Gill Sherry make love, he discovers dead agent Oscar Goldman's body under her bed, and recoils when she asks him for money to pay the Russian mobsters to remove it for her. Meanwhile, wannabe writer Holly Land and the agent's assistant Feo flirt over cocktails, until Feo recognizes her from the TMZ video of her robbing a liquor store ...


INT. ALONA’S SHITTY HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Alona and Gill lie in her bed,
making love, Alona on top.

They both reach an earth-shattering orgasm.
Clench each other for dear life.

Stop. Silence.

Alona reaches for her smokes.
Lights one up.

Blows a lazy smoke ring.
Gill closes his eyes. Sighs.

GILL
You send me, my angel --
(opens them)
I think I hurt my back.
What you got under the bed?
A suitcase?

Alona picks up her cup of vodka.
Takes a big hit.

ALONA
That’s Oscar.

GILL
Oscar? I don’t -- understand.

ALONA
Another -- client.
(off his stare)
Earlier tonight, things got a little rough --
Holly thought I was in danger --
and she came in and --
(beat)
Stabbed him.

GILL
What the FUCK? There’s a --
(looks down)
Dead body under the bed?

ALONA
Surprise.

GILL
We have to call the police.

ALONA
No. No cops.

GILL
But what are you going to --

ALONA
GILL. Be quiet, listen to me.
Some people are on their way here to --
take care of it.
(beat)
Problem is, they’re expensive.
I need your help.

Pause.

GILL
H-how much?

ALONA
Five grand. We’ve got almost a third.
Beggar and Holly are out getting more --
don’t ask -- and I thought maybe --
(beat)
You could go to a cash machine?

GILL
Jesus Christ, Alona -- a DEAD BODY?

ALONA
You say you love me?
Now’s the time to prove it.
I need your help, Gill --

GILL
(head spinning)
Okay, okay -- yeah, sure -- I, I, --
(thinks)
But I can only take out
five-hundred at a time --

ALONA
Yeah, but that plus the three-hundred
you gave me makes a nice dent.

GILL
Can I stay here with you?
Until -- they get here?

ALONA
I’m not sure when Beggar’ll be back.
You know how he is.

Gill gets up.
Starts putting his jeans on.
Scared. Angry.

GILL
Yeah, I get it.
Beggars CAN be choosers --

INT. THE STARLIGHT LOUNGE - AT THAT MOMENT
The joint is deserted,
except for Holly and Feo,
with fresh cocktails.

The BARTENDER cleans glasses,
watches some old movie
on the TV above the bar.

HOLLY
That’s gotta be exciting,
working for an agent.

FEO
It was at first, but living on
four-hundred bucks a week gets old fast.

HOLLY
I’m writing a screenplay --

FEO
Everyone and their sister is --
(catches himself)
That’s -- great. What’s it about?

Feo’s smart phone RINGS.

FEO
Hold that thought.
(answers)
This is Feo --
(eyes wide)
Uh, not yet. He’s -- in a meeting.
(listens)
I know it’s late --
(beat)
I’ve got the script with me.
I’m gonna give it to him
as soon as he’s done.
(beat)
I’ll call you.
(CLICKS the phone shut)
Shit.

HOLLY
What’s wrong?

FEO
My boss is missing --
(low)
He was meeting a hooker at this hotel,
but no one’s seen him.
It’s like he -- disappeared.

Holly flinches.
Tries to act casual.

HOLLY
W-what’s he -- look like?
Maybe I’ve -- seen him.

FEO
He’s tall. Bald, with a big gut.
Goatee. Decent-looking.
(low)
And really kinky.
Into, you know -- rough stuff.

HOLLY
(averts her eyes)
I haven’t seen him. Sorry --

FEO
Yeah, well --
(sips his drink)
I’ve got this script Oscar’s
supposed to read tonight.
Scarlet Stone wants to star in it.
(beat)
I am SO fucked.

HOLLY
Oscar?

FEO
That’s his name -- Oscar.
Oscar Goldman.

She gulps her drink.
Freaking out.

HOLLY
Nice -- name.

FEO
What a weird night.
Oscar disappears,
then the robbery at the liquor store --
(beat)
And then I meet you.

He takes a sip of his drink.
Stares at her. A lightbulb POPS.

FEO
Wait a minute.
I thought you looked familiar --

UNDER THE BAR
Holly pulls the gun out of her purse.

HOLLY
Smiles strangely.

HOLLY
Familiar? How?

FEO
The video of the liquor store on AMZ --

HOLLY
JAMS the gun in his crotch. HARD.

FEO
Winces in pain.

FEO
OW. What the --

HOLLY
(sharp whisper)
It’s a gun.
And I’ll use it if you
don’t shut the fuck up.
Pay the bartender, and then
we’re going up to my room.

FEO
Please don’t shoot.
Can’t we -- talk about this?

PUSH IN ON Holly’s face.
Blinking back frightened tears.

HOLLY
(low, throaty)
Do what I say, or I’ll
blow your fucking nuts off.
I’ve already killed two people tonight,
I’m really drunk,
and I’m not in the fucking MOOD.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Holy Whips And Chains, Batman


Hey there, crime kids. Happy Hump Day. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 13 of BLUE HOTEL, kinky Russian mobsters Vlad and Anya arrive at the grand opening of a new dungeon with plans to rob the joint. Meanwhile, drug dealer Beggar Leck goes to a swinging, decadent rooftop Venice Beach party to meet with entertainment lawyer Lief Scott and sell him some coke ...


EXT. LONG BEACH DOCKS - WAREHOUSE - NIGHT
A shitty, old crumbling building
at the far end of the docks.

A cluster of expensive CARS
and LIMOS are parked in front.

A BLACK HUMMER pulls into a space.
Stops.

INT. HUMMER - CONTINUOUS
We see Vlad behind the wheel,
rakish in black leather and studs.

In the passenger seat is Anya,
resplendent in vinyl, rubber and
chrome against milky white flesh.

VLAD
Welcome to hell,
my little turtle-dove.

ANYA
Is new dungeon.
My heart is all a-flutter.

He pulls out a pair of black masks.
Hands her one.

They put them on.
Look at each other. Smile.

ANYA
Holy whips and chains, Batman.
(laughs)
I’m wet already.

Vlad pulls out a bottle of pills.
Flips it open with a thumbnail.

Chugs a fistful.
CRUNCHES them in his mouth.

Reaches under the seat.
Pulls out a sawed-off shotgun.

Anya opens the glove box.
Takes out a gleaming, chrome 44 Magnum.
They both CLICK the safeties.

VLAD
Ready to fuck perverts?

ANYA
Can we perhaps --
sample merchandise first?

VLAD
But of course.
Anything for my dark angel.

He takes her gloved hand.
Kisses it.

VLAD
You are a vision of unholy beauty.
A luscious flower in urban decay.

ANYA
Oh, Vlad.
Moonlight becomes you.
VLAD
I would die without you.
(raise his gun)
Let’s go rob kinky
motherfuckers blind.

Anya puts her hand on his gun barrel.
Strokes it.

ANYA
How you say -- Vlad the Impaler?

EXT. BEACHFRONT CONDO - NIGHT
The wind off the ocean WHIPS
the palm trees in front of --

A gleaming, silver three-story
single residence right on the sand.
Lights BLAZING.

We can see through the windows
that a party is raging.
Loud MUSIC blares.

EXT. BEACHFRONT CONDO - ROOF DECK - CONTINUOUS
Eerily lit by tiki torches.
Nasty, throbbing techno.

A giant four-poster bed
in the middle of the patio,
facing the ocean.

A gaggle of HARD-CORE PARTIERS,
a rough-looking crowd,
circle around it smoking, drinking.
And watching --

A COUPLE
On the bed.
Fucking their brains out.

The GUY (30’S) is LIEF SCOTT,
flabby ‘attorney to the stars,’
giving it really hard to
an EMACIATED STARLET (17),
who is SHRIEKING with abandon.

A giant MOUND OF COKE
Sits on a glass table nearby.

A SLUTTY CHICK
Scoops up a chunk on a
long, purple fingernail.
INHALES it.

SLUTTY CHICK
(rubs her nose)
Whoah, got a fucking ROCK.

BEGGAR
Appears in the doorway
to the roof with a beer.

He scans the crowd.
Shakes his head in disbelief.

BEGGAR
I’ve died and gone to
Kid Rock heaven.

He walks over to a pale,
meth-skinny GLAM ROCKER
checking his eye-makeup.
Taps him on the shoulder.

BEGGAR
Hey, Fall Out Boy --
you seen Lief?

Meth-Skinny turns and looks.
Grins a sickly smile. Points.

METH-SKINNY
Right there, on the Sit N’ Sleep.
(chuckles)
I mean, the fuck and suck.

Beggar looks at --

THE COUPLE
Rapidly approaching lift-off.

AN EMACIATED BIMBO
(20s), all legs, hair
and Dolce and Gabana,
sidles up to Beggar.

Points her cigar at him.
Nods at the bed, eyes gleaming,
swirling on Ecstacy.

EMACIATED BIMBO
Hallo, Mickey Roarke.
Vant to go next?

BEGGAR
(sips his beer)
No thanks, baby.
(looks her up and down)
Already took out the Eurotrash tonight --

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Kiss And Tell


Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 12 of BLUE HOTEL, private school teacher Gill Sherry tries to convince hooker Alona Tal to run away with him. Meanwhile, wannabe screenwriter Holly Land grabs her gun and head out into the night with a view to getting some money to help pay for removing the dead body in Alona's hotel room ...


INT. HOLLY’S SHITTY HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Holly walks in the room
carrying a bottle of vodka,
goes to her desk. Sits.

Pours two fingers.
Downs it.

Punches PLAY on her boombox.
The anguished, brittle, tortured sound of
Portishead oozes out the speakers
like a wound.

She opens her laptop.
Boots it up.
Looks at the screen.

ON THE MONITOR
We see the screenplay
she’s working on.

It reads:

INT. MOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Molly leans against the wall.
Listening to the sound of
love-making in the next room.

She reaches down.
Touches herself.

HOLLY
SLAPS the computer closed.

HOLLY
Fucking SHIT.

She pours another one. Downs it.
Stands. A bit wobbly.

HOLLY
Need to get -- more money.

Holly pours one more for courage.
Slugs it down.

Grabs her purse.
Pulls the gun from the robbery out.
Checks it.

HOLLY
Time to cut to the chase.

INT. BEGGAR’S BMW CONVERTIBLE - NIGHT
Beggars sits in his car
in the rear parking lot of the hotel.
Dials a number on his cell. Listens.

BEGGAR
Lief, hey -- it’s Beggar.
(beat)
I just got a kilo of
primo booger sugar,
and I thought of you --
(beat)
You having a party?
Well, that’s even better --
(beat)
You know I’m cool.
I won’t tell anyone --
(beat)
WHO?
(beat)
You’re shitting me.

INT. THE STARLIGHT LOUNGE - NIGHT
Some strange 60’s lounge classic plays
like Yma Sumac on the jukebox.

Alona and Gill sit at the bar
with cocktails.

ALONA
So what are you gonna do now?

GILL
Well, I still have my job --
(beat)
And I still have you.

ALONA
Gill, I’m with Beggar.
You know that.
You’re a friend.

GILL
I know to you I’m just a client,
but I can tell you feel something
when we make love.
I can feel it.

ALONA
My dear, sweet Gill --
the incurable romantic.

GILL
I wish you’d let me take you
away from all of this, Alona.
(gestures)
This place is a dive.
A cesspool --

The BARTENDER looks up.
Pissed off.

ALONA
Gill, I like my life
just the way it is.
No strings.
Nothing to tie me down.
If I get tired of it,
I can just split.
(beat)
And I like sex too much.

GILL
(finishes his drink)
Speaking of sex, let’s go upstairs.
I need to quench my thirst
from your heavenly fountain.

ALONA
Heavenly fountain?
(drains her drink)
Kitchen sink is more like it.

EXT. STARLIGHT HOTEL - NIGHT
Holly comes down the front steps.
Weaving a little.

She stops.
Looks around.

Sees a crowd of ONLOOKERS
in front of the
liquor store crime scene.

Feo, still sitting
on the park bench, sees Holly.

FEO
Hey, there.
(smiles)
We’ve got to stop meeting like this.

HOLLY
(sees him)
Oh. Hey.
(points at the crowd)
What’s -- going on?

FEO
Some chick knocked off the liquor store
with a couple of gang-bangers,
then shot one of ‘em.
(holds up I-phone)
Wanna see the footage?

She stares. He saw it?
But doesn’t recognize her?

HOLLY
(trying to be casual)
Sure.

Holly sits down.
He holds up the phone
in front of her.

ON THE SCREEN
We see grainy, black and white
footage of the robbery,
with Holly seen from the rear.

She SHOOTS the gang-banger.
BANG. He falls.

She grabs the liquor,
RUNS into the back.

HOLLY
Looks at Feo.

HOLLY
Huh. Looks kinda like me.

FEO
Nah. She looks vicious.
You’re kinda cute.

HOLLY
You really --
(hiccups)
Really think so?

FEO
Yeah. If I didn’t have a --
situation to take care of,
I’d ask you if I could
buy you a drink.

HOLLY
(points)
Hotel’s got a bar, right there.
Buy me a drink, we can talk about it?
(weird smile)
Maybe I can help.

FEO
You’re on.
(beat)
Don’t worry,
I don’t kiss and tell.

HOLLY
That’s a shame.
I do --

Monday, September 15, 2014

Dead Weight


Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 11 of BLUE HOTEL, drug dealer Beggar Leck, hooker with a heart of coal Alona Tal and wannabe writer Holly Land count their cash to see if they have enough to pay the Russian gangsters to get rid of the dead body in Alona's hotel room ... but when they find out Alona's trick Gill is on his way over, they realize they need to hide the body ...


EXT. STARLIGHT HOTEL - PARK BENCH - NIGHT
Feo sits on the bench.

Watching the commotion
at the crime scene.

Starts flipping through websites
on his smart phone.

FEO
(looks)
Maybe I can find something about it --
(stares)
Holy SHIT.

ON THE PHONE
We see the robbery at
Davey Jones’ Liquor Locker
unfolding in grainy black and white.

And there’s our plucky little killer,
Holly -- blowing gang-banger’s brains out.

FEO
Stares at the screen.

FEO
I just SAW her somewhere.

Gill walks up to the bench
carrying a suitcase.

Gestures toward the news vans,
the cops, the onlookers.

GILL
What’s going on over there?

FEO
Liquor store holdup.

GILL
Why all the media?

FEO
Three people were killed.
Tworobbers and the clerk.
(looks at the screen)
What I can’t figure out
is how the girl was involved.

These guys were serious gang-bangers,
and she looks like Tori Amos.

INT. ALONA’S SHITTY HOTEL ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
Beggar shuts off his phone.

Looks at Alona and Holly,
sitting on the bed together.
Sipping vodka in their plastic cups.

BEGGAR
It’s all set.
Vlad’ll be here at five AM.
Problem is, he wants
five grand to take care of it.

ALONA
FIVE THOUSAND?
We don’t have that kind of scratch.

BEGGAR
How much do you have?

ALONA
I’ve got a couple hundred saved,
but that’s for an emergency.

BEGGAR
What the fuck do you think THIS is?

ALONA
Alright, alright.
Don’t get your speedo in a bind.

She gets up goes to the desk.
Opens up a drawer.

Takes out a book. Opens it.
We see it’s hollowed-out.

She pulls out a wad of cash.
Starts counting it.

BEGGAR
(to Holly)
What about you?
How much do you have?

HOLLY
I don’t know -- about fifty bucks?
I don’t get paid at the book store
until day after tomorrow --

BEGGAR
Well, you better figure out
how to get more, because YOU
got us into this mess.

Alona finishes counting.
SLAPS the money in Beggar’s hand.

ALONA
Three hundred and twenty-six bucks, bucko.
Don’t spend it all in one place.

BEGGAR
Okay, so with Gidget’s fifty bucks,
we’re close to four hundred --

He takes out his wallet.
Counts his money.

BEGGAR
I’ve got hundred and ten --
(grins)
Wait a minute.
I’m freaking out, I’m not thinking.
I just got a bag of blow to sell.
I’ll make some calls --
(thinks)
Yeah. There’s that yuppie lawyer
asshole in Santa Monica --
(looks at Holly)
And if Gidget here can dig up some more,
we might be okay.

HOLLY
How am I supposed to get more money?

ALONA
Lay off her, Beggar.
She’s just a kid.
I can turn a couple of tricks --

A soft KNOCK-KNOCK-KNOCK at the door.
They all look at each other, scared.

GILL (O.C.)
Alona? Are you in there?
It’s me, Gill. Donna kicked me out --

ALONA
(whispers)
What the fuck?
(goes to the door)
Right now’s not a good time, Gill.
I’m kinda busy.

BEGGAR
(whispers)
Gill? The teacher? The trick?
(off her nod)
Tell him to meet you in the bar,
we’ll get outta here,
and you can do him.

GILL (O.C.)
Alona?

ALONA
I have company, Gill.
Beggar’s here.
Meet me downstairs in the bar
in a couple minutes, okay?

GILL (O.C.)
Okay, okay -- thank you, my love.
I’ll see you down in the bar.

BEGGAR
(looks at Holly)
Okay, we’re outta here.

HOLLY
What about --
(points at the body)
Him?

BEGGAR
Shit.
(thinks)
Under the bed.
(to Alona)
C’mon, help me.

ALONA
Over my dead --
(beat)
Okay.

Beggar and Alona each take an end
of Oscar’s body.
Start to slide it toward the bed.

ALONA
He’s so -- stiff.

BEGGAR
Why do you think they call it
a fucking STIFF?

They start to push him under the bed,
but his stomach’s too big.
Doesn’t quite fit.

ALONA
Shit.

BEGGAR
C’mon, PUSH.

Beggar and Alona put their hands
on his side, and PUSH.

It doesn’t move.

BEGGAR
HARDER.

They PUSH again. Nothing.

HOLLY
Let me try.

ALONA
You fucking kidding me?

BEGGAR
(stands back)
Be my guest.

Holly takes a few steps back,
races toward the body,
and KICKS it with animal strength.
It POPS under the bed, THWUNK.

ALONA
Holy shit.

BEGGAR
How did you --

HOLLY
(faint smile)
Used to play soccer.

Alona pulls the bedspread down, hiding it.

ALONA
Okay, you guys split.
Time for me to get in character.

BEGGAR
Oh, yeah? What character?

PUSH IN ON Alona.
Resigned to her fate.

ALONA
Used to be Lady Madonna.
(beat)
Now it’s Lady Macbeth --

Friday, September 12, 2014

The Human Remains Of The Day


Hey there, crime kids. Thank god it's Friday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 10 of BLUE HOTEL, drug dealer Beggar Leck gets a return call from crime boss Vlad Vlaovic about getting help with removing the dead body from hooker Alona Tal's dive hotel room, but flips out when Vlad tells him that not only will it cost him 5k, but then he'll also become 'part of the family' ...


INT. ALONA’S SHITTY HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Alona and Holly sit on the bed,
drinking vodka from plastic cups.

Beggar looks out the window
at the action outside.

Takes hits of a joint.
Passes it to Alona.

ALONA
(takes it)
Thanks --

HOLLY
It seemed to happen
in slow motion --

ALONA
(takes a hit)
Fucking unreal.

HOLLY
It all happened so fast.
There was no time to think.

BEGGAR
(turns, looks)
Our little girl’s good
with knives AND guns --

Beggar’s phone RINGS.
He pulls it out.
Answers it.

BEGGAR
About fucking time --
(listens)
Vlad, hey.
Yeah, it’s urgent.
We’ve got a -- a situation here.
We need your help.
(listens)
There was a -- an accident.
Someone was killed.
We need help getting
rid of the body.
(listens)
Yeah.
The Starlight Hotel,
right on the boardwalk.
(listens)
What do you mean
it’s on the news?
Nobody knows about it --
(realizes)
That’s something else.
Somebody jacked the
corner liquor store --
(listens)
Well, yeah --
there’s cops around.
But they’ll go away.
(listens)
In the morning? But --
(listens)
FIVE GRAND?

INTERCUT WITH:

INT. SLEAZY APARTMENT - NIGHT
Vlad sits on an overstuffed sofa
in his opium den of a joint.

Smoking a cigarette.
Talking on his phone.

VLAD
Did you think we would
provide service for FREE?

BEGGAR
Well, since you put it that way --

VLAD
And you do realize we will
ask you to return the favor?
That you will become
part of family?

BEGGAR
Yeah.
Of course.

VLAD
Good.
We’ll be there at five AM.
Before sunrise.

BEGGAR
Okay.
Thanks.

VLAD
No.
Thank you --

He hangs up.
Pours a shot of vodka.

DOWNS it.
Calls out.

VLAD
Anya, I have news.

ANYA (O.C.)
Oh, yeah?
What is news?

ANYA TURGENEV (20’s)
walks into the room.

Hot. Cold. Curvy.
Raven-haired.

Blood red lips.
Former stripper.

Miles of milk white legs.
Serpent tattoo near the hemline.

Ouch.

VLAD
Road trip.

ANYA
Ooh. Goody. Where to?

VLAD
Venice Beach, baby.

ANYA
What is job?

VLAD
Disposal of -- human remains.

ANYA
Ahhhhh.
You know how to
make girl happy.

VLAD
Come to Poppa, my kinky one.

She does.
Crawls into his lap.
He strokes her hair.

ANYA
(sings softly)
'They asked me how I knew,
my true love was true -- '

VLAD
(sings)
'I of course replied,
when a true love dies -- '

ANYA
'Blood gets in your eyes.'
They stare at each other. Then ERUPT with mad laughter.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

From Brassiere To Eternity


Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 9 of BLUE HOTEL, wannabe writer Holly Land returns to hooker Alona Tal's dive hotel room on the Venice boardwalk after the liquor store robbery with vodka splattered with blood. Meanwhile, private school teacher Gill Sherry's wife Donna discovers he cheated on her with Alona, and throws him out of the house.


INT. ALONA’S SHITTY HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Alona sits on the bed.
Beggar paces the room.

CLICKS his cell phone
shut with disgust.

BEGGAR
Fucking Russian bastard --

A soft KNOCK-KNOCK-KNOCK
at the door.

ALONA
Holly?

HOLLY (O.S.)
Yeah.

Beggar goes to the door. Opens it.
Holly comes in carrying her box.

Stares at them.
Looking spooked.

ALONA
Holly?
What’s wrong?

Holly goes to the bed. Sits.
Puts down the box. Stares.

HOLLY
There was -- a robbery.

Alona opens the box.
Looks inside.

Takes out the vodka bottles.
Sees that they’re blood-splattered.

ALONA
What the hell HAPPENED?

BEGGAR
What did you DO?

Holly takes out
a bottle of vodka.
Unscrews the cap.

Takes a long drink.
Sighs. Wipes her mouth.

HOLLY
I went to the liquor store --
a-and these gang-bangers
robbed it --
(another drink)
And they, and they --

She breaks down. Sobbing.
Alona takes her in her arms.

Comforts her.
Strokes her hair.

ALONA
There, there.
It’s okay.

A siren WHOOP-WHOOPS outside.
Beggar goes to the window.
Opens it. Looks out.

BEGGAR
Holy fucking shit.
It’s like an episode of COPS
out there --

INT. GILL’S BUNGALOW - BATHROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
A cloud of steam swirls
around the bathroom.

Behind the rippled
glass of the door,
we see a MALE FIGURE.

IN THE SHOWER
Gill is soaping
and scrubbing himself.

His face stuck under
the hot spray of water.
Eyes closed.

GILL
(sings, ala My Sharona)
'M-m-m-my Alona --- '

Soapy hands reach down.
Massaging his manhood.
He smiles.

GILL
'Never gonna give it up,
never gonna stop,
such a dirty mind -- '

His body JERKS.

GILL
'Ooh, you make my
motor run, motor run -- '

DONNA (O.C.)
GILL!
Get THE FUCK out
of the shower RIGHT NOW!

Gill’s eyes FLY OPEN.
He stops jerking off.
What the fuck?

He turns off the water.
Opens the shower door.

DONNA
Stands in the bathroom doorway.
Eyes blazing.

GILL
What’s wrong?
Jesus Christ, you scared
the fucking shit out of me.

He grabs a towel.
Wraps it around his waist.

DONNA
I called Sheila,
Brub’s wife --

GILL
What?

DONNA
(hisses)
You didn’t have
drinks with him.
He’s HOME SICK.

GILL
Did I say Brub?
I mean Bob --

She holds up a pair
of his underwear.

DONNA
And I found these
in the hamper.
They're ENCRUSTED
with COME STAINS.

GILL
Donna, I can EXPLAIN --

DONNA
Bull-fucking SHIT.
You’ve been fucking
CHEATING ON ME AGAIN,
and I want you OUT OF
MY FUCKING HOUSE -- NOW!

GILL
Wait, can’t we talk about this?

DONNA
(screams)
What the FUCK is
there to TALK ABOUT?
You’re screwing ANOTHER WOMAN,
AGAIN.
(hisses)
If it’s one of
your fucking students,
I swear I’m gonna
call the cops myself.
(STOMPS her foot)
Get the FUCK out of
my house, NOW.

GILL
But --

Donna GRABS a bottle of shampoo.
THROWS it at him.
It HITS him in the chest, THWAP.

DONNA
GET OUT! NOW!

GILL
Okay, ALRIGHT.
(eyes tearing up)
No need for you get violent --