Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Divine Sisters Of The Vagina Ya-Ya Hood
Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.
In Chapter 2 of B-GIRLS, stripper Lexus Cole, hooker Bling Stevens and porn star Neena Jammer arrive at Friendbook founder Randy Mandletort's 'private party' at his mansion in the Hollywood Hills ... and discover he really is a flaming asshole ...
EXT. HOLLYWOOD HILLS MANSION - DUSK
A big, sprawling joint high up in the hills.
Amazing view of the smog.
A giant circular driveway.
Deluxe and delightful.
A canary-yellow AUDI CONVERTIBLE
cruises down the driveway,
SCREECHES to a halt in front of the house.
Lexus gets out,
holding her smart phone to her ear.
Looks smoking hot
in a dress that’s barely there.
Suddenly a candy-apple red
AUDI CONVERTIBLE ROARS down the driveway.
CRUNCHES to a stop right next to Lexus.’
Leena hops out, also dressed to kill.
Check out Danica Patrick.
Nascar a go-go.
A bright blue AUDI CONVERTIBLE
FLIES across the gravel, FISHTAILS.
Makes a perfect stop next to Neena’s car.
Bling gets out, regal in black.
Flashes a big grin.
Divine sisters of the vagina ya ya hood.
INT. HOLLYWOOD HILLS MANSION - FOYER - DUSK
Bigger than most apartments.
The girls look around in wonder.
A BRITISH BUTLER (60’s) approaches them.
Mr. Mandletort is expecting you.
Please follow me.
INT. MANSION - LIVING ROOM - DUSK
Once again, very large, very lux.
Expensive furniture and art.
A full wet bar against one wall.
At the bar is RANDY MANDLETORT (27),
Makes Mark Zuckerburg look good-looking.
Wears an outrageous gold lame suit and shades.
The girls walk in.
Stop and stare.
So glad you could join me.
Come on in, the drinks are wet.
(a dirty chuckle)
Sure hope you are.
(low, to the girls)
Where’s everybody else?
I thought this was a party.
(under her breath)
Haven’t you seen Sunset Boulevard?
They plaster on fake smiles.
Thanks for inviting us.
Love your place.
Yeah. It’s -- big.
That’s not all that’s big.
If you know what I mean.
Ah, yes. The money. Silly me.
(presses the intercom)
Edgar, could you please
bring me the ladies’ gifts?
Right away, sir.
He’ll just be a sec.
So, you gals ever
played anal ring toss?
You know what?
I’d kill for a smoke.
Mind if I step out
on the terrace for a sec?
I’ll join you.
Take your time.
I’ll be right here.