The Natives Are Restless

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 34 of HIT & RUN HOLIDAY, just as fugitive screenwriter Friday Foster gets her apology live on TV from the film studio executives she's holding hostage at gunpoint, the cops arrive and demand that she give herself up ... but then get interrupted by a full-blown race riot in the streets ...

INT. WHITE LINE PICTURES - CONFERENCE ROOM - Dy
A DEEP, MALE VOICE BOOMS
over a loudspeaker from outside.

DEEP, MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Friday Foster!
This is the police!
We have you surrounded!
Come out with your hands up,
and you won’t be hurt!

FRIDAY
Damn. They really say that?

DEEP, MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Friday Foster, I REPEAT!
Come out RIGHT NOW,
hands on top of your head --
or we’re COMING IN AFTER YOU!

Silence. Worried looks all around.

FRIDAY
Who’s gotta cell phone I can use?

Everyone pulls theirs out.
Offers them.

FRIDAY
My god.
Reach out and touch me.

She takes Jimmy Joe’s.
Fingers a number --

FRIDAY
Hello? 911?
(listens)
Yeah, can you put me through
to the cop who’s outside
White Line Pictures
yelling over a bullhorn?
(listens)
I’m the one in the building
with a semi-automatic weapon
and a 357 Magnum that he’s yelling at --

EXT. WHITE LINE PICTURES - FRONT ENTRANCE - DAY
AN OLD, BLACK POLICE SERGEANT
holds a cell phone to his ear.

OLD BLACK POLICE SERGEANT
Hello? Ms. Foster?

SPLIT SCREEN WITH:
Friday pulls open the blinds.
Looks out the window.

FRIDAY
Hey, it’s me. Call me Friday.
What’s the 411, homes?
Can I get a shout-out?

OLD BLACK POLICE SERGEANT
(to himself)
I’m too old for this shit.
(into the phone)
We’ve got a situation here -- Friday.

FRIDAY
Understatement much?

OLD BLACK POLICE SERGEANT
So what are we going to do about it?
Are you going to come out and
surrender like a good citizen?

FRIDAY
I get it --
you’re the Morgan Freeman character,
the voice of affirmative action reason.
Cliched, but it still works.
When done well.

OLD BLACK POLICE SERGEANT
'Morgan Freeman character?'
(hears something)
Wait a minute.
I’ve got another call coming in --
(presses call-waiting)
Ridikuluss has been assassinated?
By WHITE COPS?

A large BOOM outside.
Friday looks, sees --

A MOB of marauding RIOTERS
swarm the street.

100% ‘of color,’
they SMASH AND GRAB goods from stores.
SHOOT GUNS in the air. Light FIRES.

WHOOP and HOLLER.
It’s scary. Out of a movie.

Oh. Wait a minute.

FRIDAY
It’s Rodney King time all over again.

Everybody crowds around the window.
Looks.

CARRIE
The natives are restless.

JIMMY JOE
They’re keepin’ it real,
up in the stolen TV.

OLD BLACK POLICE SERGEANT
(on the phone)
But we’ve got a hostage situation here.
I can’t just leave and --
(hears something, looks)
Holy shit. I see ‘em. Alright, goddamit.
(hits call waiting)
This is your lucky day, lady.
Stay in the building where you’re safe.
We’ll come back and get ya later.
(beat)
Hello? Friday? Ms. Foster?
(shuts off phone)
Friday. What hippie-ass
shit kinda name is that?

INT. WHITE LINE PICTURES - CONFERENCE ROOM - CONTINUOUS
Everyone watches the big-screen TV.
On it --

A RED-FACED ANCHOR
glares into the CAMERA.

Twitching with anger.
Self-righteousness.
Right-wing bravado.

RED-FACED ANCHOR
-- while leaving the downtown courthouse
after appearing for an arraignment on a
weapons product-placement parole violation,
hip-hop artist Ridikuluss was assassinated
in cold blood in broad daylight
by rogue police officers.
(beat)
Unfortunately, rival news channel
Crime TV was on the scene,
and aired footage of
the shooting moments later.

REBECCA
Go, team. GREAT footage.

CARRIE
But they’re not cops.

JIMMY JOE
How kin ya tell?

CARRIE
The swastika tattoo on the neck?
Dead giveaway.

RED-FACE
shakes his head.

RED-FACED ANCHOR
Mayor York has declared martial law,
an immediate curfew, and is
suspending all valet parking in the city.

JIMMY JOE
Damn.

Rebecca goes to Carrie.
Takes the camera.

REBECCA
Okay, that’s it. Gotta jam.
Bigger, better story, folks.
(shouts)
Howard! Scott!
Get your lazy asses in here!

FRIDAY
You can’t just -- leave --

REBECCA
Oh, yes I can.
You got your apology.
Story over. Nice little piece,
but no shoot-out with the cops,
no suicide, no mayhem.
Let’s face it, your ‘siege’
had a lame ending.

Howard and Scott appear in the doorway.

REBECCA (CONT’D)
Come on, fellas.
We gotta riot on our hands.
Move it, move it, move it.

They race over,
grab their equipment.

FRIDAY
'Lame ending?' LAME ENDING?

REBECCA
Don’t take it personally, hon.
I mean, think about it, you’re alive.

She goes to the door.
The crew follows. Then Kelly.

CARRIE
Where are you going?

KELLY
Life-changing epiphany.
(to Howard)
Coffee, later?

HOWARD
How do you take it?

KELLY
Uh -- black?

They leave.
Friday goes to the window.
Looks at the carnage.

FRIDAY
Jesus fucking Christ.
How am I gonna get outta here?