Hollywood Or Bust

Happy Friday, crime slicksters! It's time once again to take a trip to the lower depths of humanity. A place so dark, so depraved, that you might not get out ... of That Killing Feeling.

In today's chapter from your favorite spy thriller NOWHERE GIRLS, Homeland Security agents Cherry Nation and April Street are on the lam in their mobile safe house, being pursed by black ops assassin The Bagger, and his trusty assistant, 'Lemon' ...


INT. SERGE’S MOTOR HOME - NIGHT
Serge gets behind the wheel.
April slides into the passenger seat.
Cherry stands behind them.

APRIL
So where we gonna go?

SERGE
(shrugs)
Hollywood. The area code is three-two-three.
Then we work on decrypting her location.

CHERRY
(pushes out her chest)
Hollywood or BUST.

APRIL
Wait a minute.
I just had an idea.
I could call my ex --

CHERRY
What ex? You haven’t told me about him.

APRIL
No, I -- broke his heart.
(sighs)
It’s a long story. He’s black ops, NSA.
We were always on opposite ends of the world.
It was great, but I only got to see him
a couple times a year, if that,
and it just kinda -- tapered off.

CHERRY
But I thought absence makes the heart grow fonder.

APRIL
If you live in Kansas, maybe.
But not when you’re in deep cover
with a terrorist cell in Budapest --

OUTSIDE THE RV
The Bagger and Lemon approach the back of the vehicle.
But it start MOVING.

LEMON
Shit, it’s MOVING.

BAGGER
Quick, catch up with it.
Climb up on the roof.
I’ll follow in the car.

LEMON
Okay --

She DASHES OFF after it.
GRABS onto the steel rungs on the back.
Starts climbing up.
Stops, turns, blows Bagger a kiss.

The Bagger looks.
Starts quickly walking toward the SUV.

BAGGER
What a doll. Just how I like ‘em.
Fast, cheap and out of control.

EXT. BIBI’S SAFE HOUSE - CRIME SCENE - AT THAT MOMENT
Sunday and Max walk up to a PANEL TRUCK.
Sunday knocks on the window.
The side door OPENS. They peer in.

MAX
You get the location yet?

IN THE TRUCK
A pair of SURVEILLANCE TECHS turn and look at them.

BALD, INTENSE TECH
Yeah, we did, but --

HORN-RIMMED GLASSES TECH
We lost the signal.

BALD, INTENSE TECH
They realized we could track them --

HORN-RIMMED GLASSES TECH
And then destroyed the phone.

BALD, INTENSE TECH
They were in Venice Beach.
But they’re probably now in transit --

HORN-RIMMED GLASSES TECH
They were in a parking lot --

BALD, INTENSE TECH
Inside a hippie motor home --

HORN-RIMMED GLASSES TECH
Painted all crazy, you know, like the Partridge Family.

BALD, INTENSE TECH
(sings, monotone)
'I think I love you, so what am I so afraid of?'

HORN-RIMMED GLASSES TECH
Great karaoke number.

The techs look at each other.
Nod. Sip their coffee.

SUNDAY
You two should take your act on the road.

HORN-RIMMED GLASSES TECH
Oh, gosh, no. Strictly against regulations.

BALD, INTENSE TECH
(to Horn-Rimmed)
Are you sure about that?

MAX
ENOUGH. Just gimme the address.

Bald, Intense scribbles on a scrap of paper.
Hands it over. Max SNATCHES it out his hand.

MAX
You two outta get out more often.