The Thriller From Wasilla

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In Chapter 35 of FILLMORE, Slim gets a singing gig in Alaska, so he persuades his friend Sammy to drive up there with him, but when they arrive there, people mistake his friend for Sammy Davis, Jr., which causes more than a few problems ...


INT. PENNY’S COFFEE SHOP - DAY
Slim sits at the table in the window with Sammy.

SAMMY
You got a gig in ALASKA?
How’d you swing that?

SLIM
Woman that owns the club
called me outta the blue.
Said she wanted me to come up
for a couple weeks and play.
Got lots of paying customers
that want to hear some music.

SAMMY
The pipeline workers.
I hear they fucking clean up.

SLIM
Yeah. And there ain’t women for MILES around.
Must be horny motherfuckers.

SAMMY
Damn. I’d like to go.
Ain’t never been to Alaska.
I hear it’s like the Wild West up there.

SLIM
Well, I need help drivin.’

SAMMY
Drivin’ what?

SLIM
Big-ass recreational vehicle.

EXT. CANADIAN FREEWAY - DAY
A giant RECREATIONAL VEHICLE tools
down the freeway pulling a red Barracuda.
It’s not brand-new, but still very cool.

INT. RECREATIONAL VEHICLE - DAY
Blues music on the deluxe car stereo over --

Sammy, behind the wheel.
Sitting next to him is KELLY (20’S) one of his girls,
a petite white blonde chick with giant boobs.

Sitting behind her is LAURA (20’s),
the red-haired model.

Slim sits behind them in the lounge area
with Honey and SUZY (18) another white girl,
dark-haired in spandex.

Slim lights up a joint.
Takes a big hit. Passes it along.

SLIM
Now this is ridin’ in style.

SAMMY
(over his shoulder)
I’m so high up, it’s like driving a bus.

SLIM
I’m so high up, I’m high.

The bus starts slowing down.
STEAM comes out from the hood.

SLIM (CONT'D)
What’s going on?

SAMMY
Engine overheated or somethin.’

SLIM
(looks out the window)
Pull into that gas station.

EXT. GAS STATION - DAY
The RV pulls into a roadside service station.
Parks in front of the pumps.
Everyone piles out.

Kelly and Laura walk over towards the office.
The OWNER (40’s), a grease-stained white guy
with a big gut comes out.

GREASY GAS STATION OWNER
Afternoon, boys.
(looks at the RV)
Looks like she got overheated.

SLIM
Yes, sir.
We were hoping you could help us out.
We gotta be somewhere soon.

GREASY GAS STATION OWNER
Let’s take a look.

He goes to the hood. Opens it.
Root around inside. Nods.

GREASY GAS STATION OWNER (CONT’D)
(over his shoulder)
Radiator’s cracked. Need a new one.
And maybe a thermostat.

Greasy walks back over to Slim and Sammy.

SLIM
Can you fix it?

GREASY GAS STATION OWNER
Yeah, sure. Just gotta replace it.
Just gotta make a call.
(eyes Sammy)
Can I talk to you for a sec?
(pulls Slim aside)
I know that’s Sammy Davis, Jr.,
and I respect his privacy --
but I was wondering if he’d
take a picture with my family.
We’re all big fans,
and it would mean a lot to me.
And I work a lot faster when I’m happy.
(big smile)
The Candy Man is the wife’s favorite song.

SLIM
I’m sure he’d be delighted.

EXT. SMALL TOWN MEETING HALL - NIGHT
A small building where the
local townsfolk hang out.
Looks kinda like a lodge,
with that log-cabin type feel.

INT. SMALL TOWN MEETING HALL - NIGHT
A big space with folding tables
and a stage at the end.

A long bar is off to the side.
The joint is packed with LOCALS.

Slim and Sammy stand near the stage
with the girls and Greasy.

They all sip drinks in big plastic cups.
People stand in line to meet ‘Sammy Davis, Jr.’

SAMMY
(whispers to Slim)
You said it was just a PICTURE.

A down-home FARMER (40’s) and his
PLUMP WIFE (40’s) come up to Sammy.

Down-home takes Sammy’s hand.
PUMPS it furiously.

DOWN-HOME FARMER
Sammy Davis, Jr., I declare.
Shore is a pleasure to meet ya.
(nods at his wife)
The missus is a big fan.
Well, HA -- so am I.
Shore is great to meet ya.

A photographer moves in.
They pose, Down-Home and Plump grin wildly.

He SNAPS a picture.
Sammy’s eyes glaze over.

SAMMY
(to Slim)
Simms, please get me another cocktail.
I’m quite thirsty, my good man.

Slim shoots him a look.
Shakes his head.

Goes off to get his drink.
Sammy looks at Kelly and Laura.

SAMMY (CONT’D)
Would you ladies go find me
something to nibble on?
I’m quite famished.
(off their look)
Look alive. MOVE it --

They exchange glances.
Make a face. Walk away.

Slim returns with Sammy’s drink.
Hands it to him. Sammy takes it, nods.

SAMMY (CONT’D)
Thank you, Simms.
(to Greasy)
Good help is hard to find.

GREASY GAS STATION OWNER
Found a new radiator --
a couple hundred miles away.
(off their looks)
Friend of mine’s got an RV just like it.
I COULD replace it with his --
(off Slim’s stare)
So I was wondering --
(looks at Sammy)
Would you mind singing us a song?

SLIM
Oh, yeah, sure.
He wouldn’t mind at all.

PUSH IN ON Sammy’s face.
Freaking out.