Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.
In Chapter 19 of NOWHERE GIRL, stripper with a suitcase nuke Cherry Nation and her band of misfits get ambushed in a hail of gunfire by assassin Wendon Swift, and just as it looks like all is lost, Cherry's ex, CIA agent Shag Holliday arrives on the scene to save the day ...
INT. HUMMER - MOVING - NIGHT
A BRUNETTE (20’s) in shades and
black leather is behind the wheel.
Hair back in a sleek ponytail.
Meet WENDON SWIFT, gorgeous,
curvy killing machine.
And Sledge’s new hire.
WENDON
(on her cell)
I’m almost there.
(listens)
Not to worry.
I always deliver.
(listens)
Thirty minutes or less?
You flirt. BAD boy.
INT. INTELLIGENCE OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
Crafton hangs up.
Raises his cocktail in a toast.
SLEDGE
I always deliver.
(beat)
I think I’m in love.
And he downs it.
EXT. HOLLYWOOD HILLS - RANCH HOUSE - BACK YARD - NIGHT
Brody leads Cherry, Peeler and Stan
through the back yard.
They walk into a wooded area
behind the house.
A light RAIN starts falling.
CHERRY
Great.
Now it’s fucking RAINING.
She pulls her hoodie up over her head.
Her Blackberry VIBRATES in her pocket.
pulls it out.
THE SCREEN READS
Reminder: Take your meds.
A finger presses a button.
The LCD reads ERASE.
BRODY
turns his head.
Looks at Cherry.
BRODY
Can I ask you something?
CHERRY
What.
BRODY
If, let’s say, somebody
wanted to get into porn --
CHERRY
(looks at him)
YOU?
Are you fucking kidding me?
BRODY
What.
I’m not THAT bad-looking.
CHERRY
No, it’s just that --
BRODY
I’ve got eleven inches.
CHERRY
You DO?
PEELER
Wow. Shit.
STAN
What, you didn’t notice?
(off their stares)
So I’m gay.
Big fucking deal.
It’s 2014.
Deal with it.
GUNSHOTS SPRAY at them.
Stan GETS HIT in the chest.
Brody gets one in the leg.
So does Peeler.
Cherry’s arm is grazed.
They hit the ground.
Start crawling into the bushes.
BRODY
I’ve been SHOT.
Bullets WHIZ through the bushes.
Cherry gets behind a tree.
Pulls out her gun.
CHERRY
FUCK. I don’t see anyone.
(to Peeler)
Peeler, are you okay?
Peeler peers out
behind a row of bushes.
PEELER
I got shot in the leg,
but I’m okay.
But I think Stan is dead.
(sees her arm)
Cherry!
CHERRY
It’s okay.
It just grazed me.
BRODY
My leg -- is fucking fucked.
He tries to get up into
crawling position.
CHERRY
STAY DOWN.
But he doesn’t listen.
Sits up.
BRODY
I’m getting the fuck outta --
His head EXPLODES in a red mist.
PEELER
Ohmigod, we’re gonna DIE,
we’re gonna DIE!
CHERRY
STAY DOWN!
EXT. GARAGE ROOF - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
Wendon kneels on the tiles.
Cradling a sniperscope rifle.
She JAMS a new magazine in, KA-CHINK.
Takes aim. Sneers.
WENDON
Dick Cheney eat your
fucking heart out.
Hands suddenly GRAB
her by the neck. She GAGS.
Gets pulled back.
Her rifle CLATTERS onto the tiles.
Wendon GRABS the hands,
and viciously YANKS them off.
She WHIRLS around and faces --
SHAG. Aiming a Sig Sauer at her.
SHAG
Hands in the air!
I’m a federal agent!
Wendon smiles.
Raises her hands.
WENDON
So am I, asshole.
SHAG
Get on your knees. NOW.
She arches an eyebrow.
Then WHIRLS like a top and
KICKS Shag in the face -- CRACK.
He FLIES BACKWARDS -- OOF.
She LEAPS into the air
and lands on top of him, THWUMP.
He GRABS her by the waist,
and they ROLL across the tiles --
FLY off the edge of the roof,
and BANG into a dumpster.
IN THE WOODS
Cherry puts down her gun.
Looks at Peeler.
CHERRY
They stopped shooting.
How’s your leg?
Can you walk?
He gets up.
Puts his weight on it.
PEELER
Yeah. But it really hurts.
Cherry takes off her jacket.
RIPS off one of the arms.
Then the other.
Ties them together.
Then wraps it around
the wound, pulls it TIGHT.
Puts the armless jacket back on.
CHERRY
There.
That should hold it for awhile.
C’mon, let’s get the fuck outta here.
PEELER
Where did you learn how to do that?
CHERRY
Hey, just because
I take my clothes off
for a living doesn’t mean
I wasn’t a Girl Scout --
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