Monday, January 10, 2011

Boom, Boom, Boom, Out Go The Lights



Hey there, crime kids. Happy fucking MONDAY. Do you know what time it is? It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 25 of NOWHERE GIRLS, evil criminal mastermind Honey Almond, deep in her underground lair, chews out her aide de camp Rock Vargas after covert ops Cherry Nation and April Street have taken out her latest assassins. Meanwhile, deep below Macy's department store, Cherry and April are making their escape from the FBI when they get a surprise phone call from Rock, who now wants to defect ...


EXT. MACY’S DEPARTMENT STORE - NIGHT
The joint has become a mob scene of FBI,
local COPS, a SWAT TEAM and MEDIA.

NEWS VANS crowd for position behind barricades.
It’s a three-ring circus.

Sunday and Max lean against their SUV.
Watch the commotion.

MAX
Look. TMZ just got here.

SUNDAY
Fucking retards. Don’t they realize
they could comprise the operation?

MAX
People eat this shit up.
They’ll watch it for hours.
(looks at her)
You realize that if we capture them,
we’re gonna be celebrities?

SUNDAY
Really? You think so?
(thinks)
Damn. Think of all the snatch
I’d be able to get --

MAX
(smiles)
Exactly.

SUNDAY
(looks him over)
You’re not as big of an asshole
as I thought you were.

MAX
And you’re not a complete bitch.

Pause.
SUNDAY

Yeah, well -- keep it under your hat.

INT. HONEY’S UNDERGROUND LAIR - AT THAT MOMENT
All of the agents, ops and techs stare at honey, white-faced.

Honey paces back and forth. Red-faced.
FURIOUS. She stops. WHIRLS AROUND.
Points at Rock.

HONEY
How could those GIRLS have taken out
Shao Lin and her team? TELL ME.

ROCK
I don’t know, sir.
Shao Lin is one of our best --

HONEY
WAS. She’s DEAD.
Do you realize that a STRIPPER
and a STUNT WOMAN have taken out
three of our best operatives?

ROCK
Yes, ma’am.

HONEY
So what are you gonna DO ABOUT IT?

ROCK
I, uh -- uh --

HONEY
I can’t HEAR YOU --

ROCK
Well, let me think a sec --

Honey WHIPS OUT a 9mm Glock.
SHOVES IT in his mouth.

HONEY
YOU’RE gonna take care of them, GOT IT?

Rock nods, eyes filled with terrified tears.

ROCK
Yeth, mummm --

HONEY
(CLICKS the safety)
And you’re not gonna FUCK UP, RIGHT?

ROCK
(shakes his head ‘no’)
Nho, nho --

HONEY
You got THAT right, MISTER.

She YANKS the gun out of his mouth.
Wipes it on the front of his jacket. Sneers.

HONEY (CONT’D)
Now go, GO -- take care them.
And if you DON’T, don’t COME BACK.
(beat)
And I will hunt you down
to the end of the earth, GOT IT?

ROCK
(nods)
G-got it. Got it. Don’t worry.
I’ll take care of it.
I’ll -- take care of it.

HONEY
Then GO. Don’t just stand there.
Get the fuck OUTTA HERE and GET THEM.

ROCK
Y-yes, MA’AM.

He hurries away. Shaking.
Muttering to himself.

Everyone stares at Honey.
Scared to death.

HONEY
Damn, all of a sudden I’m STARVING.
Who wants to order a pizza?

INT. MALL BASEMENT - UNDERGROUND CORRIDOR - AT THAT MOMENT
Dimly-lit. A dim bulb FLASHES in the gloom.
Water drips down the walls.

April and Cherry walk down the corridor
wearing their backpacks.
April shines a flashlight on a door.

APRIL
See? We can see each store as we pass it.

CHERRY
Yeah, but how are we gonna get out of here?
The entire mall is going to be
completely surrounded by now.

APRIL
We’ll think of something.
We always do --

Cherry’s cell phone RINGS.
They look at each other. Huh?

She fishes it out. Answers it.

CHERRY
Hello -- ?

INTERCUT WITH:

EXT. HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD - NIGHT
A big, black HUMMER barrels down the sleazy boulevard.

INT. ROCK’S HUMMER - MOVING - NIGHT
Rock sits behind the wheel.
Speaking on his hands-free cell.

ROCK
Is this -- Cherry Nation?

CHERRY
Who wants to know?

ROCK
Rock Vargas. You don’t know me.
I used to work for Honey Almond --

CHERRY
(to April)
It’s some guy who says
he used to work for Honey Almond.

APRIL
Hang up. It’s a trap.

Cherry nods. CLICKS her phone shut.

ROCK
Hello?
(beat)

Shit.

He redials.
Cherry’s phone RINGS again.
She answers it.

CHERRY
Hello?

ROCK
It’s me again, don’t hang up,
I want to HELP YOU.

CHERRY
Fuck you.
You think we’re that STUPID?

ROCK
No, no, no --
I think you’re fucking BRILLIANT.
That’s why I want to work for you.

CHERRY
WHAT?

ROCK
Honey Almond is a fucking PSYCHO.
I’m SICK of working for her.
After you iced Shao and her girls,
she sent me to whack you,
but I know that’s impossible.
So now I’M dead --
(exhales)
I’m tired of being a bad guy.
I want to do something GOOD for a change.
I’ve got intel that’ll make your head spin.
I know you’re in a jam right now.
Let me help you.

CHERRY
How do I know you’re telling me the truth?

ROCK
What if I gave you Honey’s location?

CHERRY
Hold on a sec --
(cups the phone, to April)
He wants to defect, work for us.
Says he can give us Honey’s location.

APRIL
I dunno. Smells fishy --

CHERRY
Yeah, but if he doesn’t know we’re suspicious,
what do we have to lose?
Worse comes to worse, we clip him.

APRIL
Okay. Tell him to come get us. Alone.

CHERRY
(nods, into the phone)
You still there?

ROCK
Yeah. Are we cool?

CHERRY
Like ice.
We need you to come pick us up, ALONE.
You’re gonna need FBI credentials.

ROCK
No problem. Also have CIA,
Homeland Security, NSA, Interpol --

CHERRY
Well, aren’t you the eager forger.
I’ll text you our coordinates,
and then get your ass over here, PRONTO.
GOT it?

ROCK
Got it. Thank you.
You won’t regret it.

CHERRY
Solid. But know this.
Any monkey business,
and it’s boom, boom, boom --
out go the lights.

1 comment:

  1. Whew... thank you! Yes, a little break after that last chapter... wow, that was amazing!

    So, Rock has finally made a smart decision... not like he has a choice though, as you say.

    No way he is gonna take out April and Cherry, so he might as well join forces with the girls because Honey will use his guts for garters (can't remember what movie I heard that in) when she finds out the girls are still alive.

    And he better not double cross Cherry and April... if he tries to, his fate is gonna be something like "...head exploding in a red mist", right? Haha! I love that phrase!

    Okay, let's go see how they get out of this little jam.... xoxoxo <3

    ReplyDelete