Town Without Pity

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 1 of DAZED, BEAUTIFUL & BRUISED, we meet private eye Carrie Love, who lets us know in no uncertain terms what she thinks of her home town, Los Angeles ...


EXT. MULHOLLAND DRIVE - SCENIC VIEW - NIGHT
A swanky, deliriously kinky go-go groove --
My Life With the Thrill Kill Kult’s
THE INTERNATIONAL SIN SET.

The glittering panorama of
the San Fernando Valley twinkles below.

A big, silvery moon
shines o’er the tackiness.

CARRIE LOVE (V.O.)
New York, New York --
the city so nice,
they named it twice.
The city that never sleeps.
But in Los Angeles,
people are in bed by nine.
And they only named it once.
Enough said?

A beat-up old PICKUP TRUCK
filled with MEXICAN GARDENERS comes
TEARING BY in a crunch of gravel.

CARRIE LOVE (V.O.)
Actually, the full name is
'El Pueblo de La Neustra Senora,
Reina de Los Angeles.
'The City of our Lady,
Queen of the Angels.'
No wonder they shortened it.
Ever take a close look at this
never-bustling metropolis?
Not exactly pure and chaste, huh.

A HUMVEE
comes into view.
The absurd vehicle slows, parks.

IN THE CAR
an ARROGANT HIPSTER (25)
and his MILLENNIAL GIRLFRIEND (21),
a whisper-thin young hottie
start making out.

CARRIE LOVE (V.O.)
Like the song says,
it’s a town without pity.
But that doesn’t stop the
millions of boys and girls
that come here with
stars in their eyes.
Almost none of them make it, of course --
but that doesn’t stop them; those eager,
fresh-scrubbed teeming masses
from the hinterlands with
visions of celebrity
dancing in their empty heads.

The couple starts getting hot and heavy.
Hands go to private places.

HOTTIE GIRLFRIEND
No, I told you -- NO!

ARROGANT HIPSTER
C’mon, Tifney -- I promise
I’ll respect you and shit.

HOTTIE GIRLFRIEND
You expect me to jerk your stick
like some kinda sleazy cooz?

ARROGANT HIPSTER
Hey. I don’t get a happy ending --
you don’t get a happy ending.

Pause.

CARRIE LOVE (V.O.)
But our story starts far away
from this airbrushed mecca
of cigar-smoking goateed posers
and collagen-impaired faux-fatales --
in a tiny little berg
on the wrong side of the tracks.
(beat)
Except there’s no tracks, and the
one-mile stretch of trailer homes
makes a good case for selective breeding.

A pistol CLICK-CLICKS.
The girl SCREAMS --
and gunshots POP-POP-POP.

CARRIE LOVE (V.O.)
Or maybe just a little ethnic cleansing.