Monday, June 9, 2014

Bound For Pleasure


Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 6 of THE DISH, faded B-movie starlet Haven Crayce panics when her husband slips and falls in the bathroom on their houseboat ... so she races to get help from the woman she's cheating on him with, personal trainer Jett Targo, interrupting her workout with a client ...


INT. CRAYCE HOUSEBOAT - MASTER BATHROOM - MORNING
Dart Crayce is in the bathtub.
Bony ass toward us.

He pulls himself up,
hanging onto a chrome handle
bolted into the tiles --
which COMES LOOSE
with a CRUNCH --

DART
What the -- ?

And he SLIPS!
BANG, he goes down.

CRACKS his head.
BANGS his ass on
the cold, hard porcelain.

HAVEN (O.C.)
Dart, honey?
You okay in there?
We don’t want you to --

She walks in.

HAVEN
Shrivel into a prune --

Sees him.
SCREAMS.

HAVEN
Dart!

Races over.
Puts her arms around him.

HAVEN
Honey, are you okay? Dart?
Can you hear me? Honey?

EXT. MARINA PENINSULA - OCEAN BOARDWALK - DAY
Jett trains a FAT,
SWEATING VENTURE CAPITALIST (30’s),
a pair of ten-pound
free-weights in his hands.

He raises the right,
then the left.

Rearranging the deck chairs
on the Titanic.

FAT, SWEATING VENTURE CAPITALIST
-- and I closed at
five-point-four million.
He didn’t know
what the fuck hit him.
Got the cocksucker
right where it hurts.
Bang, zoom -- right
to the moon, Alice.

JETT
Okay.
Let’s do some squats.

Haven appears, with Buster.
Amazing in a bikini top.

Denim Mini.
Six-inch wedgies.

Freaked behind
heart-shaped shades.

HAVEN
Jett, I need
to talk to you.

JETT
What’s wrong?

Fat’s cell phone RINGS.

FAT, SWEATING VENTURE CAPITALIST
(to Jett)
Hold on a sec,
I gotta take this --
(into the phone)
It went down HOW MUCH?

He waddles away,
out of ear shot.
Waving his arms madly.

HAVEN
Dart fell in the bathtub.
Banged his head.

JETT
Why didn’t you call me?

HAVEN
I don’t have your number.

JETT
Did you call 911?

HAVEN
He wouldn’t let me.
He doesn’t like doctors.

JETT
But -- is he okay?

HAVEN
Oh, sure.
Three Advils, couple a
hits off one of his
'Bobby Mitchum joints,'
and he’s sleeping
like a baby.

JETT
But he might
have a concussion.
Maybe we should
call his doctor.

HAVEN
Are you kidding?
He might have to
go to the hospital,
and then we’re FUCKED.
He might not
ever come back!

JETT
But if he has a concussion,
and he’s sleeping --

HAVEN
Oh, shit.

JETT
Oh, shit is right.
C’mon, let’s go --

They start walking away.
Fat ambles over.

FAT, SWEATING VENTURE CAPITALIST
Hey, where are you going?
What about the
rest of my workout?

JETT
Sorry, uh -- family emergency.
We gotta end early today.
Go home and do thirty minutes
on the Stairmaster.
I’ll see you on Wednesday.

FAT, SWEATING VENTURE CAPITALIST
Okay, sure.
(looks at Haven)
Hey.
Haven’t I seen you
somewhere before?
Are you an actress?

HAVEN
Why, yes I am.
What did you see me in?
Wishcraft IV?
Spring Break Babylon?

FAT, SWEATING VENTURE CAPITALIST
No --
(SNAPS his fingers)
That’s it.
Bound for Pleasure.
Bondage flick.

HAVEN
As if.
Pervert.
(to Jett)
Come on, honey.
Let’s go back to my place --
and do naughty things.

JETT
(whispers)
Haven.

FAT, SWEATING VENTURE CAPITALIST
You two are -- ?

HAVEN
(laughs, evil)
That’s right.
And no, you can’t watch.
So why don’t you go home,
jerk off and think about
what I’m going to do
to your TRAINER.

PUSH IN ON Fat, Sweating.
Beady eyes flickering.

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