Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Luc Besson, Eat Your Heart Out

Happy Hump Day, crime humpsters! It's time once again to take a trip to a place that dares not speak it's name. A place of such complete, pure evil, that most dare not tread, unless they're like you, looking for adventure ... at That Killing Feeling.

Into today's chapter from NOWHERE GIRLS, Homeland Security agents Cherry Nation and April Street are being pursued at high speed in their Winnebago through a parking garage structure by the FBI ... and the deadly assassin Shao Lin and her 'assistants' ...


INT. MAX’S SUV - MOVING - NIGHT
Max drives through the parking lot, looking for the RV.

MAX
I don’t see it, I don’t see it.

SUNDAY
Think, think, think, -- where could they hide?

They look at each other. A lightbulb POPS.
Max turns the wheel, STEPS on the gas.

INT. PARKING GARAGE - NIGHT
The Winnebago SHOOTS through the garage.

INT. SERGE’S MOTOR HOME - CONTINUOUS
April points to an ‘up ramp.

APRIL
Go up, not down. Or we’ll be trapped.

SERGE
(downshifts)
I’m one step ahead of you --

CHERRY
April, you grab the laptop.
I’ll get the weapons.

SIMON
I have an idea.
But my bike can only carry two people --

IN THE PARKING GARAGE
The RV gets to the ramp, starts going up.

AT THE ENTRANCE RAMP
Max’s SUV FLIES downward, turns.
SCREECHES, burning rubber.

MAX
Which way, which way?

SUNDAY
No way they’d be stupid enough to go down. Go UP --

Max turns the wheel,
SLAMS the vehicle up the ramp.

EXT. SHOPPING CENTER - NIGHT
Shao’s bug ROARS into the parking lot. Starts circling.

IN THE BUG
Shao scans the parking lot. No sign of the RV.

NASHI
(spins the wheel)
We go around and around until we FIND THEM.

Suzu studies her I-phone.
Listening through headphones.

SUZU
A-HA.
(points)
FBI go into PARKING GARAGE.

Nashi HITS the gas.
ROARS toward the entrance.

SHAO
Got you now, girlies.
Momma needs to have a word with you --

EXT. PARKING STRUCTURE - ROOF - NIGHT
The RV comes up the ramp.
ROARS across the roof.
SCREECHES to a halt.

April, Cherry and Serge PILE OUT.
Simon ROARS out the back door on his Harley.
They race over to him.

SIMON
(points)
We’re in luck.
There’s another bike over there.
April can ride with me.
You two take that one.

April hefts her bag. Jumps on.

SERGE
But I can’t drive a motorcycle.

CHERRY
I can --

She RACES OVER to the bike.
Pulls out wires on the steering column.
Touches them together. They SPARK.
The engine ROARS.

She pulls it up to Serge.
He hops on.

SERGE
Luc Besson, eat your heart out.

SIMON
(to Cherry, points)
We drive to the rear wall over there.
Then ride over there and jump
onto the roof of the building next door.
Got it?

CHERRY
Got it.

Just then the FBI SUV ROARS OUT onto the roof.
Stops. Honey and Max JUMP OUT.
Pull out their weapons. Take Aim.

MAX
FBI. Stay where you are.
DON’T MOVE, OR WE’LL SHOOT.

SUNDAY
(on her cell phone)
We have the target in sight.
We need backup, NOW.
And where’s the fucking CHOPPER?

CHERRY
(sees them)
Quick, behind the RV.

Simon and Cherry HIT THE GAS.
Drive the bikes around.
Everyone JUMPS off.
GRABS their weapons.

MAX AND SUNDAY
Start FIRING at them.
BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG.

APRIL AND CHERRY
Fire back. BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG.

SERGE
Climbs up to the roof of the RV.
Opens a compartment.
Revealing a GIANT M-240 ARMY MACHINE GUN.

SERGE
Time to put on full metal jacket --

And starts SPRAYING Max and Sunday with MACHINE GUN FIRE.
RAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT.

SHAO’S BUG
Drive up onto the roof behind the FBI vehicles.

IN THE CAR
Shao shakes her fist furiously.

SHAO
Goddamn G-boys try to spoil our fun.
C’mon, girlies. Let’s go get ‘em.

They open the car doors and pile out.

MAX AND SUNDAY
Take cover behind their vehicle.

MAX
Where the fuck they get THAT?

SUNDAY
(into her phone)
Hey, SHIT FOR BRAINS. Where’s my --

A DEAFENING ROAR, as A BLACK HAWK HELICOPTER flies overhead.
Two more FBI vehicles appear on the roof.
More AGENTS race across the roof toward the Winnebago.

TO BE CONTINUED ...

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