Bohemian Rhapsody

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Hump Day. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 8 of RIDGEWAY, just as Cate gets settled in her new home with Kayla, she discovers that the gas company mistakenly shut off their hot water, so she can't take a much-needed shower after her long road trip. Later that night, while watching a movie with Kayla in the living room, she discovers the perils of living with cats when one of them sneezes and sprays her bare leg with snot ...


INT. KAYLA’S APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DUSK
Cozy and dark with the shades drawn.
Indigo walls. Funky furniture.

Primitive, spiritual art. Tons of candles.
Bohemian rhapsody in blue.

Cate finishes setting up her stereo.
Turns it on. We hear some pretty,
Smiths-like new wave song.
Kayla walks in the room, pissed off.

CATE
Got the stereo hooked up --
(sees her expression)
What’s wrong?

KAYLA
There’s no hot water.

CATE
What?

KAYLA
The creep upstairs moved out
and the gas company was
just here to it shut off --
but they shut off ours, too.

CATE
I was really looking forward
to taking a shower.

KAYLA
I know, I’m sorry.
I’ll call the gas company.

CATE
Hey. I’ve got something
that’ll cheer us up.

She walks over to her suitcase.
Pulls out a heavily sealed plastic bag
the size of a paperback. Holds it up.

KAYLA
What’s that?

CATE
Ounce and a half of sticky bud.
OG Kush. Surfer Tom triple-sealed it.
(smiles)
Ready to fry the friendly skies?

INT. KAYLA’S APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT
Cate and Kayla cuddle on the couch
watching the flat screen, candles lit,
both really high, eyes druggy slits.

Cate downs a shot of bourbon,
takes a pull on her beer.

Kayla sips a glass of wine.
Can you say ‘rocky mountain high?’

ON THE SCREEN
We see glam brit-rockers
Suede performing onstage.

Singer Brett Anderson, a Ferry/Bowie
hybrid of decadent beauty croons
a fragile ode to the devastation of heroin.

BRETT ANDERSON
(electronic)
Where’s all the money gone?
All up the hole in your arm --

CATE
Sways to the music,
softly mouthing the lyrics.

Kayla loads the bong.
Takes a big hit.
Cups the top with her palm.

Passes it to Cate.
She does one.
Both hold it in.

Then look at the cats on their laps. Smile.
Then BLOW the smoke in the felines’ faces.

One of them SNEEZES, blows
snot all over Cate’s bare thigh.

PUSH IN ON Cate’s face. Disgusted.