Monday, November 30, 2015

The Inside Man


Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 14 of BABY HEISTER, Doc starts teaching Kelsey how to be a heister, but first has to whip her into shape physically and sets her out on a grueling workout ...

EXT. RANCH - DIRT ROAD - DAY
The chainsaw-psychobilly
zombie-foot-stomp of Horrorpops’
THELMA AND LOUISE over --

Kelsey. Listening to the song on her I-pod.
RUNNING on the side of the road.

Pumping like a demon in the blistering heat.
Shorts and T-shirt soaked in sweat.
Fierce. Determined.

She passes a row of crops.
A big, old barn. Runs past a pond.

A guy on a tractor, who HONKS.
Hits the front drive. Runs up to Doc.

Standing on the front porch,
holding a stop watch.

She stops. Tries to catch her breath.
He hands her a canteen. Drinks greedily.
Then pours it over her head.

DOC
Not bad. Five minutes.
Pretty soon we’ll get it down to four.

KELSEY
You trying to kill me?

DOC
When the shit comes down,
you gotta be able to MOVE.
Heisting isn’t just fast cars
and big guns, girlie-girl.

KELSEY
Speaking of guns, when do I get to --

DOC
After breakfast. C’mon.
Let’s go chow down.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN - DAY
Kelsey and Doc sit at
the rustic, wooden table.

Jo serves them a big meal of
flapjacks, eggs, toast, bacon and sausage.

Then sits and joins them.
Kelsey starts wolfing it down.

DOC
This looks great, Jo.

KELSEY
(mouth full)
Yeah, Jo --

JO
Don’t talk with your mouth full,
Kelsey. It’s not ladylike.

KELSEY
(swallows)
Sorry.

DOC
Okay. First lesson.
Planning the heist.
(off Kelsey’s look)
Planning the job is
the most important part.
If it smells bad, you walk away.
If it looks good, then you
plan it out to the smallest detail.
(beat)
Then you assemble your team -- the string.
You only work with people
you’ve worked with before,
or people your colleagues can vouch for
cause they’ve worked with ‘em.
You NEVER work with someone
nobody knows. Ever.

JO
Except for the inside man, of course.

DOC
I was gettin’ to that.
(to Kelsey)
The inside man is someone who works
at the joint you’re gonna to knock over.
They usually come to you with the job.
Once in a blue moon you approach them,
if you’ve got something on ‘em.
(smiles)
I met Jo when she was
the inside man on a job.

KELSEY
I didn’t know that.
What was the job?

JO
Coin convention.
I was the roper on a long con
involving one of the dealers,
and then realized you could
take the whole shebang.

DOC
She noticed I was casing the joint --

PUSH IN ON Jo’s face.
Eyes dancing with delight.

JO
And the rest is history --

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