What You Talkin' Bout, Willis?

Hey there, horror kids. Happy fucking Monday! Hope you had a great weak-end. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 16 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, the cops question Frankie's mother Julie about his underground lab, Frankie and dead cheerleader Shayla head off on their 'first date,' and Shayla's parents appear on the local news pleading with the public to help find her ...


INT. PATROL CAR - DAY
Chet and Beck sit in the car sipping coffee.
Watching Frankie’s house.

CHET
So how long have been into --
infectious diseases?

BECK
One day as a little kid,
I saw The Andromeda Strain on TV.
Changed my life. The idea that a virus
could wipe out the entire planet
scared the shit out of me.
I vowed to never let that happen.

CHET
Wow.

BECK
When did you know you
wanted to be a cop?

CHET
Similar story --

BECK
What inspired you?
LAPD Blue? Homicide?

CHET
(clears throat)
Barney Miller.
(shrugs)
I’m an orphan.
Those guys had a real sense of camaraderie,
like a family, you know?

BECK
(smiles, nods, sees something)
There she is.

CHET
Let’s go --

EXT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - FRONT DOOR - DAY
Julie pulls out her keys.
Unlocks the door.
Chet and Beck appear behind her.

CHET
Excuse me, Julie Stein?

JULIE
(tired)
That’s me --
(turns, looks)
Officer. Is there anything wrong?

BECK
We’d like to talk to you
about your son Frankie.
(off her stare, shows ID)
Beck Driver, CDC.

JULIE
(alarmed)
What’s wrong? Wh-what did he do?

CHET
Can we talk inside?

INT. JULIE’S LIVING ROOM - DAY
Julie sits on the couch.
Chet sits in a chair facing her.
Beck stands in front of the fireplace.

JULIE
A rat? Really?

CHET
Yes, ma’am.

BECK
And we’re looking for the person
who brought it back to life.

CHET
Your neighbor Peggy Heck told us
your son Frankie has a --
lab in your basement.

JULIE
(under her breath)
That bitch --
(recovers)
Well, yes.
But that’s for his chemistry class.
He wouldn’t do anything like that.
(proud)
He got in early admission to MIT.

BECK
Would you mind if we took a look?

JULIE
Well, I don’t know.
I’m not allowed down there.

CHET
We can get a warrant.

JULIE
(sighs, stands)
Follow me --

INT. FRANKIE’S VOLKSWAGON BUS - DAY
Frankie sits behind the wheel.
Shayla sits next to him.

Now wearing a long, blonde wig.
She adjusts it clumsily.

SHAYLA
It’s -- hot. Itchy --

FRANKIE
I’m sorry, but you have to wear it, okay?
(beat)
Think of it like a disguise.

SHAYLA
(stares out the window)
Disguise.

FRANKIE
I thought we could go to Benny’s.
Hope that’s okay --

SHAYLA
Benny’s --
(thinks)
Willis.

FRANKIE
(nervous)
W-willis?

SHAYLA
Yeah. Went there -- with Willis.
(looks at him)
Do you -- know him?

FRANKIE
Uh, no --

SHAYLA
CHEESE-BURGER.

FRANKIE
Huh?

SHAYLA
(sadly)
Don’t -- know.

FRANKIE
Don’t strain yourself
trying to remember everything.
Just think about the fun
we’re going to have.
(smiles)
Our first date --

Shayla smiles.
Looks out the window at the scenery.

SHAYLA
Yeah.

FRANKIE
So you like cheeseburgers, huh?
I do, too.

SHAYLA
He -- HIT me.

FRANKIE
Who hit you?

SHAYLA
Willis.
(looks at him)
You don’t -- know him?

PUSH IN ON Frankie’s face.
Quietly freaking out.

FRANKIE
No. Sorry --
(bad fake laugh)
Whatchoo talkin’ bout?

INT. NEWS STUDIO - DAY
A cozy, cheap ‘living room’ set
that would do Good Morning America proud.

Del Dunn sits on a chair
facing Brub and Adelle Petrie,
seated on an overstuffed couch.

Adelle clutches a tissue in her hands,
eyes blinking back tears.

Brub holds a mug of coffee.
Looks haunted. Lost.

Del leans into the camera.
Serious. Speaks in hushed tones.

DEL
We’re here today with Brub and Adelle Petrie,
the parents of head cheerleader Shayla Petrie,
who has been missing for two days now --
(to them)
Thank you for coming.
I know it must have been hard for you,
given the circumstances.

BRUB
No sh- (BEEP) --
(beat)
Uh, sorry.

ADELLE
(low)
You and your foul mouth --

DEL
Is there anything you’d like
to share with the folks out there?

BRUB
If anybody knows the whereabouts
of our darling daughter,
PLEASE notify the police IMMEDIATELY.
Shayla’s a GOOD girl,
not some common BAR-SLUT.

He takes a sip of coffee.
Eyes burning with hatred.

ADELLE
Please help us find our little girl.
If something bad has happened to her,
I don’t know WHAT we’ll do --

She trails off, fights back tears.

BRUB
(low)
I know ONE thing YOU won’t do --

ADELLE
(hisses)
SORRY I haven’t been
in the mood to (BEEP) you.
HONESTLY, how can you
think of SEX at a time like this --

DEL
I think we’re straying off the topic --

BRUB
EXCUSE me if a man has NEEDS, sister.
A good (BEEP) relieves STRESS.

ADELLE
Watch your (BEEP) mouth, mister --

BRUB
Oh, YEAH?

DEL
(touches her earpiece)
What?
(to them)
Put a SOCK IN IT.
(listens)
Really?

A HAND appears next to her chair.
Hands her a piece of paper.

DEL (CONT'D)
(reads it)
I’ve just been handed a late-breaking bulletin.
Police now have a suspect in the case.
Their identity has not been released yet,
but it’s believed to be one of Shayla’s classmates.

BRUB
I (BEEP) KNEW it.
It’s that no-good BOYFRIEND of hers --

DEL
(agitated)
Thanks for stopping by, Brub and Adelle.
We now pause for station identification --

Lead On, Macduff

Hey there, horror kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 15 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, detective Chet Ordesky and CDC agent Beck Driver get into a fight. Meanwhile, science genius nerd Frankie Stein visits dead cheerleader Vita Heck in his tree house, where she announces she wants to go on a 'date' ... and then, to make matters worse, Frankie's friend Josh announces that he can't keep their secret any more, and wants to turn himself in ...


EXT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - FRONT DOOR - DAY
Chet and Beck stand on the front stoop.
Chet RINGS the bell.

BECK
Nobody’s home.
Let’s come back later.

CHET
Hold on a sec.
Maybe she’s taking a shit.

BECK
That’s disgusting.

CHET
Haven’t you ever been
uncoiling a sidewinder
and the doorbell rang?

BECK
First of all, I’m a petite flower.
I don’t DO ‘side-winders.’

CHET
Well, excuse me, big-city gal.
I guess your shit doesn’t stink.

BECK
You got THAT right.

He RINGS the bell again.

CHET
I know what your problem is.

BECK
Oh? And what would that be?

CHET
You need to get laid.
(off her look)
I can tell it’s been a long time.

BECK
That’s none of your fucking business.

CHET
Look. Your cheeks
are turning red. I’m RIGHT.

BECK
(looks at this belly)
'Time to make the donuts' --

CHET
Hey. No need to be nasty.

BECK
You can dish it out,
but you can’t take it?
Small-town HICK.

CHET
Bitch.

BECK
Asshole.

CHET
WHORE.

BECK
Fat FUCK.

They stare at each other a long beat.

CHET
I’m sorry.
I shouldn’t have gotten personal with you --
(beat)
The wife and I’ve not been --
(beat)
I’ve been sleeping on the couch.

BECK
Oh, wow. That sucks.

CHET
Yeah.

Pause.

BECK
You’re right.
It’s been awhile,
and I get -- defensive.
(beat)
Sorry.

CHET
(nods)
Whattaya say we get some coffee
and come back later?

BECK
(glimmer of a smile)
Lead on, MacDuff.

CHET
Who’s MacDuff?

BECK
Never mind --

INT. FRANKIE’S BASEMENT LAB - DAY
The electronic equipment near the workbench is gone.
In it’s place is a gerbil in a cage.

A child’s chemistry set is displayed.
We see an X-box and a stack of videogames.

FRANKIE
My god, how dull.
(sighs)
Should work.

He SNAPS a padlock shut on a big cabinet.
Shuts off the lights. Goes to the stairs.

INT. FRANKIE’S KITCHEN - DAY
Frankie opens up the fridge.
Starts searching for a snack.
Then hears a car door SLAM outside.

FRANKIE
Mom --

He hurries out the back door.
Julie walks into the kitchen.
Puts down her bag. Sighs.

INT. TREE HOUSE - DAY
Shayla lays on the futon
watching a soap opera on TV.

SHAYLA
NO. She’s -- pregnant --

The door opens.
Frankie walks in. Closes it.

SHAYLA
You’re home -- early.

FRANKIE
Had an emergency
I had to take care of.
(beat)
What are you watching?

SHAYLA
As The -- World Turns.

FRANKIE
Soap opera --

SHAYLA
I want to -- go on -- a date.

FRANKIE
A date?

SHAYLA
(points at the TV)
Like -- them.
(beat)
Want to go -- outside.
Feel -- cooped up.

FRANKIE
Okay --

SHAYLA
R-really?

FRANKIE
Yeah, sure --

Frankie’s cell phone RINGS.
He answers it.

FRANKIE
Hello?

INTERCUT WITH:

INT. HIGH SCHOOL CORRIDOR - DAY
Josh weaves through
the throng of kids
on their way to class
talking on his smart-phone.

JOSH
Where are you?
You weren’t in chem lab.

FRANKIE
I had a -- emergency --

JOSH
Don’t tell me.
I don’t want to know.
(beat)
I can’t take it anymore, Frankie.
I’m gonna turn myself in.

FRANKIE
NO. You CAN’T do that --

JOSH
I can’t sleep at night, Frankie.
Can’t eat. I can’t take it anymore.

FRANKIE
I need to talk to you.
I need to meet with you.

JOSH
I don’t see the point in --

FRANKIE
Josh, PLEASE.
We can’t talk
about this on the phone.
Meet me at Benny’s
in half an hour, okay? Please?
I need to talk to you.

JOSH
I dunno, it seems --

FRANKIE
Josh, we’ve been friends
since we were SIX.
I gave you your
first copy of PLAYBOY --

JOSH
(sighs)
Okay, okay.
I’ll meet you there.
(beat)
But then afterward,
I’m turning myself in --

Re-Animator

Happy Thursday, horror kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 14 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, officer Chet Ordesky and CDC agent Beck Driver interview Peggy Heck about who might have re-animated the dead rat -- and she tells them about Frankie Stein's secret underground lab. Peggy's daughter Vita overhears this, and confronts Frankie about how she knows that he brought dead cheerleader Shayla Petrie back to life -- and then expresses her undying love.


EXT. VITA’S HOUSE - DAY
A bright, sunny day. Birds are chirping.
The wind whistles through the trees.
All that’s missing is ‘The Beaver.’

Chet and Beck stand at the front door,
side by side.

He takes off his shades.
Slips them in his shirt pocket.
RINGS the doorbell.

CHET
Remember, let me do the talking.

BECK
(bristling)
Of course --

PEGGY (O.C.)
(faint)
Just a minute --

The door OPENS.
Peggy’s smile fades. Disappointed.

PEGGY
Officer Ordesky.
Nice to -- see you again.

CHET
(tips his hat)
Mrs. Heck --

PEGGY
Please. Peggy.
(beat)
Are you here -- about the rat?

CHET
Yes, Ma’am.
(gestures to Beck)
This is Beck Driver,
from the Center For Disease Control.

PEGGY
(eyes wide)
Oh, dear --

CHET
Nothing to be alarmed about.
We’re just trying to find out
where the rat came from.

BECK
This is going to sound strange,
but do you know of anyone doing any
medical experiments in the neighborhood?

PEGGY
'Medical experiments?'

BECK
Yes. It seems that the rat
was brought back from the dead --
and we’re looking for the person who did it.
(conspiratorial)
It’s a major medical breakthrough.

CHET
You’d be doing your duty for your country,
Mrs. -- Peggy.

Peggy blinks. Looks at them.

PEGGY
Well, there’s young Frankie Stein next door.
They say he’s a genius.
Has a laboratory in his basement
and everything.

BECK
A -- basement lab?

PEGGY
Oh, yes. His mother Julie
isn’t allowed down there,
but she’s told me he does all kinds of
top-secret things down there.
(brightly)
I hope that’s helpful.

BECK
(barely containing her excitement)
That’s VERY helpful. Thank you.

INSIDE THE HOUSE
Standing in the doorway
to the kitchen is Vita.
Listening.

VITA
(whispers)
I’ve got you NOW, Frankie Stein --

She grabs her backpack and heads toward the door.

OUTSIDE THE HOUSE
Chet and Beck start walking next door.

CHET
I don’t believe it. Frankie Stein.
'FS.' The initials on the SHOE.

BECK
We GOT the little bastard NOW --

INT. HIGH SCHOOL CORRIDOR - DAY
The joint is clogged with kids.
Frankie stands at his locker
working the combination.

Vita comes up behind him.

VITA
Frankie, we need to talk.

FRANKIE
(turns, looks)
Hey, Vita. Sorry, can’t talk now,
don’t wanna be late for class.

He turns to leave.

VITA
I saw you with Shayla last night.

FRANKIE
(stops, stares)
That’s crazy. She’s -- missing.

VITA
No, she’s not.
She’s in your tree house.

FRANKIE
(gasps)
I, I can explain --

VITA
You fucking BETTER --
(grabs his hand)
Come with me.

She drags him into --

INT. GIRLS’ ROOM - DAY
Empty except for a YOUNG GIRL WITH BRACES
drying her hands at the sink.
She sees Frankie and BOLTS for the door.

VITA
What the FUCK, Frankie?
She looks DEAD.
Did you bring her back to life?

FRANKIE
Well, you see --
(beat)
Uh -- it’s a long story --

VITA
A cop and woman from the CDC
were at my house this morning
talking to my mother about
the DEAD RAT in my basement
that was running around like crazy.
You did that too, right?

FRANKIE
It’s not what it looks like --
(sighs)
I was doing a dead-cell
reanimation experiment --
(gestures helplessly)
And it worked.

VITA
Do you realize how much trouble you’re in?
My mother told them about your basement lab --

FRANKIE
Oh, SHIT.
(realizes)
Did you tell them anything?

VITA
No, no, no. I’d never do that.
I want to help you.
What you’ve done is INCREDIBLE.

FRANKIE
You w-want to help me? Why?

VITA
Frankie, don’t you know?
(beat)
Don’t you remember 'the ceremony?'

FRANKIE
But we were TEN, Vita.
That was kid’s stuff.

VITA
(eyes welling up)
I never stopped loving you --

Frankie stares.
Careful what you say.
You need her help.

He takes her hands in his.

FRANKIE
Can we -- talk about that later?
I’m kinda -- freaked out right now --

VITA
Of course, of course.
(thinks)
Go to the nurse, say your sick,
then go home and hide anything in your lab
that can be used as evidence.
(realizes)
Oh, shit. Wait. The cop and the CDC lady
are probably there right now --

FRANKIE
No, it’s okay.
My mom’s still at work.
She doesn’t get home until ten.
She did a double shift last night.

VITA
Perfect.

FRANKIE
Yeah. Okay --

VITA
Don’t worry.
We’ll figure this out.

FRANKIE
I don’t know what to say.

She puts her hands on his hips.
Draws him close --

VITA
'Thank you' would be nice --

And grinds into his crotch.
Kisses him deeply.
She pulls back.

Frankie stares at her.
Aroused. Confused.

FRANKIE
(whispers)
Thank you.

VITA
You’re welcome.
Now go, scoot --
go see the nurse.

He nods.
Gives her a half-smile.
Hurries out.

VITA
(watches him go)
You're mine, Frankie Stein.
All mine --

Designated Driver

Hey there, horror kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 13 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, the plot thickens when science genius nerd Frankie Stein moves his dead girlfriend Shayla Petrie into a tree house in his backyard. But when his next door neighbor Vita Heck sees what's going on out her window, she makes a horrifying discovery ...


INT. HOSPITAL - NURSE’S STATION - NIGHT
Very quiet at this late hour.
Julie Stein wears a nurse’s uniform,
sits at her desk at the corner of two corridors.

A PLEASANT-FACED LARGE NURSE (40’s) walks up to her.

PLEASANT-FACED LARGE NURSE
I’m going down to the cafeteria to get coffee.
Can I get you anything?

JULIE
I’d LOVE a coffee.
These double-shifts are KILLING me. Thanks --

Pleasant-Faced nods. Walks off.
Julie picks up the phone. Dials a number. Listens.

JULIE
Hello, Frankie --

INTERCUT WITH:

INT. FRANKIE’S BASEMENT LAB - CONTINUOUS
Frankie’s on the phone.
Shayla watches TV in the background.

FRANKIE
Hey, mom. What’s up?

JULIE
I’m so sorry, but Tami called in sick.
I have to do a double-shift again tonight.

FRANKIE
That’s okay, mom.
I’ll just nuke the leftovers from last night.

JULIE
Great. How was school today?

FRANKIE
Uh -- fine. School was -- great.

JULIE
Are you okay? Is something wrong?
You sound funny.

FRANKIE
(looks at Shayla)
No. Everything’s -- fine.
Just -- tired, that’s all.

Shayla raises her arms in the air. SHOUTS.

SHAYLA
KILL ‘EM --

JULIE
What was that?

FRANKIE
Something on TV --
(gestures to Shayla to shush)
Sorry you have to work late again.

JULIE
(sighs)
Yeah, me too. At least I get overtime.
See you in the morning, honey.

FRANKIE
Bye, mom. Good night.

JULIE
Love you.

FRANKIE
Love you. Bye.

He hangs up. Looks at Shayla.

FRANKIE
I’m sorry, baby -- but you need to be quiet
when I’m on the phone, okay?

SHAYLA
Okay. I’m -- sorry.

FRANKIE
What are you watching?

SHAYLA
History -- Channel.
That Hitler was -- BAD-ASS.

EXT. FRANKIE’S BACKYARD - NIGHT
Dark and deserted at this late hour.
Frankie stands near the back door with Shayla,
who wears a hoodie over dress,
the hood pulled up over her head
and tied almost completely shut.

SHAYLA
I can’t -- see anything --

FRANKIE
Don’t worry. It’s just for a couple minutes.

Josh appears from around the corner of the house.

JOSH
Coast is clear --

FRANKIE
Great. You stay here, keep an eye out.

SHAYLA
Who’s -- that?

FRANKIE
A friend. He’s helping me -- move you.

SHAYLA
Hi -- friend.

JOSH
(uncomfortable)
Hey.

FRANKIE
Keep an eye on the windows next door,
and if you see anyone, give the signal.

JOSH
Okay. Just hurry it up, okay?
I don’t wanna get busted --

FRANKIE
(nods, then, to Shayla)
C’mon, let’s go.

He takes her by the arm,
and they walk toward the rear of the back yard.

Shayla moves slowly, stiffly, zombie-like.
They approach a big, old oak tree in a far corner.

SHAYLA
(looks up)
It’s -- BEAUTIFUL.

ANGLE ON --
A TREE HOUSE nestled fifty feet up
in the big, thick branches.

Quite large, and beautifully made.
It’s been there for awhile,
because it’s almost completely hidden.

FRANKIE
Gestures proudly.

FRANKIE
It’s something, huh?
Me and my dad built it
when I was a little kid.
(proud)
I designed it --

SHAYLA
I -- LOVE IT.

FRANKIE
Shhh. We don’t want to wake the neighbors --

INT. VITA’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Plain, simple. Surprisingly girlie.
And right now, dark.

Vita BOLTS UPRIGHT in her bed,
awakened by the noise.

She goes to the window.
Looks out. Sees Frankie and Shayla.

VITA
Frankie? Who’s that with him?

EXT. TREE HOUSE - NIGHT
We see a circular staircase next to the tree trunk.
Frankie guides Shayla over to the first step.

FRANKIE
Okay, here we go --

Shayla grabs the handrail.
Lifts her foot.

Tries to take a step,
but her muscle control is off.

SHAYLA
Can’t -- DO IT.

Franke squeezes around in front of her.
Offers his hand.

FRANKIE
Here. I’ll help you.

SHAYLA
(takes his hand)
Thanks --

He pulls her up.
They start slowly climbing the stairs.

VITA
Watches from her window.
Leans out to get a better view.

VITA
What the hell?

JOSH
Sees Vita. Starts freaking out.
Puts his hands together to make a bird call.
Blows into them.

JOSH
Coo, coo, coo --

FRANKIE
Hears it. Looks around.
Doesn’t see anyone.

His cell phone VIBRATES in his pocket.
He stops. Takes it out. Whispers.

FRANKIE
Hold on a sec.
(answers it)
What’s wrong?

JOSH
Looks up at Vita’s window.

JOSH
It’s Vita. She’s hanging out
her window watching you. The jig’s up.

FRANKIE
(looks)
I can’t see her from here.
What should we do?

JOSH
Hell if I know --

FRANKIE
Go talk to her. Distract her.

JOSH
I don’t know what to SAY --

FRANKIE
You’re smart. You’ll think of something.

JOSH
Too late.

FRANKIE
What do you mean too late?

JOSH
She just came out the back door of her house --

FRANKIE
SHIT.
(to Shayla)
C’mon, let’s go --

SHAYLA
What’s -- wrong?

FRANKIE
No time. C’mon --

He starts pulling her up the stairs.
Her feet find a rhythm,
and they start moving faster.

VITA
Stands in her back yard,
watching them climb.

VITA
Who’s that WITH him

Josh walks over to the hedge
at the edge of her yard.

JOSH
Hey, Vita.
What are you doing out here so late?

VITA
(turns and looks)
Josh? I could ask you the same question.

Josh’s eyes grow wide. Wheels turning.

JOSH
Uh, Frankie’s on a date.
I was the designated driver.

VITA
A DATE? Who with?

JOSH
New girl. Uh -- foreign exchange student.

VITA
(looks at the tree house sadly)
Oh.

JOSH
So, uh -- it’s late.
I gotta go. Have a good night.

VITA
Yeah. See you in school.

Josh nods quickly.
Then marches away. Freaked.

INT. TREE HOUSE - NIGHT
A surprisingly large room. Carpeted.
A futon in one corner.

A table and two chairs in another.
A small boombox.

A small love seat in front of a portable TV.
Half-size refrigerator.

The door OPENS.

In walks Frankie and Shayla.
She pulls down her hoodie.
Looks around. Squeals with joy.

SHAYLA
LOVE it. So -- CUTE.

FRANKIE
I thought you might like it.
(phone VIBRATES in pocket)
Hold on a sec --
(pulls it out, answers)
What’s up?
(listens)
Brilliant. Thanks.
See you tomorrow. Bye.

He CLICKS it shut.
Gestures to the couch.

FRANKIE
Have a seat. Take a load off.

Shayla smiles. Goes to the couch.
Sits demurely. Pats the cushion
next to her invitingly.

He grins. Sits down.
She take his hands in hers.
Leans in for a kiss.

SHAYLA
Love -- nest.

And they kiss.

IN THE WINDOW we see Vita’s face.
HORRIFIED.

OUTSIDE
Vita pulls away from the window.

VITA
(whispers)
Shayla? But she’s DEAD --

Room With A View

Happy Tuesday, horror kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 12 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, the local news reports on dead cheerleader Shayla Petrie's disappearance. Meanwhile, as science genius nerd Frankie Stein prepares to move Shayla to his tree house, he discovers to his horror that she's starting to remember things ...


INT. HIGH SCHOOL CORRIDOR - DAY
CAMERA pans across a row of lockers.
Stops at one.

Candles, flowers and pictures of Shayla surround it.
A banner reads WE MISS YOU, SHAYLA above a teddy bear.

A delicate, feminine hand
adds a BOUQUET OF ROSES.

INT. NEWS STUDIO - DAY
GRAPHICS FLY across the screen:
NEWS FOUR AT YOUR DOOR.

We see a PERT, FADED BLONDE ANCHORWOMAN
and a CHIPPER, DULL-LOOKING BLACK ANCHORMAN
seated at the news desk
fake-chatting with each other.
Shuffling papers.

ANNOUNCER (V.O.)
News Four AT YOUR DOOR.
(beat)
With Candy Sprinkle --

Candy looks up.
Gives a slight nod.

ANNOUNCER (V.O.)
And Kip Cartwheel --

Kip nods. Smiles briefly.
Cocks an eyebrow.

CAMERA ZOOMS IN on Candy.
Eyes bright with emotion.

CANDY
Welcome to News Four At Your Door.

Our top story tonight,
little Shayla Petrie,
a senior at Venison High,
was reported missing last night --

She stops. Tries to continue,
chokes back a muffled sob.

Kip sees this, nods,
looks into the camera.

KIP
Police have started a
county-wide search for the missing teen,
who was captain of the cheerleading squad,
and who was crowned 'Miss Pumpkin'
at last year’s Harvest Festival --

Candy shakes her head.
Recovers her composure.

CANDY
Law enforcement officials
won’t divulge any details
about their investigation,
and are still combing
the scene of her abduction for clues --

KIP
We take you now to investigate reporter
Del Dunn, at the crime scene.

EXT. OLD COUNTRY ROAD - CRIME SCENE - DAY
DEL DUNN (30’s), tall, thin, striking
with a brunette bob stands by
the side of the road in a
short, tight suit holding a mike.

She looks into the camera.
Eyes flashing. Nods.

DEL
Kip --

KIP
So, Del. What’s the skinny?
Have you rooted out
any intel for us yet?

DEL
Indeed, Kip.
Although Venison’s finest
haven’t given me squat,
this investigative reporter
has been sniffing out clues
like Andy Dick at a pharmacy --

KIP
That’s quite the colorful metaphor, Del.
So spill it. What did you find out?

DEL
(looks back and forth, then --)
Well, it seems that impressions
of two pairs of sneakers
were taken at the scene,
one of which has a unique marking
on the sole that should be easy to track -

INT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - BASEMENT LAB - AT THAT MOMENT
Frankie sits at his workbench
eating a sandwich watching the news.

His ears perk up. Looks scared.
Takes off a sneaker. Looks at the sole.

THE SNEAKER
Has the initials ‘FS’ carved in the bottom.

FRANKIE’S
Eyes go wide.

FRANKIE
Shit.

Shayla lies on her ‘bed’
leafing through a fashion magazine.
She looks up, quizzical.

SHAYLA
Did you -- say something?

FRANKIE
(eyes on the TV)
Shhh --

DEL (O.C.)
-- and that they believe
the culprits are,
believe it or not --
a pair of teenage kids --

Frankie turns it off. Exhales.
Looks at Shayla. Scared.

SHAYLA
What’s -- wrong?

FRANKIE
Nothing. Nothing --
(trying for normal)
So you ready for the big move?

SHAYLA
Can’t -- wait.
Room with -- a view.

FRANKIE
Great. You’re gonna love it.

Shayla cocks her head. Thinking.

SHAYLA
I’m starting to -- remember stuff.

FRANKIE
(scared)
Oh? Like -- what?

SHAYLA
I -- used to be -- cheerleader.

FRANKIE
(gulps)
R-really?

SHAYLA
And -- something else --

FRANKIE
Oh? Wh-what’s that?

SHAYLA
Boyfriend. But it’s -- not you.
Funny, huh?

PUSH IN ON Frankie’s face.
Freaking out. He swallows.

FRANKIE
H-hilarious --

Child's Play

Hey there, horror kids. You say you don't like Monday's? Well, here's something that'll take your mind off the blahs. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 11 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, small-town cop Chet Ordesky convinces big-city CDC agent Beck Driver to help with her investigation of the 'undead' rat. Meanwhile, science genius nerd Frankie Stein tells his best friend Josh about his big 'first date' with dead cheerleader Shayla Petrie ...


EXT. POLICE HEADQUARTERS - PARKING LOT - NIGHT
Beck walks briskly to her rental car.
Presses the auto-lock, THWIP.
Chet appears out of nowhere.

CHET
Ms. Driver -- ?

BECK
(startled)
Jesus fucking CHRIST.
You scared the SHIT out of me.

CHET
Sorry about that.

BECK
What do you want?
I’m tired and I want to go
back to my shitty hotel room,
get drunk and watch a porno.

Chet stares. Wow.
A real ‘big city’ girl.

CHET
I just wanted to --
offer my services.

BECK
Sorry, doll --
hate to burst your drool-bubble,
but you’re not my type.

CHET
Gosh, no -- I didn’t mean THAT.
I’m married, have a kid --
(beat)
I meant with the investigation.

BECK
Thanks, but no thanks.
I work alone.
(off his look)
No hard feelings, okay, champ?
I’m sure you need to go patrol the diner,
the pool hall -- maybe check on the sock hop.

CHET
Listen, lady -- I don’t know
what’s got your dander up,
but I was just trying to be helpful.
(meaningfully)
Small town folks won’t take too kindly
to big-city government agents
snooping around askin’ a lot questions --
(off her look)
Unless they have a little
local color with ‘em.

She narrows her eyes.
Wheels turning.

BECK
Okay. Tell you what.
Meet me here tomorrow morning at nine-sharp.
But you let ME do all the talking, okay?

CHET
(beaming)
Sure thing. Thanks. You won’t regret it.
You’ll see. We’ll make a great team.

BECK
(rolls her eyes)
I have no doubt about that --

CHET
You got it. My pleasure.

BECK
Oh. One more thing.

CHET
Sure --

BECK
What the fuck’s a ‘dander?’

INT. HIGH SCHOOL LUNCHROOM - DAY
The joint is packed with LOUD STUDENTS eating lunch.
Gossiping, laughing, each clique
hanging out at their own table.

Frankie and Josh sit alone
in a far corner.

JOSH
So how was your first date?
(beat)
No, wait. Don’t answer that.
I don’t want to throw up my Spagetti-O’s.

FRANKIE
(dreamy)
It was so romantic --
(sighs)
I think I’m in love.

JOSH
'In love?' With a dead girl?

FRANKIE
She’s NOT dead.
She’s -- different.

JOSH
Oh, she’s 'different', all right --

FRANKIE
The relationship is going well,
but we have a problem --

JOSH
A 'problem?' Like what? She’s COLD?
You have to keep her HIDDEN
because everybody’s LOOKING FOR HER?

FRANKIE
No, no, no.
She told me last night
she wants -- a view.
(off his look)
You know, a window.
She says the basement
makes her feel -- confined.

JOSH
(SNORTS milk out his nose)
No SHIT.

FRANKIE
C’mon, I’m serious.
I need you to help me move her
up into the tree house.

JOSH
No way. Sorry.
I’m done playing Igor --

FRANKIE
Aw, c’mon. Please?
I just need you to help me
do this one last thing, a
nd then I’ll never bring her up again.

JOSH
Well, that is unless she gets buried --

FRANKIE
Please, Josh.
You’re my best friend in the world.
You’re the only one I can turn to
in this dark hour of need.

JOSH
(sighs)
You know I’m not very strong --

FRANKIE
All I need you to do
is be my look-out.
No heavy lifting.
Just watch my back.

JOSH
What’s in it for me?

FRANKIE
My undying friendship?

JOSH
And -- ?

FRANKIE
I’ll give you my mint,
still-in-the-box
Spock action figure.

JOSH
AND -- ?

FRANKIE
My first edition X-Men,
volume one.

JOSH
Child’s play.

FRANKIE
How about -- my Xbox?

JOSH
Have one.
(realizes)
How about --
your Jenna Jameson fleshlight?

FRANKIE
My WHAT?

JOSH
C’mon. Cough it up.
You don’t need it anymore --

FRANKIE
What makes you think I have --

JOSH
You showed it to me
on New Year’s Eve when
we got drunk on apricot schnapps.

Pause.

FRANKIE
Oh, yeah --

JOSH
Just make sure it’s CLEAN, okay?

Push in on Frankie’s face.
Turning RED.

FRANKIE
Of course --

Love Nest

Hey there, horror kids. TG-Fucking-F. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 10 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, detective Chet Ordesky and CDC agent Beck Driver inspect the undead rat at the city morgue and reach a startling conclusion. Meanwhile, science genius nerd Frankie Stein has his 'first date' with dead cheerleader Shayla Petrie ...


INT. MORGUE - DAY
Cold, sterile. Right out of Quincy.

Beck and Ordesky stand next to the
MEDICAL EXAMINER, a tall, bird-like chap.

Wisps of white hair fleck a bald head.
Piercing eyes like steel.

MEDICAL EXAMINER
Most unusual.
We don’t usually handle animals.

He goes to a steel drawer.
They follow him.

He slides it open to reveal --
a tangled mess of blood, bones and fur
in a glass case marked ‘biohazard.’

BECK
Jesus. What HAPPENED?

CHET
I shot it, but it kept going at me.
I finally got the little fucker
by smashing it over the head
with my nightstick.

MEDICAL EXAMINER
I’ve never seen anything like it
in my entire career. It was dead --
but still moving around.

BECK
And you know that from examining
a tissue sample?

MEDICAL EXAMINER
Indeed. It died twenty-four hours
before the incident.

Chet looks at Beck.
Now notices how hot she is.

CHET
What do you think?

BECK
I don’t know. Could be a some
kinda zombie virus thing, or --
(thinks)
Someone brought it back to life.

CHET
Brought it back --

MEDICAL EXAMINER
To LIFE?

BECK
I need to run some tests on it.

CHET
This used to be such a sleepy little town.
Now all this crazy shit’s going on.

BECK
Oh? What else is going on?

CHET
The head cheerleader got run over
in a hit and run and was abducted.

BECK
(startled)
She was abducted AFTER she was killed?

CHET
Yeah. What? You look -- strange.

BECK
(hint of a smile)
If this means what I think it means --

MEDICAL EXAMINER
Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

CHET
WHAT? Tell me.

PUSH IN ON Beck. Eyes blazing.

BECK
We just might have a
modern-day Frankenstein on our hands --

INT. FRANKIE’S BASEMENT LAB - NIGHT
The sickly-sweet shag-carpet ‘soft rock’ sound of Bread’s
I WANT TO MAKE IT WITH YOU over --

Frankie and Shayla,
sitting at a small card table
finishing a candlelit dinner.

Frankie wears a sports coat.
Shayla, one of Frankie’s mother’s old dresses.

And tons of garish make-up, poorly applied.
She turns her head to look at something,
and the scarf that hides her
smashed-in skull slips off.

Frankie barely notices.

FRANKIE
So I said to Josh,
‘I said nitrate, NOT titrate.’

He giggles, pleased with his joke.

Shayla cocks her head.
Pokes at her food with her fork.

SHAYLA
I don’t -- understand.

FRANKIE
(slaps his forehead)
Silly me. I’m sorry.
Let’s talk about something else --
(notices she hasn’t eaten anything)
You don’t like fish sticks? I’m sorry.
I can fix something else --

SHAYLA
I’m not -- hungry --
(strange smile)
For food.

FRANKIE
Oh.
(alarmed)
What are you hungry for?
(low, to himself)
PLEASE don’t let it be blood --

SHAYLA
(goofy smile)
I’m hungry -- for you.

FRANKIE
Oh. Wow. Uh --
(clears throat)
Would you -- like some more wine?

He grabs his glass.
DRAINS it. She looks at hers.

SHAYLA
I’ve -- had enough.
It goes -- right to my -- head.

She clumsily stands up.
KNOCKS OVER her glass with a stiff arm.

It hits the cement floor and SMASHES.
She looks at the broken glass sadly.

SHAYLA
I’m -- sorry.
(looks at her hand)
Coordination -- off.

FRANKIE
That’s okay. So’s mine.

He gets up.
Takes her hands in his.

Looks in her eyes tenderly.
Starts singing along.

FRANKIE
'Life can be short or long,
love can be right or wrong -- '

SHAYLA
(smiles)
You’re so -- sweet.
(cocks her head)
You have anything -- more upbeat?

FRANKIE
Uh, yeah -- sure.

He goes to the mini-stereo.
Starts rifling through the CD’s.

Shayla starts shuffling over
to her makeshift ‘bed.’

SHAYLA
(sexy, robotic)
I’ll be -- waiting --

Frankie GULPS. Chooses one. Puts it on.

We immediately recognize the opening strains
of Frankie Goes To Hollywood’s RELAX (DON’T DO IT).

Frankie SPINS AROUND.
Throws up his arms --

FRANKIE
Hey-EY, uh-huh --

He JERKS AROUND like a madman,
singing along.

FRANKIE
'Relax, don’t do it --
when you wanna get to it --

Shayla sits on the bed,
watching him. Amused.

Starts to pull her dress up,
revealing the scars and injures
on the left side of her body.

A BULGE in his crotch starts GROWING.

FRANKIE
Oh, wow --

He pulls out his wallet.
Digs out an ancient condom.

Shayla sees it. Giggles.
TOSSES her dress to the floor.

SHAYLA
Don’t need -- THAT --
FRANKIE
(realizes)
Oh, right.

He goes over to the bed,
still moving jerkily to the music.

FRANKIE
'When you wanna come --
when you wanna COME -- '

Shayla grins lustily.
Reaches over. GRABS his crotch.

His body JERKS.
Face goes WHITE.

Shayla feels something.
Cocks her head. Looks at her hand.
Then at the stain on his jeans

SHAYLA
Already?

FRANKIE
Omigod. I’m SO SORRY.

SHAYLA
(brightly)
That’s okay. I’m -- used to it.
(looks around)
There’s no -- view.

FRANKIE
View?

SHAYLA
No windows.
(pouts)
I want -- a view.

Frankie stares at her.
Wheels spinning.

FRANKIE
Windows --

SHAYLA
Don’t you -- want me --
to be -- happy?

FRANKIE
Of COURSE I do --

He stares off into space thinking.
Goes to the stereo.

Shuts off the music.
Thinking. Then --

FRANKIE
I’ve GOT IT. It’ll be PERFECT.
(off her smiling face)
The TREE HOUSE.

SHAYLA
'Tree house?'

FRANKIE
Yeah.
(beat)
Can you say 'love nest?'

Nice Rack

Happy fucking Thursday, horror kids! It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 9 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, science genius nerd Frankie gets swept up into the media circus at school in the aftermath of head cheerleader Shayla Petrie's disappearance. Meanwhile, cops comb the crime scene for clues, and CDC agent Beck Driver arrives on the scene to check out the zombie rat.


EXT. SUBURBAN HIGH SCHOOL - FRONT LAWN - DAY
A horde of NEWS VANS are parked outside.
A few REPORTERS with CAMERA CREWS
are interviewing students.

A FAKE-SAD SHELLACKED HOTTIE REPORTER
thrusts a microphone into a
fat girl’s tear-streaked face.

FAKE-SAD SHELLACKED HOTTIE REPORTER
Did you know Shayla well?

FAT GIRL
No. But we all looked up to her.
She was so -- perfect.

FAKE-SAD SHELLACKED HOTTIE REPORTER
(nods, looks into the camera)
We still don’t know what happened
to little Shayla Petrie.
Perhaps it was an unhealthy desire
for perfection that
drew her to the dark side --

FRANKIE AND JOSH
Watch the hubbub
from the front steps.

JOSH
Geez. They’re like
vultures circling a fresh kill.

FRANKIE
That may be.
(beat)
But just wait until
I share my discovery
with the world.
I’ll be FAMOUS.

JOSH
You mean you’re
planning on TELLING everybody?

FRANKIE
Later. After I’ve finished
running some tests.
(beat)
And I -- sample the merchandise.

JOSH
You mean you’re gonna --

FRANKIE
Hey. There’s a first time for everything.

EXT. OLD COUNTRY ROAD - DAY
We recognize the spot where
Willis kicked Shayla out of the car.

And the curve in the road
where she was plowed over
by the hit and run driver.

But instead of being isolated,
it’s now a CRIME SCENE.

A gaggle of CRIME TECHS
search the area for clues.

In the background is the same media circus,
now behind barricades,
kept back by a handful
of UNIFORMED OFFICERS.

Chet talks to the CHIEF OF POLICE,
a pasty-fasted big fella
squeezed like a sausage into a cheap suit.

Meet CAPPY SIMS (50’s),
Venison’s low-rent version
of the high command.

CHET
He’s kind of a fuck-up, chief.
But I don’t think he had anything
to do with her disappearance.

CHIEF SIMS
But you said he acted 'kinda guilty.'

CHET
Yes, but not because of any foul play.
He wouldn’t admit that they’d been drinking,
but he told me she threw up
all over the inside of his vehicle.

CHIEF SIMS
We got an anonymous tip from someone
who said he liked to hit her --

An INTENSE-LOOKING TECH shouts out.

INTENSE-LOOKING TECH
We got BLOOD, chief --

Chet and Sims whip their heads around.
Start walking over.

CHIEF SIMS
Good job, Bronson.
Whattawe got?

Bronson points at a spot
on the side of the road.

BRONSON
We got tire tracks that show
that a vehicle screeched to a stop here --
(points)
And there’s traces of blood here --
(points)
And these marks suggest that
a large object was dragged --
(points)
Over here.
And see here where they stopped?
The body was moved.

CHIEF SIMS
Find any footprints?

INTENSE-LOOKING TECH
Yes, sir. We got some good ones. Sneakers.
Impressions are on their way to the lab.

CHET
What do you think happened?

INTENSE-LOOKING TECH
If you ask me, she was hit by a car,
then dragged off into another car
and taken away.

CHET
Jesus CHRIST.
Who the hell would do THAT?

CHIEF SIMS
That’s what we’re gonna find out, son.
NOBODY steals the body
of the head cheerleader in MY TOWN.
(mutters to himself)
That nubile, young flesh --

CHET
Of course not, sir.
(thinks)
Actually, uh --
I think they did. Sir.

CHIEF SIMS
Shut up, Heck. You know what I meant.
We’re gonna find the culprit, GOT IT?

CHET
Got it. Sir.

CHIEF SIMS
And I’m putting YOU
in charge of the task force.

CHET
ME? Sir -- ?

CHIEF SIMS
I want you to comb EVERY INCH
of this bucolic, suburban paradise
and FIND this monster.

CHET
Yes, SIR.

CHIEF SIMS
I want Mr. and Mrs. Joe Average Venison
to know that we’ll fucking HUNT DOWN
and BRING TO JUSTICE anyone who DARES
abduct OUR objects of lust and desire.

INT. VENISON POLICE HEADQUARTERS - DAY
The usual drab institutional joint
brought to you by the color puke.
Strange details scream out ‘built in the 70’s.’

A LARGE COP sits at the front desk
working a crossword puzzle.

Beck Driver MARCHES up to him briskly.

BECK
Excuse me --

LARGE COP
(eyes on the paper)
Gimme one sec --

BECK
Beck Driver, CDC,
here to see Officer Chet Ordesky.

LARGE COP
(looks at her)
What’s a five-letter word for 'fat?'

BECK
Obese.

LARGE COP
That’s IT.
(writes it down, looks up)
How may I help you?

BECK
Beck Driver, CDC,
here to see Officer Chet Ordesky.

LARGE COP
'Beck?' Like the musician?

BECK
It’s short for Rebecca.
(low)
I’m here about the rat --

LARGE COP
(makes a face)
Oh. That. You need to go to the morgue.
Downstairs. I’ll have him meet you down there.

Beck nods. Marches off.
Fat picks up the phone. Watches her.

LARGE COP
Nice rack.

In Blonde We Trust

Hey there, horror kids! Happy fucking hump day. You know what that means, right? It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 8 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, police detective Chet Ordesky interviews dead cheerleader's Shayla Petrie's boyfriend Willis Grubb about what happened the night she disappeared. Meanwhile, her classmates at school mourn their loss, and Frankie Stein reveals his chilling plans for Shayla ...


EXT. WILLIS’ HOUSE - NIGHT
Chet Ordesky stands at the door. RINGS the bell.
Looks at this watch. Sighs.

CHET
Somebody’s home.
The lights are on --

He RINGS again.
The door FLIES open.
Willis stands there.

WILLIS
Oh, hi -- officer.
Is everything -- okay?

CHET
It’s about Shayla.
Just have some routine questions.
Can I come in?

WILLIS
(suddenly worried)
Yeah, sure.

INT. WILLIS’ HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
Buck sits on the couch. Passed out.
Lights are out.

Some old movie plays
at a low volume on the TV.

WILLIS
(gestures)
Let’s go in the kitchen.

INT. WILLIS’S HOUSE - KITCHEN - NIGHT
Chet takes a seat at the small kitchen table.
Willis stands, fidgeting. Looks very nervous.
And more than a little guilty.

WILLIS
So what’s up?

CHET
We got a call from Shayla’s parents.
She didn’t come home for dinner tonight.

WILLIS
She didn’t?

CHET
Her parents said she was
with you after school. Was she?

WILLIS
Yeah. We were just -- hanging out.
Driving around, you know --

CHET
If you didn’t take her home afterwards,
where did she go?

Pause.

WILLIS
(carefully)
We had a -- a fight.

CHET
About what?

WILLIS
She -- puked all over the inside my car,
and I got mad and kicked her out.

CHET
And you just drove away?

WILLIS
Yeah.
(beat)
I was mad.
The truck is almost BRAND-NEW,
and now it smells like --

CHET
Where did you drop her off?

WILLIS
Out by Old Country Road.

CHET
That’s not that far away.
She could have walked home.

WILLIS
I guess, yeah.

CHET
Were you drinking?

WILLIS
(face turns red)
During the day? Of course not.

CHET
Could you show us where it was?

WILLIS
Right now?

CHET
Right now.

PUSH IN ON Willis’ face.
Quietly freaking out.

WILLIS
Uh, yeah -- sure.

INT. SUBURBAN HIGH SCHOOL - CORRIDOR - DAY
Students stream down the hallway carrying books.
Most of them looks sad, in shock, lost.

A pair of STONERS stand
in front of the water fountain.

They sport the standard ripped jeans
and Metallica T-shirt uniform.
You can practically smell them on the page.

ACNE-SCARRED STONER
Dude. It’s 'The case of the missing snatch.'
What do you think happened to her?

FRIZZY-HAIRED STONER
I dunno. It’s a loss to humanity, bro.
That was some righteous pink taco.

ACNE-SCARRED STONER
(nods solemnly)
In blonde we trust.

CAMERA finds a group of NERDS
huddling around a locker.

BIG GLASSES NERD
She was swallowed into
a space-time continuum, I tell you.

AFRICAN-AMERICAN NERD
God, are you stupid.
She probably just ran away from home
or something.

BALD NERD
Maybe she got KIDNAPPED
and sold into white slavery.

BIG GLASSES NERD
Maybe she got sucked into a black hole.

AFRICAN-AMERICAN NERD
Who you calling a BLACK HOLE?

CAMERA WHOOSHES OVER to a pair of jocks
walking down the hallway. Heads hung low.
Trying to process the information.

RED-FACED JOCK
So -- is it still okay
to jerk off over her?

TALL JOCK
I dunno.
(thinks)
SHIT. What a waste of such hot snatch.

RED-FACED JOCK
Maybe I can dry-hump Peggy --
and think about her?

TALL JOCK
(high-fives him)
NICE --

They SLAP PALMS.

RED-FACED JOCK
Gone, but still jizzed-on.

CAMERA glides away.
Finds Shayla’s cheerleader friends

AURA and AMBER.
Teary-eyed, they hustle down the hall.

AMBER
I don’t understand.
Where did she GO?

AURA
I feel -- empty,
like when I got kicked off Facebook --

AMBER
Yeah. It’s like you texted someone,
and they didn’t text back.

They look at each other. SHRIEK.
RUN into the girls’ room.

CAMERA finds Frankie and Josh,
walking toward the exit.

JOSH
I dunno, Frankie.
Maybe we should confess.
It doesn’t feel right.

FRANKIE
Yeah, right.
And what are we supposed to say?
She’s dead, but I brought her back to life,
and she’s down in my basement?
That she looks pretty good
except that half her skull is caved in?

JOSH
I had bad dreams last night, Frankie.
I’m not sure if I can handle this.

FRANKIE
HANDLE this?
You HAVE to handle this.
She’s mine now,
and I’m not going to let her go.

JOSH
But she’s DEAD, Frankie. She’s DEAD.
What good is she to you like that?

FRANKIE
'GOOD to me?'
Tonight’s our first date --

Let There Be Life

Happy Tuesday, horror kids! It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 7 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, police officer Chet Ordesky interviews Brub and Adelle Petrie about their missing cheerleader daughter Shayla. Meanwhile, science genius nerd Frankie Stein is bringing Shayla back to life in his secret basement lab ...


INT. PETRIE HOME - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
Brub and Adelle sit on the couch.
Chet Ordesky sits across from them
on a big, overstuffed chair.
Jots down notes.

CHET
And you say she’s never late for dinner?

BRUB
NEVER. Our daughter is a model citizen.
She was PROM QUEEN --

ADELLE
(dabs her eyes with a tissue)
And the head cheerleader --
(sniffles)
We’re so WORRIED about her.

She HONKS on her tissue.

CHET
Oh, I know. I haven’t missed a game.
She’s -- lovely.
(beat)
My son’s the mascot --

BRUB
(stifles a laugh)
Your son is 'Chubby the Chicken?'
(serious)
You need to FIND her, officer, NOW.
Something TERRIBLE could have happened to her.

CHET
Well, we can’t file a missing persons report
until twenty-four hours have passed --

BRUB
But we can’t WAIT twenty-four hours --

CHET
Not to worry, Mr. Petrie.
I can still do a little
unofficial snooping around on my own.

ADELLE
Oh, THANK GOD. Thank you, officer.

CHET
(smiles grimly)
Please. Call me Chet.
(off her weak smile)
Is Shayla dating anybody right now?
That might be a good avenue to explore --

BRUB
Yes, she is. Willis Grubb, that low-life.
Crazy girl broke up with Dart Brock,
the football captain --

ADELLE
AND prom king --

BRUB
To go out with HIM.

CHET
I see.
(stands up)
Well, thank you for letting us know.
I’ll go check on Willis, and tomorrow
we’ll start our investigation.
Don’t worry, we’ll find your daughter,
dead or alive --

ADELLE
(BURSTS into tears)
DEAD or alive?

Brub GLARES at him.
CLENCHES his fists.

BRUB
GET OUT. Get out RIGHT NOW.
You’re upsetting my WIFE.

CHET
Ohmigosh, I’m so sorry.
I, I -- didn’t mean --
(beat)
I’m gonna go now.

He nods. Hurries out the door.
Brub rushes over to Adelle.
Tries to comfort her.

BRUB
Don’t worry, my little flower.
They’ll find her.

PUSH IN ON Adelle’s face. Now livid.

ADELLE
They fucking BETTER.
Hell hath no fury like a woman FUCKED.

INT. FRANKIE’S BASEMENT LAB - NIGHT
Shayla lies on a sleeping bag on the workbench.
All the blood has been cleaned off her.

She looks almost peaceful.
A scarf now drapes where
the side of her head was smashed in.

Wires have been attached
to various points on her body.

He attaches one on her right temple,
then her left. Done.

FRANKIE
Now it’s time to find out
if we have 'chemistry.'

He giggles. Goes to his laptop.
Starts PUNCHING commands on the keyboard.
Humming softly.

THE MONITOR
Shows the familiar graphs that read
HEART, LUNG and BRAIN.
Each read zero percent.

Frankie reaches over,
picks up GIANT syringe.

Much bigger than the one
he used on the rat.
He SQUIRTS it --

FRANKIE
Sorry. This is gonna hurt --

And INJECTS IT into her neck.
Pushes the plunger all the way DOWN,
then quickly PULLS IT OUT.

He turns to the transformer.
Starts FLIPPING the series of switches.

It starts to HUM.
Frankie watches her intently.

A NEEDLE
On the transformer starts SLOWLY
moving from left to right.

FRANKIE
Watches it. Shakes his head.

FRANKIE
C’mon, c’mon --
(beat)
Fucking Radio Shack --

He TAPS the side of it.
The needle JUMPS into the red.

FRANKIE
We have LIFT-OFF.

Frankie FLIPS down the metal bar, and --

Shayla
Gets ZAPPED with electricity.
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

THE GRAPHS
Jump to ONE HUNDRED PERCENT.

FRANKIE
PUMPS a fist.

FRANKIE
Let there be LIFE.

Shayla’s body starts SHAKING.
Her body starts SMOKING.

She begins to VIBRATE.
Frankie watches, bug-eyed.

FRANKIE
C’mon, baby -- you can DO IT.

Shayla’s eyes OPEN.
She BOLTS UPRIGHT. Blinks.

Looks at Frankie quizzically.
Opens her mouth to speak.

FRANKIE
Shayla. You’re BACK.

SHAYLA
(slowly, with difficulty)
Who’s -- Shayla?

FRANKIE
YOU’RE Shayla.

SHAYLA
Don’t -- know --
(beat)
Shayla.

FRANKIE
You mean you don’t
remember who you are?

She stares at him.
Confused. Shakes her head.

FRANKIE
Do you remember anything?

SHAYLA
No. Who -- are you?

Frankie stares. Holy shit.

FRANKIE
I’m Frankie. Your boyfriend.

Shayla nods her head slowly.
Looks around the lab.

SHAYLA
Where -- am I?

FRANKIE
You’re back home.
This is where we live.

SHAYLA
(feels her head)
What -- happened to me?

FRANKIE
You were in an accident.
But now you’re okay.
You’re home now.

She nods slowly.
Looks like she’s about to cry.

Frankie starts taking the wires off her. S
he watches. Confused.

SHAYLA
Would you -- hold me?

Frankie gulps. Holy shit.
Takes her in his arms.

FRANKIE
Uh, yeah.
(under his breath)
Thought you’d never ask --

Forever And Ever

Hey there, horror kids. Happy fucking Valentine's Day. Had enough hearts and flowers? Then it's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 6 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, dead cheerleader Shayla's boyfriend Willis returns home after their date, feeling guilty about happened. Meanwhile, science genius nerd Frankie Stein and his friend Josh sneak Shayla's body down into his secret basement lab ...


EXT. SHITTY, RUN-DOWN HOUSE - NIGHT
On the wrong side of the tracks.
If there WERE tracks. The cheap seats.
Threadbare lawn. Grey picket fence.

Willis’ truck pulls into the driveway.
Parks.

INT. WILLIS FAMILY HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
Like carpet and drapes, it matches the outside.
Piles of pizza boxes, newspapers,
empty beer cans litter the joint.

Willis father BUCK (40’s), fat and sloppy,
sits in on the couch watching a ball game.
Wolfing down a TV dinner.

Willis walks in,
hides how drunk he is.

WILLIS
Hey, pop.

BUCK
(eyes on the screen)
Hey, kid.
You’re home kinda late --

WILLIS
I was hanging out with Shayla --

BUCK
Picked up some of those
Hungry Man dinners.
They’re in the freezer.
Help yourself.

WILLIS
Thanks.

He starts walking to the kitchen.

BUCK
Oh, and your mother called.
Said you could stay a few more days.
She’s gonna stay in Vegas awhile longer.

WILLIS
(over his shoulder)
Cool.

INT. WILLIS FAMILY HOUSE - KITCHEN - NIGHT
‘Bare bones’ would be a compliment.
Willis puts a TV dinner in the microwave.
Turns it on. Looks around guiltily.

WILLIS
(under his breath)
Fucking bitch --

INT. FRANKIE’S VOLKSWAGON - NIGHT
Frankie and Josh roll up Shayla
in a bed sheet.

Frankie looks at it.
Makes a face.

FRANKIE
Spiderman sheets?

JOSH
Shut up.
They’re from
when I was a kid.

FRANKIE
I bet you still
sleep on them.

JOSH
Fuck you.
C’mon. Let’s move it.
I don’t wanna get caught.

EXT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - SIDE YARD - NIGHT
Frankie and Josh carry Shayla’s body
around the side of the house
toward the back door.

INT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - BACK YARD - NIGHT
Frankie holds Shayla’s arms.
Lets one go.

Reaches for the knob
to the back door.
(looks around)
So far so good.
No one’s seen us --

JOSH
Thank god.
She’s fucking heavy.
Come on.

In the window,
a light TURNS ON
in the kitchen.

FRANKIE
Shit. DUCK DOWN.

They DROP Shayla.
Get down.

She hits the grass
with a THUD.

JULIE’S FACE
Appears in the window.
Looks around.
Shrugs. Disappears.

The lights SHUT OFF.

JONAH AND JOSH
Breath a sigh of relief.
Pick her back up.

JOSH
Jeez. Now I know
how Dexter feels.

FRANKIE
Enough wisecracks, Igor.
Let’s get her down
to the dungeon.

INT. FRANKIE’S BASEMENT LAB - NIGHT
Frankie’s set up a makeshift bed.
A piece of plywood on a couple of sawhorses.

Shayla lies on the
Spiderman sheets on top of it.

They both stare at her.

The left side of her head is normal.
Face still pretty.

But the right side has been s
mashed in and flattened.

And she’s pretty much
COVERED in blood.

JOSH
She doesn’t look
so good anymore, Frankie.

FRANKIE
Nonsense.
We’ll get her cleaned up,
maybe put a nice scarf
around her head.
She’ll be fine.

JOSH
It’s late.
I’m gonna split.

FRANKIE
(still staring at her)
Okay. Thanks for all the help.

Josh nods.
Starts for the stairway.

JOSH
See you tomorrow in school.

But Frankie’s entranced.
Ignores him.

JOSH
Be sure to wear protection.
(off his silence)
Whatever.

He leaves.

Frankie leans down
and kisses Shayla
on the cheek.

FRANKIE
You’re mine now.
All mine.
Forever and ever --

Are You Trying To Scare Me?

Hey there, horror kids! Happy fucking FRIDAY. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 5 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, we meet dead cheerleader Shayla Petrie's parents, Adelle and Brub, who are eagerly waiting for her to get home for dinner. Meanwhile, Frankie and Josh have just brought Shayla's body over to Frankie's house ...


INT. SUBURBAN HOME - KITCHEN
Suzy Homemaker’s dream come true.
A riot of stainless steel and beige
in the heart of suburbia. Top Chef, ahoy.

A WOMAN (40’s), pert, smiling, very attractive
is studiously cooking at the stove.

She tastes the sauce with a wooden spoon.
Mmm. Delicious. Got Milf?

Meet ADELLE PETRIE, Shayla’s mother.
The perfect wife, mother, bookkeeper,
maid, chauffeur. You know the drill.

ADELLE
(calls into the next room)
Dinner’s almost ready, honey.
Did Shayla get home yet?
I didn’t hear her come in --

MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Not yet.
You want me to call her on her cell?

BRUB PETRIE (40’s),
Shayla’s father walks in.
Tall and fit, with rugged good-looks.

Right out of a Sears catalogue.
I mean, could this family be
more perfect-looking or what?

ADELLE
I’m sure she’ll be along in a sec.
She’s NEVER late for dinner --

BRUB
(sniffs)
Gosh, honey.
That’s smells terrific.
Is that a new recipe?

ADELLE
How’d you guess?

BRUB
When it comes to your cooking,
I’ve got a 'nose for adventure.'

ADELLE
Oh, YOU. Do me a favor
and set the table for dinner?

BRUB
Of course, my love.
Anything for you.

They gaze at each other with undying love.
Brub suddenly SHITS HIS PANTS
with a ROAR OF FLATULENCE.

ADELLE
Jesus fucking Christ, Brub.
Get the fuck out of here,
you’re shitting up the KITCHEN.

BRUB
Don’t use that tone with me, BETTY CROCKER.
You want the belt again?

ADELLE
Oh, go ahead, Mr. Macho.
Why don’t you just fucking HIT me?
I told you to wear fucking Depends,
but NO -- Mr. Irritable Bowel
just HAS to ruin his new
five-hundred dollar SLACKS.

Brub glowers.
Storms over to the doorway.
Over his shoulder.

BRUB
I’m going to take a shower,
and when I come back,
dinner BETTER be served.
Capiche?

Adelle blinks.
Cocks her head.
Smiles brightly.

ADELLE
Sure thing, honey-bun.
Comin’ up in jiffy.

INT. FRANKIE’S VOLKSWAGON - NIGHT
Frankie drives. Mind reeling. Deep in thought.
Josh stares silently out the window.

JOSH
So where are you going to put her?

FRANKIE
In my basement lab, of course.

JOSH
Are you fucking KIDDING me?
That’s crazy. Your mom will find her.

FRANKIE
No, she won’t.
She's forbidden to go down there.
It’s my domain. It’s not just my lab,
it’s also my room, where I sleep.

JOSH
You’re going to sleep in the same room
as a DEAD BODY?

FRANKIE
She’s not going to be dead very long, Josh.

JOSH
Yeah. That’s what I’m AFRAID of.
You’re going to wake her up
and then put the moves on her.
That’s SICK.

FRANKIE
Now you’re talking crazy.

JOSH
Oh -- YOU’RE bringing a dead cheerleader
into your bedroom, and I’M crazy?

EXT. STEIN RESIDENCE - NIGHT
A small, plain four-bedroom colonial job
just like all the others on the street.
Frankie’s car pulls into the driveway.

INT. FRANKIE’S VOLKSWAGON - NIGHT
Frankie turns and looks at Josh.

FRANKIE
We can’t move her now.
We have to wait until my parents are asleep.

JOSH
WE?

FRANKIE
C’mon. I need your help.
We’re in this together.

JOSH
We ARE?

FRANKIE
You just helped me remove a dead body
from the scene of an accident.
If that’s not 'in this together,'
I don’t know what is.

JOSH
(sighs)
What time should I be here?

FRANKIE
Midnight.

JOSH
Should I bring anything?

FRANKIE
If you find your balls,
that might help.

Josh rolls his eyes.
Opens the car door.

JOSH
Very funny.

FRANKIE
Hey, come on.
I’m just messing with you.
Thanks for helping me out.
I owe you one.
You’re my best friend.

JOSH
Are you TRYING to scare me?

Motel Hell

Happy Thursday, horror kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 4 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, science genius nerd Frankie Stein and his friend Josh have followed his dream girl Shayla and her abusive boyfriend Willis to a sex motel to try and rescue her, but when she flees the scene after a big fight, things soon turn horrifically wrong ...


EXT. THE CAMELOT MOTEL - DUSK
A seedy, shitty adult motel
on the outskirts of town near a trailer park.

Frankie’s VW bus is parked at
the opposite side of the gravel parking lot.

JOSH
I’m cold, I’m hungry,
and I gotta take a piss.

FRANKIE
You can go if you want to.

JOSH
I’m not gonna fucking WALK home.
It’s too fucking FAR.

FRANKIE
Relax. They’re not gonna be much longer.
They both have to go home for dinner.

On cue, a motel door OPENS.
Shayla and Willis walk out.

Dishevelled, with that
‘just had sex’ look.
And a bit tipsy.

They look around,
make sure they’re not being seen.

Willis holds a bottle of Jack Daniels.
Takes a long swallow.

They both get in the truck.
It starts driving away.

IN FRANKIE’S VAN
Frankie starts the engine.

FRANKIE
Okay, here we go --

IN WILLIS’ TRUCK
Shayla grips her stomach.
Turns green.

SHAYLA
Stop the car.
I’m gonna get --

And she PROJECTILE VOMITS
all over the dashboard.

WILLIS
Fucking BITCH.
Look what you did to my TRUCK.
(reaches over, FLINGS open her door)
Get OUT.

SHAYLA
But, but --

Willis SHOVES her out of the seat.
She FLIES OUT the door.

IN THE VAN
Frankie and Josh see Shayla hit the pavement.
And Willis’ truck ROAR away.

Shayla stands up.
Shakes a fist. SCREAMS.

SHAYLA
You fucking ASSHOLE.

ON THE STREET
A DRUNK DRIVER comes
CAREENING around a corner.

Now that it’s getting darker,
he doesn’t see Shayla --
and CLIPS her with his front fender.

She FLIES into the air like a rag doll --
And HITS the pavement, THWUMP.

FRANKIE’S VW BUS
SCREECHES to a halt
beside her motionless body.

Frankie and Josh jump out.
Walk over.

Frankie gets down on his knees.
Takes her pulse.
Shakes his head sadly.

FRANKIE
She’s -- dead.

JOSH
Shit.
(beat)
We better call the cops --

FRANKIE
The COPS?
Are you fucking KIDDING me?

JOSH
What else could we --
(realizes)
Oh, no. No WAY.

FRANKIE
Way. It worked on the rat.
Now I want to try it on a human.

JOSH
This is SICK, Frankie.
You just want to be with her.
No WAY am I getting
involved in this.
We could go to jail
for a LONG time.

FRANKIE
Then we don’t get caught.
Now help me put her
in the back of the van.
(off his silence)
C’mon, don’t you want me
to go down in medical history?

JOSH
(sighs)
I’ll take the feet.
You grab her arms --

Jocks Gone Wild

Hey there, crime kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 3 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, science genius nerd Frankie Stein gets picked on by Willis Chubb, the school bully, and Shayla's boyfriend. But after he fights back and escapes, he sees that Willis is bullying Shayla, and decides to follow them ... and rescue her.


EXT. SUBURBAN HIGH SCHOOL - DAY
School’s out. Students leave the building
like a stream of ants.
Laughing and shouting as they walk.

EXT. SCHOOL PARKING LOT - DAY
Frankie and Josh walk towards Frankie’s car,
deep in conversation.

JOSH
But that’s CRAZY.
You can’t do that.
I’ve seen the movie.
It DOES NOT end well.

FRANKIE
Well, that’s because
he used body parts
from several people --
but what about
reanimating a whole person?

MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Hey, LOOK. THERE they are.
Don’t ask, don’t SMELL --

Reveal WILLIS GRUBB (18), big, massive,
captain of the football team,
and Shayla’s boyfriend,
with his cohort KIRK KIRK, JR. (18),
even bigger.

Jocks Gone Wild.

KIRK
And where are you two
love birds off to?

WILLIS
Wait. Don’t tell me.
They’re gonna Eat, Pray, Fuck.

He CRACKS himself up.
They high-five each other.

FRANKIE
I don’t know what the hell
Shayla sees in you,
you fat fuck.
You don’t DESERVE her.

JOSH
(whispers)
Frankie --

Willis’ face turns red.

WILLIS
I’m gonna fucking KILL you --

Frankie KICKS him in the balls.
Willis keels over in pain.

WILLIS
OW --

KIRK
You little SHIT --

Josh WHIPS OUT pepper spray
and SHOOTS it in Kirk’s eyes.

KIRK
(wiping them)
AH, my EYES, my EYES --

And Frankie and Josh TAKE OFF.

EXT. FRANKIE’S VOLKSWAGON BUS - CONTINUOUS
Frankie and Josh pile into Frankie’s van.
SLAM the doors.

INT. FRANKIE’S VOLKSWAGON BUS - CONTINUOUS
Frankie JAMS the car into gear.
Josh turns around and looks
out the back window.
Sees something.

JOSH
Wait. Hold on a sec --

FRANKIE
Are fucking crazy?

He starts pulling out
of his parking space.

JOSH
WAIT. It’s Shayla --

FRANKIE
What?

Frankie turns around. Looks.

EXT. SCHOOL PARKING LOT - CONTINUOUS
Willis SLAPS Shayla. GRABS her.
SHOVES her in his pickup truck.

SLAMS the door.
PEELS RUBBER out of the parking.

IN FRANKIE’S CAR
He looks at Josh.
Open-mouthed.

FRANKIE
The rumors are TRUE.
He DOES hit her.

Frankie HITS THE GAS
and drives toward the exit.

JOSH
What are you DOING?

FRANKIE
What does it look like?
I’m gonna FOLLOW them --

EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY
Frankie’s car tails Willis’ truck
down the street.

INT. FRANKIE’S VOLKSWAGON BUS - CONTINUOUS
Josh looks at Frankie.

JOSH
You’re fucking crazy.
What are you gonna do
when they get to
where they’re going?

FRANKIE
Rescue her.

INT. CENTER FOR DISEASE CONTROL - OFFICE - DAY
A cluttered office filled with
book shelves and filing cabinets.
Paperwork EVERYWHERE.

A tall, intense-looking SCIENTIST (40’s)
talks on the phone.

Meet REBECCA ‘BECK’ DRIVER.
No-nonsense. Could be great-looking.

If you look behind the glasses,
the hair up in a messy bun.
Smokin’ hot bod hidden behind Armani.

BECK
Don’t get me wrong,
I love Dustin Hoffman,
but OUTBREAK was ridiculous.
The virus was --
(sees something)
My other line. Hold on a sec --
(PUNCHES a button)
This is Beck --
(listens)
REALLY? How long had it been dead?
(listens)
I’ll be there as fast as I can.
(listens)
Of course.
Do you realize what this could MEAN?
(listens)
Got it. Bye.
(PUNCHES another button)
I’m back. You’ll never believe
what was just found in Venison, Ohio --
(listens)
A dead rat on the loose.
(listens)
Yeah. It was brought back to life.
(listens)
OF COURSE I’ve see REANIMATOR --

Already Dead

Happy Tuesday, horror kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 2 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, we meet Frankie Stein's next-door neighbor, Vita Heck, who's been in love with him since they were little kids. A little later, at school, we also meet Josh Bohner, Frankie's best friend -- and nubile cutie Shayla Petrie, golden blonde head cheerleader -- and Frankie's crush.


EXT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - DAY
Frankie walks out the door.
Starts walking over to his car,
a decrepit, old Volkswagon bus.

FEMALE VOICE (O.C.)
Hey, Frankie --

He turns and look, sees --

VITA HECK (16),
his next-door neighbor.

Your classic tomboy.
With a makeover she could be hot.

But with her pixie haircut,
glasses and overalls,
she’s not the stuff of teenage dreams.

FRANKIE
Hey, Vita. What’s up?

VITA
Finally fixed the motherboard.
Got two-hundred screaming gigs of POWER.

FRANKIE
(distracted)
That’s -- great.

He opens the car door.
Gets in. Starts the engine.

Vita walks over to the car.

VITA
A bunch of us are gonna play
Dungeons and Dragons tonight.
Can I pencil you in as a wizard?

FRANKIE
We haven’t played that
since we were kids --

VITA
I know -- I just thought --

FRANKIE
Sorry, Vita. Gotta go.
Don’t wanna be late for school.

VITA
Okay. Bye --

He nods. Puts the car in gear
and drives away.

She watches the car sadly
as it goes down the street. Sighs.

VITA
I’ve loved you all these years, Frankie Stein --
and now you don’t even know I exist.

EXT. SUBURBAN HIGH SCHOOL - DAY
Out of a John Hughes movie. Old and stately.
Manicured lawn. Manicured kids from good homes.

The joint’s abuzz with dozens of STUDENTS
on their way to class.

Frankie walks with his friend JOSH BOHNER (16),
small and intense.

Makes Christopher Platz-Mintz look macho.

JOSH
You mean it WORKED?

FRANKIE
Yeah. Then the little fucker ran away.

JOSH
Do you realize what this MEANS?

FRANKIE
That I’m a genius?

JOSH
(sees something)
Here come the archetypes.

A trio of CHEERLEADERS walk by.
Bathed in golden sunlight.

Two scoops of blonde times three.
They glide by the boys.

Frankie stares with unabashed lust.

One of them, SHAYLA PETRIE (16),
the head cheerleader,
glances at Frankie staring at her
as they walk by. Stifles a giggle.

Whispers to her friends.
They ERUPT in laughter.

FRANKIE
(sighs)
Shayla Petrie --

JOSH
I can’t believe you have
the hots for her.
She just LAUGHED at us.

FRANKIE
I don’t care. She’s perfect --

JOSH
But she’s so obvious.
The short skirt, tight sweater,
tons of makeup. Cliche much?

FRANKIE
(watches her go)
I know --

JOSH
(tugs on his sleeve)
C’mon, we’re gonna be late for chem lab.

They start walking inside.

FRANKIE
I would KILL to be with her.

JOSH
Careful what you wish for --

INT. SUBURBAN HOUSE - KITCHEN - DAY
Plain and ordinary, but comfy. Homey.

We hear SQUEALING and BANGING
from behind a closed door.

Dita’s mother PEGGY (30’s)
talks on the phone.
Looks freaked out.

PEGGY
Yes, I already called you,
I know that -- but nobody’s come yet --

DISPATCHER (O.C.)
(electronic)
You don’t need to call nine-one-one
more than once, Ma’am.
An officer should be there any minute.

PEGGY
Can they hurry it up?
It’s making such an awful racket --

The doorbell RINGS.

PEGGY
That must them. Thanks, bye --

She hangs up,
rushes out of the room to the --

FRONT DOOR
Where she opens it.

A UNIFORMED OFFICER walks in.
Young. Good-looking.
Trying very hard not to smile.

UNIFORMED OFFICER
Mrs. Heck?

PEGGY
Please. Call me Peggy.

UNIFORMED OFFICER
Peggy.
(nods)
Officer Ordesky.
You reported a wild, rabid
rat invasion?

Meet CHET ORDESKY (40’s),
small town peace officer.

A bit paunchy from living the good life.
Great with getting cats out of trees.

Never fired his weapon.
On purpose, that is.

PEGGY
Yes, I did.
Thank god you’re here.
Come with me. I’ll show you.

INT. SUBURBAN HOME - KITCHEN - DAY
Peggy and Chet stand in front of
the door to the basement.
The rat SQUEALS and BANGS
against the door.

PEGGY
I opened the back door
to take out the garbage,
and it ran in here like a
little devil and went down
to the basement.

CHET
Why didn’t you call
an exterminator?

PEGGY
Because it’s, uh --
(eyes wide)
Already dead.

Rat-Race

Hey there, crime kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

After many years of writing crime stories, I recently started trying my hand at horror films, the first of which, ZOMBIE & JULIET, is about to be made into a major motion picture. The most recent story, however, is FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, which I'm proud to present in all it's twisted glory.

In Chapter 1, we meet science genius nerd Frankie Stein, who is right now conducting a rather ghastly experiment in his basement lab with a dead rat ...


INT. SUBURBAN HOME - BASEMENT - NIGHT
Some cheesy 80’s hair metal ballad
plays on an I-pod stereo.

'If I Close My Eyes Forever,' indeed.

Your classic wood-panelled rec room.
Now a science lab STUFFED with a maze of equipment.

Seated at a workbench is FRANKIE STYNE (16).
‘Nerd’ would be compliment.

Think Michael Cera
divided by Jessie Eisenberg.

He looks at a dead RAT
lying on the table, recent roadkill.

Munches on Cheetos. Thinking.
He finishes the bag.

Crumples it up in a ball and TOSSES it.
Wipes his hands on his jeans.

Leans over, starts attaching
a series of electrical cables
connected to suction cups
on the rat’s head, chest, arms and legs.

Nods. Turns to a laptop.
Starts PUNCHING in data.

THE MONITOR
Shows a series of graphs that read
HEART, LUNG and BRAIN.

Each reads 'zero percent' below them.

FRANKIE
Smiles grimly.

FRANKIE
Rat-tastic.

He picks up a syringe.
SQUIRTS it. Looks at the rat --

FRANKIE
You’re going to feel a small pinch.

And INJECTS it.

Frankie then turns to a TRANSFORMER
that the cables are attached to.

He starts flipping a series of switches.
We hear a HUMMING sound.

A NEEDLE
On the transformer
starts moving from left to right.

It approaches the red zone --

FRANKIE
Nods. FLIPS DOWN a metal bar, and --

THE RAT
Gets ZAPPED with electricity. BUZZZ.

THE GRAPHS
All JUMP to ONE HUNDRED PERCENT.

THE RAT
BOLTS UP in the air.
LEAPS onto Frankie and BITES his arm.

FRANKIE
SHIT --

He GRABS a coffee mug off the table
and WHACKS him in the head with it.

The rat goes FLYING into the air
and lands on the floor.

Starts SCURRYING around,
SMASHING into stuff.

FRANKIE
(looks at his arm)
Kevlar. The gift that keeps protecting.

He watches the rat RACE
around the room.

Then realizes.

FRANKIE
Oh, shit --

It goes to the stairs,
starts FLYING up to the first floor.

He CHASES after it.

INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT
Total suburbia brought to you
by the color beige,
dimly lit by the light
coming from the various appliances.

The rat RACES through the kitchen,
followed by Frankie.

The rat BANGS around the room,
looking for an escape.

Frankie THROWS OPEN
the door to the back yard,
and the rodent FLIES OUT.

He SLAMS the door.
Exhales. Shakes his head.

FRANKIE
Talk about a rat-race.

FEMALE VOICE (O.C.)
Is everything okay, honey?

The lights FLIP ON.

Frankie’s mother JULIE (40’s)
stands there in her bathrobe.

Once a great beauty,
now a bit washed-out-looking.

But still appealing,
even fresh-scrubbed.

JULIE
I heard the door slam.
Everything okay?

FRANKIE
(nods)
I was coming in from the back yard.
The wind blew the door shut.

JULIE
What were you doing
in the backyard
so late at night?

FRANKIE
Uh -- I was --

JULIE
Never mind.
One of your experiments, right?

FRANKIE
Uh, yeah.

JULIE
Have a seat, boy genius.
I’ll fix you
a glass of warm milk.

Pause.

FRANKIE
Could I, uh -- get a beer?