Sunday, July 19, 2009

The Tricky Part About Being A Peeping Tom

So you're probably right now out for a Sunday ride in your convertible. Or maybe lounging by the pool. Or the beach. And your mind starts to wander ... to the dark side ... and you have this sudden urge ... That Killing Feeling ...

Screened a great one last night. Robert Towne's TEQUILA SUNSET, with Mel Gibson, Michelle Pfeiffer and Kurt Russell. Probably one of the hottest love triangles in cinema history. Mel's a retired drug dealer, who's got the hots for restauranteur Michelle, and hangs at her joint hoping to get the guts to make his move. Enter head drug cop Kurt, and his sleazy cohort played to perfection by J.T. Walsh. Seems J.T. wants to take down Mel, but since he and Kurt are childhood friends, Kurt protects him. But that doesn't stop him from bedding. Michelle.
What follows is one of the wittiest, classiest, and most elegant crime stories ever brought to the screen. As an extra added bonus, Raoul Julia shows up toward the end to give it a final bang. Two cocktals WAY up.

Onto today's joint from NOWHERE GIRL. Hold onto your balls, kids (or your rack, dolls), cause it's action-acked ....

INT. MANSION - LIVING ROOM -NIGHT
Kamal leads Cherry into the room,
where Hamad, the guards and Renny
are watching a ball game on the big screen plasma TV.

KAMAL
Hamad. Our package has arrived.

Hamad looks. Smiles. Gets up.
Walks over to them.

HAMAD
Very good. Excellent.
(gestures at the case)
May I?

CHERRY
You have the money?

RENNY
Sits in his chair watching the game.
Behind his back, we can see him loosening his ropes.

HAMAD
Cocks an eyebrow. Nods. Looks at Kamal.

HAMAD
Give her the money.

Kamal nods. Walks over to a table.
Grabs an attache case. Brings it over.
Sets it down on a chair near Cherry and Hamad.
Flips open the lid to reveal it’s STUFFED WITH CASH.

KAMAL
One million dollars. As promised.

Cherry’s eyes BUG.
She’s never seen that much money.
In a daze, she hands Hamad the briefcase.

He takes it. Sets it down. Opens it.
Sees the LCD DISPLAY.

HAMAD
It’s been ACTIVATED.
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

The next few moments happen in a BLUR OF SPEED --

RENNY’S
Ropes FLY OFF.
He GRABS the guards by their heads
and CRACKS them together.
SNATCHES their weapons.
SMACKS one on the head, THWUMP --
then the other, THWACK.

They GO DOWN.

CHERRY
GRABS the money.

HAMAD
GRABS Cherry.
Points his gun at her head.
CLICK.

KAMAL
Points his gun at Renny.
CLICK.

HAMAD (CONT’D)
(to Cherry)
What THE FUCK is going on here?
Is he with you?

CHERRY
Hell, no!
(to Renny)
Don’t shoot! I’m with the government!

She WHIPS out her gun.
Points it at the case.

CHERRY (CONT’D)
(to Hamad)
Let me the fuck go,
or else I’ll blow us all to kingdom come.

Hamad releases her. Looks around.
What THE FUCK?

RENNY
That’s really a -- n-nuke?

HAMAD
YES. And it’s going to go off in NINE MINUTES.

Renny’s eyes dart back and forth.
He licks his lips.

RENNY
I used to be Special Forces.
I can disarm it.

EXT. MANSION - FRONT YARD - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
Peeler watches the action through the window. Panicked.

PEELER
This doesn’t look good.

FEMALE VOICE (O.C.)
That’s the tricky part about being a Peeping Tom.

APRIL
Steps into view. Aiming her Sig Sauer.

PEELER
Oh, h-hi. I’m with Cherry,
the girl with the nuke, remember?

APRIL
Of course -- you’re the guy
that fucking handcuffed me.

PEELER
Sorry about that.

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