I'm gonna get right to the point today. It's Saturday, and I don't feel like getting up on my soapbox. On with the next installment from DAZED, BEAUTIFUL & BRUISED. Bruce Ball accidentally shoots a little snuff scene -- and then Sparkle Plenty interrupts him in a most dangerous fashion ...
INT. BALL’S PRODUCTION OFFICE - BASEMENT - DAY
The PRETTY MODEL we saw earlier testing for the beer ad
is now naked, gagged and tied to a chair.
A scrap of plywood across her chest.
Eyes screaming pure, animal terror.
Bruce frames the scene through a digital video camera.
The lamp. Move it just a little more.
DINA makes the adjustment.
This is gonna look so real.
(looks at the model)
I mean, check it out.
She really thinks she’s gonna die.
Shhh. Suspend your disbelief.
Dina goes to the table. Faces the bim.
BRUCE (O.S.) (CONT'D)
And -- action.
The statuesque beauty slowly removes her lux jacket --
Revealing an hourglass shape in a merry widow.
And a black leather shoulder holster.
She reaches behind, slides out the Magnum -- and takes aim.
The Model jerks against the ropes,muffled gagging screams.
By the power invested in me,
I now declare you to be a complete waste of human life.
You did not cherish, honor or obey -- anything.
You spent your days chasing fame, fortune and the almighty dollar.
I now sentence you to the swift end of a pathetic life.
You final gift to humanity will be this short film --
a sacrifice to the dark angel we pray to.
BANG. BANG. BANG.
CLOSE ON --
The model slumped over in the chair.
Bullet holes in the wood.
Blood seeping down her body.
Oh my god! Holy shit! Holy fuck! I’ve shot her!
You said we were using blanks!
stares in disbelief.
Then, the barest hint of smile.
We were -- I thought we were.
At least now we know it looks realistic.
Realistic? Realistic!? I just fucking killed someone!
A doorbell RINGS.
EXT. BALL’S PRODUCTION OFFICE - FRONT DOOR - CONTINUOUS
It’s SPARKLE. Looking more than a little cute
in overall shorties, platform clogs, hair in ponytails.
She presses the button again.
I’ll huff and I’ll puff, and I’ll blow your pants down.
IN THE BASEMENT
(goes to the door)
Calm down, calm down, calm down.
Stay here with the -- girl.
I’ll get rid of whoever it is.
Then we’ll come up with a plan.
That’s what you said on that shoot in Darfur.
IN THE FOYER
Sparkle confronts Bruce with her splendor.
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt anything.
No, not at all. I’m glad you came by.
We were just downstairs shooting someone.
Something. Shooting something.
Cool. You still wanna -- shoot me?
I do, I do -- but now’s not a good time.
This actress, is uh -- difficult, and --
Sparkle WHIPS OUT handcuffs --
and SNAP, click. Gotcha.
Pulls out a DERRINGER.
Aims, cocks it.
Tough toenails. Take me to your soundstage.
I’ve got a score to settle with you, mini-man.