Already Dead

Happy Tuesday, horror kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 2 of FRANKENSTEIN IN LOVE, we meet Frankie Stein's next-door neighbor, Vita Heck, who's been in love with him since they were little kids. A little later, at school, we also meet Josh Bohner, Frankie's best friend -- and nubile cutie Shayla Petrie, golden blonde head cheerleader -- and Frankie's crush.


EXT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - DAY
Frankie walks out the door.
Starts walking over to his car,
a decrepit, old Volkswagon bus.

FEMALE VOICE (O.C.)
Hey, Frankie --

He turns and look, sees --

VITA HECK (16),
his next-door neighbor.

Your classic tomboy.
With a makeover she could be hot.

But with her pixie haircut,
glasses and overalls,
she’s not the stuff of teenage dreams.

FRANKIE
Hey, Vita. What’s up?

VITA
Finally fixed the motherboard.
Got two-hundred screaming gigs of POWER.

FRANKIE
(distracted)
That’s -- great.

He opens the car door.
Gets in. Starts the engine.

Vita walks over to the car.

VITA
A bunch of us are gonna play
Dungeons and Dragons tonight.
Can I pencil you in as a wizard?

FRANKIE
We haven’t played that
since we were kids --

VITA
I know -- I just thought --

FRANKIE
Sorry, Vita. Gotta go.
Don’t wanna be late for school.

VITA
Okay. Bye --

He nods. Puts the car in gear
and drives away.

She watches the car sadly
as it goes down the street. Sighs.

VITA
I’ve loved you all these years, Frankie Stein --
and now you don’t even know I exist.

EXT. SUBURBAN HIGH SCHOOL - DAY
Out of a John Hughes movie. Old and stately.
Manicured lawn. Manicured kids from good homes.

The joint’s abuzz with dozens of STUDENTS
on their way to class.

Frankie walks with his friend JOSH BOHNER (16),
small and intense.

Makes Christopher Platz-Mintz look macho.

JOSH
You mean it WORKED?

FRANKIE
Yeah. Then the little fucker ran away.

JOSH
Do you realize what this MEANS?

FRANKIE
That I’m a genius?

JOSH
(sees something)
Here come the archetypes.

A trio of CHEERLEADERS walk by.
Bathed in golden sunlight.

Two scoops of blonde times three.
They glide by the boys.

Frankie stares with unabashed lust.

One of them, SHAYLA PETRIE (16),
the head cheerleader,
glances at Frankie staring at her
as they walk by. Stifles a giggle.

Whispers to her friends.
They ERUPT in laughter.

FRANKIE
(sighs)
Shayla Petrie --

JOSH
I can’t believe you have
the hots for her.
She just LAUGHED at us.

FRANKIE
I don’t care. She’s perfect --

JOSH
But she’s so obvious.
The short skirt, tight sweater,
tons of makeup. Cliche much?

FRANKIE
(watches her go)
I know --

JOSH
(tugs on his sleeve)
C’mon, we’re gonna be late for chem lab.

They start walking inside.

FRANKIE
I would KILL to be with her.

JOSH
Careful what you wish for --

INT. SUBURBAN HOUSE - KITCHEN - DAY
Plain and ordinary, but comfy. Homey.

We hear SQUEALING and BANGING
from behind a closed door.

Dita’s mother PEGGY (30’s)
talks on the phone.
Looks freaked out.

PEGGY
Yes, I already called you,
I know that -- but nobody’s come yet --

DISPATCHER (O.C.)
(electronic)
You don’t need to call nine-one-one
more than once, Ma’am.
An officer should be there any minute.

PEGGY
Can they hurry it up?
It’s making such an awful racket --

The doorbell RINGS.

PEGGY
That must them. Thanks, bye --

She hangs up,
rushes out of the room to the --

FRONT DOOR
Where she opens it.

A UNIFORMED OFFICER walks in.
Young. Good-looking.
Trying very hard not to smile.

UNIFORMED OFFICER
Mrs. Heck?

PEGGY
Please. Call me Peggy.

UNIFORMED OFFICER
Peggy.
(nods)
Officer Ordesky.
You reported a wild, rabid
rat invasion?

Meet CHET ORDESKY (40’s),
small town peace officer.

A bit paunchy from living the good life.
Great with getting cats out of trees.

Never fired his weapon.
On purpose, that is.

PEGGY
Yes, I did.
Thank god you’re here.
Come with me. I’ll show you.

INT. SUBURBAN HOME - KITCHEN - DAY
Peggy and Chet stand in front of
the door to the basement.
The rat SQUEALS and BANGS
against the door.

PEGGY
I opened the back door
to take out the garbage,
and it ran in here like a
little devil and went down
to the basement.

CHET
Why didn’t you call
an exterminator?

PEGGY
Because it’s, uh --
(eyes wide)
Already dead.