So Many Men, So Few Bullets In A Gun

Happy Friday, crime slicksters! It's once again time to take a trip to the dark side ... to a place where your darkest desires become violent acts of complete depravity, right here, at the coolest joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In today's chapter from NOWHERE GIRLS, agents Cherry Nation and April Street have been captured by black ops spook Honey Almond, deep in her underground lair deep beneath Mann's Chinese Theater in Hollywood, where they're shocked to learn Honey's big revelation ... (!)


INT. INTERROGATION ROOM - NIGHT
Steel-walled. Futuristic. Soft glowing light.

The girls fall into a plexiglass cube
in the middle of the room with a SLAP. Groan. In pain.

Standing nearby is Honey. And four ARMED GUARDS.
One on each side. The girls stand up, brush themselves off.

HONEY
Evening, ladies. So glad you dropped in.
(laughs)
Pun intended.

APRIL
Honey --

CHERRY
Almond.

HONEY
The one and only. At your disservice.

EXT. MANN’S CHINESE THEATER - AT THAT MOMENT
A pair of FBI TECHS drill holes into the sidewalk with lasers.
Max and Sunday watch, along side Grim-Looking Agent.

MAX
So how does it work?

GRIM-LOOKING AGENT
They’re drilling holes at a forty-five degree angle.
When they get to the lower foundation, they’ll then angle in.

He holds up a long, thin tube.

GRIM-LOOKING AGENT
This has a laser-camera at the end.
Can see through ANYTHING.

SUNDAY
Gives a whole new meaning to the term ‘deep stealth’, huh?

One of the techs turns and looks at them.

GRUFF TECH
I’m in the sub-basement.
Bring me the snake.

Grim-Looking brings it over.
Hands to Gruff Tech.

GRIM-LOOKING AGENT
Here you go.

GRUFF TECH
(takes it)
Thanks.

Gruff starts stuffing the tube into the hole.
Max looks at Sunday. Raises an eyebrow.

MAX
Give you any ideas?

SUNDAY
In your hat, buster.

MAX
Sorry. Didn’t mean to make an asp of myself.

SUNDAY
(shakes her head)
So many men. So few bullets in a gun --

INT. HONEY’S INTERROGATION ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
Cherry and April stand in the cube. Glare at Honey

APRIL
You’ll never get away with this,
the place is SWARMING WITH FBI.

CHERRY
What have you done with my FUCKING KIDS?

HONEY
Ladies, ladies, ladies --
is that any way to talk to your MOTHER?

Honey smiles. Starts pacing around them in a slow circle.

HONEY
Surprise --
(beat)
Of course I’m still a bit peeved
that you killed your FATHER --
(beat)
But I understand. He was an evil man.
(shakes her head)
Talk about a messy DIVORCE --

APRIL
Wait a minute. Let me get this straight --

CHERRY
My head is spinning.
You mean to say, you and SLEDGE --

HONEY
Are your parents, yes.
(beat)
We were young and poor,
and the bastard didn’t think
we could take care of you.
It was HIS idea to put you up for adoption.
I’ve been sick about it ever since.

APRIL
And you put us through all of this
for the same reason HE did --

CHERRY
(to April)
She wants us to WORK FOR HER?

HONEY
Well, of course. You two are the BEST.
I threw my top assassins after you,
and you came through with flying colors.
(beat)
Of course, the collateral damage
was a bit excessive, but worth it.
Assets are replaceable.
(smiles)
But you only have one family.

CHERRY
But why the thing with the White House?

HONEY
Well, let’s just say I have a
bit of an over-active imagination.
(stops, looks at them)
Imagine the possibilities.
With you two on board, the world is our oyster.
Just think of it -- mother and daughters,
hell-bent on world-domination.

APRIL
On what planet do you think we’d work for YOU?

HONEY
A planet where a nuclear device
is sitting in the Senate chamber
during a joint session of Congress?
(laughs)
Just kidding.
There goes that over-active imagination again --
(beat)
But seriously? What choice do you have?
Every law enforcement agency in the world wants you --
(beat)
AND I have your CHILDREN.
(beat)
Don’t you see? You have no choice.

Cherry and April’s heads SPIN.
They look at each other.

CHERRY
I want proof they’re ALIVE.

Honey shakes her head.
Wipes a tear from her eye.

HONEY
You don’t trust me. Your own MOTHER.
(beat)
Then I’ll give you some time to THINK ABOUT IT.

She PRESSES a button on the floor with her boot.
A trap door below them OPENS --
and Cherry and April FALL into the hole.