Going Rogue

Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. Are you ready to take another trip to the dark side? A trip to a place of unspeakable depravity? Then get your asses over to the coolest hardboiled pulp joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

Onto today's chapter from our spy thriller NOWHERE GIRL ...

When we last left the scene at the White House, the State Dinner had been hijacked by a pair of 'terrorists,' who we now discover are reality show 'actors', hired by some unknown assailant ...


INT. THE WHITE HOUSE - SITUATION ROOM - NIGHT
A SECURITY TECH (30’s) sits at a workstation,
punching buttons on a laptop. Stares at the screen.

ON THE MONITOR
We see in black the outline of Akyab’s body
swimming in a sea of grey wavy lines.
Red and orange smears show his internal organs.
The explosive packages glowing in acid green.

SECURITY TECH
The balls on that bastard --

He picks up a phone.
Dials a number. Listens.

INTERCUT WITH:

IN THE BALLROOM
Chief of Staff’s cell phone rings.
He touches his earpiece.

CHIEF OF STAFF
(whispers)
Yes?

SECURITY TECH
The explosives are FAKE.

CHIEF OF STAFF
You sure?

SECURITY TECH
Yeah.

CHIEF OF STAFF
Because if you’re wrong --

SECURITY TECH
Like I wanna die.

CHIEF OF STAFF
Okay. Just making sure. Thanks.

Chief of Staff points his finger at Akyab.

CHIEF OF STAFF
You sir, are a FRAUD.
(to The President)
I’ve just received word that the bombs are fake, sir.

THE PRESIDENT
Really?

CHIEF OF STAFF
Yeah, you know we can scan that shit.
(beat)
Sir.

THE PRESIDENT
(to Secret Service agents)
Take both of them into custody immediately.

Two agents GRAB Akyab by the arms.
Start cuffing him.

AKYAB
Wait a minute.
I was told this was being filmed.
Like Punked, you know?
I’m just trying to get my SAG card.

A pair of agents GRAB Vicki. Cuff her.

VICKI
You thought this was REAL?
We were told this was a new reality show.
I want to call my LAWYER.
(struggling)
OW. Careful with that, it’s a Cartier --

The two of them are hustled away.
Vicious-Looking Spook approaches The President.

VICIOUS-LOOKING SPOOK
We traced the call, Mr. President.
Special Forces are on their way. ETA is --
(looks at watch)
Two, three minutes.

THE PRESIDENT
Good work. Any intel yet?

VICIOUS-LOOKING SPOOK
Believe it or not,
the call was made by April Street,
one of our Homeland Security agents.

CHIEF OF STAFF
No shit.

VICIOUS-LOOKING SPOOK
She and her sister Cherry Nation work as a team,
if you might recall.

THE PRESIDENT
Ah, yes, how could I could forget.
‘The Asset Twins.’
Do you think they’ve gone rogue?

VICIOUS-LOOKING SPOOK
Hard to tell, sir.

THE PRESIDENT
Do Special Forces have orders to bring them in alive?

VICIOUS-LOOKING SPOOK
Certainly.
(smiles)
If they can --