Somebody Go Get My Rifle

Happy hump day, crime humpsters. Are you ready once again to visit the land that time forgot? A place where your darkest fantasies becomes sins of the flesh? Then pack up your favorite piece, and head over to the coolest joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

Onto today's episode of LITTLE GIRL BLUE, where we finally meet private eye Carrie Love's family ... her boozy, cranky mother Margo, her clean-cut brother Seth, and her 'evil stepmother,' Eva ... while Carrie races there with Blue Wonder safely under her wing, more than just the home fires are burning ...

INT. MARGO’S MANSION - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

A hospital bed has been set up in a corner of the room.

Margo lies on it with an IV tube in her arm.

The private nurse, LAYLA (25),

a lovely HISPANIC GIRL, adjusts the dosage.

MARGO

Do I really have to wear this fucking thing in my arm?

LAYLA

It’s a sedative.

It’ll calm you down.

Most people like it.

MARGO

What about food? Nutrients?

LAYLA

You’re not a vegetable.

You can still eat.

MARGO

Seth, could you go make me a sandwich?

SETH

Leans against the fireplace.

Wearily looks at his mother.

SETH

When I had dinner an hour ago

you said you weren’t hungry.

MARGO

You know I hate pizza.

I’d like turkey on wheat with mustard.

And bring me a fresh cocktail.

LAYLA

I’m sorry -- no alcohol.

MARGO

Not even a beer?

LAYLA

NO ALCOHOL.

(adjusts the drip)

How about this?

Margo’s eyes glaze over.

MARGO

Oooh. That’s -- nice.

Seth rolls his eyes.

Starts off for the kitchen.

The doorbell RINGS.

MARGO

Shit. It’s Lady Macbeth.

Somebody go get my rifle.

The doorbell RINGS again.

LAYLA

I’ll get it.

MARGO

No. Don’t let her in.

LAYLA

But that’s rude.

MARGO

Now you’re catching on.

Seth comes back in from the kitchen.

Hands Margo a sandwich

on a plate and a glass of milk.

SETH

I’ll get it. Chew slowly, Mom.

(under his breath)

Wouldn’t want you to choke.

MARGO

(to Layla)

I assume MILK is okay?

Seth goes to the door. Opens it.

In walks EVA LOVE (40),

Carrie’s father’s second wife.

Blonde. Blue-eyed. Aryan. Curvy.

No-nonsense.

A bit formal in a designer suit.

With a clipped German accent to match.

She rolls in her suitcase.

Rushes to Margo’s bed.

EVA

Margo, how are you feeling?

Are you alright?

Seth called me at the airport.

My heavens, all this tragedy in one family.

Poor Tad. He was such a bright young man.

And on the holidays. Tsk-tsk.

MARGO

Get the fuck out of my face, you witch.

(looks at the bag)

Back from another trip, I see.

Must be nice to travel so much.

EVA

I was closing up my apartment in Berlin.

MARGO

Oh dear, then I guess you

had to let the stormtroopers go.

Pause.

EVA

Seth. It’s so good to see you again.

My, you’re looking more and more

like your father every day.

SETH

Hi, Eva. Thanks for coming.

We’re so glad you could make it.

MARGO

(to Layla)

Everyone says he looks more like me.

An uncomfortable silence.

SETH

So, uh -- Carrie should be here any minute.

EVA

Splendid. It will be nice to see her, too.

MARGO

You talked to CARRIE?

She didn’t return MY call.

SETH

She’s working on a case, Mom.

You can’t exactly check your messages

when you’re rescuing someone from the bad guys.

LAYLA

Is she -- a cop?

SETH

She used to be.

Now she’s a private detective.

MARGO

After she was kicked off the force.

Pause.

EVA

Perhaps I should make some coffee.

How about it? Maybe with some brandy in it?

SETH

Sure. Great.

LAYLA

I’ll come help.

PUSH IN ON Margo.

She raises her arm with the IV drip.

MARGO

I’ll stick with what I’m having.