Bitch-Slap

Welcome to the working week ... back to the daily grind. So what's gal to do when she's stuck in a deadly, boring, 9-to-5 dead-end job? She gets her ass over to That Killing Feeling ... where she can get her daily dose of hardboiled action, courtesy of NOWHERE GIRL ...

Screened an interesting failure last night. Clint Eastwood in WHITE HUNTER, BLACK HEART. Based on the true story of John Huston during the making of THE AFRICAN QUEEN. Potentially fascinating idea, but the execution was ... just not good. Kinda dull, in fact. Clint was a bit stilted in a role that was overwritten. The dialogue was too ... arch. Still, it was fun watching him try to hunt big game in Africa ... for awhile. Story kinda dragged, and was just a bit ... dull. C'est la vie. One gun up for effort.

Hold onto your shorts, kids, because today we've got ourselves a hell of an action scene, courtesy of NOWHERE GIRL ... when April Street goes head-to-head with Cherry Nation ...


INT. POOL HOUSE - NIGHT
Cherry and Peeler sit on the couch
watching the rain coming down outside.
It’s letting up a bit.

PEELER
So what next.

CHERRY
Well, since our tour guide
got his fucking HEAD blown up,
I think I better call the terrorist dude and get directions.

Cherry pulls out her cell phone.
Tries to dial the number.
But the battery is DEAD.

CHERRY (CONT’D)
SHIT.

She FLINGS it against the wall -- CRACK.

CHERRY (CONT’D)
MOTHER-FUCKER!

PEELER
Hey, calm down. It’s okay.
(pulls out his phone)
You can use mine.

CHERRY
I can’t TAKE THIS ANYMORE.

Just then, the side door BURSTS OPEN
with a CRUNCH.
Splintered wood goes FLYING --
And April FLIES IN on the Vespa.

PEELER
Holy shit!

CHERRY
NOOOOOO!

Cherry SCRAMBLES to get her gun,
but April is TOO FAST.
She JUMPS off the scooter,
races over and TACKLES her.
Pins her arms to the floor.

Peeler JUMPS on top of April,
tries to pull her off Cherry.
April HEAD-BUTTS Peeler --
and he FLIES backwards,
blood POURING out of this nose.

April sits astride Cherry.

APRIL
I’m a federal officer.
You’re under arrest.

CHERRY
FUCK you.

APRIL
(SLAPS her)
What the FUCK were you DOING?
Did you really think you could get AWAY with it?
It’s a fucking NUKE.

CHERRY
Go fuck yourself, BITCH.

April takes out her gun.
Points it in Cherry’s face.

APRIL
Don’t fucking move.

She pulls out keys,
unlocks Cherry’s cuffs.
Looks at her.

CHERRY
Incredible. You could be my twin.

Peeler goes to the bar.
Gets a towel for his nose.

PEELER
So I guess we’re in a lot of trouble.

APRIL
Unlawful flight with a concealed nuclear device?
I would say so.

Peeler inches over to Cherry’s handbag on the bar.

PEELER
I would imagine that’s -- a lot of time in prison.

APRIL
Try life without parole.
(beat)
If not the death penalty for TREASON.

April gets off of Cherry. Stands.

APRIL (CONT'D)
Roll over. On your stomach.

CHERRY
Fuck you.

April KICKS cherry in the side.

CHERRY (CONT’D)
OW!

APRIL
DO IT. NOW!

A gun safety CLICKS.
PEELER Stands behind April.
Pressing it into the back of her head.

PEELER
I’m really sorry to do this,
but we’re not going to prison.

APRIL
Do you have any idea what you’re doing?
You’re just gonna make it a hell of a lot WORSE.
Drop the gun, and I promise you won’t get hurt.

PEELER
(JAMS it into her head)
SHUT UP.

Cherry gets up. Goes to April. GRABS her gun.

CHERRY
Okay, bitch -- give me your cuffs.

April does a slow burn.
Takes them out.
Cherry SNATCHES them.

CHERRY (CONT'D)
Hands behind your back.

Peeler steps away. Still aiming.
Cherry walks over,
CLICKS the cuffs on April.
Then SHOVES her on the couch.

CHERRY (CONT’D)
THAT’S for fucking KICKING me,
fucking BITCH.

APRIL
You’ll never get away with this.
The area is swarming with agents.

CHERRY
We’ll take our chances.
(to Peeler)
Ready to go?

PEELER
Yeah.

He goes over and gets the case. Hefts it.

PEELER (CONT’D)
Heavy.

CHERRY
It’s a fucking NUKE.
Of course it’s HEAVY.