Home Is Where The Heist Is

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 12 of BABY HEISTER, we learn that undercover cop Ray Stark is listening in on Doc Hazard and the heisters planning their next job. Meanwhile, Doc asks his granddaughter Kelsey if she's sure she wants to pursue 'the family business.' Then, wheelman Simon Leeds makes his move on Kelsey ...


INT. DESERT PALMS MOTEL - RAY’S ROOM - NIGHT
Ray sits at the desk, which now has
a rack of electronic equipment set up.

Listening on headphones. Smiles.
Lights a cigarette.

Pours himself a
tumbler full of scotch.

RAY
Thank you, Jesus.
(raises it in a toast)
Here’s eavesdropping at you, kid.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN - NIGHT
Kelsey and Doc lean against
the counter with fresh beers.

DOC
So what do you think?

KELSEY
Are you kidding?
It’s fucking cool.

DOC
I could tell by
the look on your face.
Soaking it all in.
(off her smile)
What part do you
see yourself in the game?
Muscle? Jugger? Driver?

KELSEY
I wanna do what you do.
Plan jobs.
Be the boss.

DOC
You take after Chelle.

KELSEY
I thought Griff
planned the jobs.

DOC
Oh, he thought he did.
(beat)
Cause Chelle let him.

Kelsey nods thoughtfully.
Sips her beer.

DOC
You sure you
still wanna do this?
Once you’re in,
there’s no going back.

KELSEY
I’ve never been more sure
of anything in my life.

Doc raises his
bottle in a toast.
Kelsey raises hers --

DOC
Home is where the heist is.

And they CLINK.

EXT. DOC’S FARMHOUSE - FRONT PORCH - NIGHT
Kelsey sits out on the porch swing.
Smoking. Slowly rocking back and forth.

Looking at the night sky. Thinking.

Simon comes out.
Lights one up.
Looks at her.

SIMON
Hey.

KELSEY
Hey.

SIMON
Mind if I join you?

KELSEY
It’s a free country.

He walks over.
Sits next to her.

SIMON
So why do you
wanna be a heister?
Good-looking bird like you?
You could have
anything you wanted.

KELSEY
You’re a smart guy.
See if you can
figure it out.

SIMON
Your parents?

KELSEY
He shoots, he scores.

SIMON
My father drove a lorry.

KELSEY
What’s a 'lorry?'

SIMON
A truck.
Didn’t fancy doing that.

KELSEY
What made you come here?

SIMON
I heard the streets
were paved with beautiful girls --

Chump Change

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 11 of BABY HEISTER, teenage wannabe bank robber Kelsey Hazard is on cloud nine when she gets to sit in on the planning of an armored car heist and rub elbows with professional heisters ...


INT. DOC’S FARMHOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
The gang sits around the living room
on couches and chairs drinking bottles of beer.
Except for Jo, having coffee.

Kelsey looks around the room.
Trying to hide her excitement.

DOC
So tell me about the job.

DUSTY
Armored car heist. Palm Springs.

RENO
Real sweet.

SIMON
Fat and juicy.

DOC
Who’s the point person?

DUSTY
You remember Freddie Fingers?

DOC
Yeah, unfortunately.
I thought he retired
after that dust-up in Reno.

DUSTY
So did he. But he recently
shacked up with this waitress --

DOC
Don’t tell me.
Some roadside diner?

DUSTY
Yeah. The job is her idea.
But it’s a good one.
It can work.

DOC
I don’t like it.
(looks at Kelsey)
Freddie’s not the sharpest knife
in the drawer.
And fucking the inside man
tends to cloud your judgment.
(looks at Dusty)
Tell me about the hash-slinger.

DUSTY
What’s there to tell?
She’s a waitress.
Tired of serving tuna melts
to truckers for chump change.

DOC
Tell me about the can.
What’s the gag?

DUSTY
It comes by once a week,
same time exactly.
Always parks in the same place.
Three guards take turns
going to the head.
Last one grabs coffees to go.
Then they split.

DOC
How long are they there?

DUSTY
Fifteen minutes, give or take.
And they always park
in the same spot. Always.
Like fucking clockwork.

DOC
How much dough?

DUSTY
This is the beauty part.
Every Friday, they transfer cash
to all the local branches
from the main bank --

RENO
You know, payday.

DOC
So it’s alot of cabbage.

RENO
Waitress says it’s gotta be
at least a million.

DOC
What time?

DUSTY
Seven-AM.

DOC
Still not sure I like it.
I wanna meet the soup jockey.

DUSTY
We’re one step ahead of you.
Already set it up.

DOC
Okay.
(looks at Kelsey)
You never meet the people
setting up a job WHERE the job is.
You don’t want the locals
to remember seeing you.

KELSEY
Got it.

DOC
(to Dusty)
Escape route or hole up?

DUSTY
Not sure.
We’ll defer to your expertise.
Outlying area is kinda open.
The desert interstate
kinda narrows your options.

DOC
Gotcha.
(to Kelsey)
There are three ways to finish a job.
First is you grab the loot
and take a pre-arranged
escape route that’s cool.
(beat)
Second is you hole up somewhere
until the heat dies down,
then split up the loot
and go your separate ways.

KELSEY
What’s the third?

DOC
Hide the loot, split,
then come back for it later.
Kinda tricky, but it’s good when
there’s not a good escape route
and no place to hole up.

Doc sips his beer. Eyes the men.

DOC
Who’s financing?

DUSTY
I am.

DOC
YOU are.

DUSTY
I need the job, Doc.
Had a bad run in Atlantic City.

DOC
(to Kelsey)
Every job has expenses. Transportation.
Weapons. Food and lodging.
And sometimes you need tech stuff,
explosives, whatnot.
(beat)
Usually you get an outside financier
to put up the dough.
They either get double it back,
or a percentage.
That’s the way I like to do it.
That way, nobody has
more at stake than the others.
(looks at Dusty)
But some people aren’t good
at managing their money between jobs.
(to Dusty)
You asking ace shares?

DUSTY
Nah. Even split all around.
Four shares.

DOC
You ARE desperate.

KELSEY
Ace shares means more money --

DOC
Yeah.
(to Reno)
What’s your situation?

RENO
I’m cool. Gone through about
half the scratch from my last job.
Don’t like my reserves to get below that --
(shrugs)
It’s a good job, Doc. You’ll see.

DOC
(nods at Simon)
And you two vouch for Jason Statham here?

DUSTY
Yeah. We’ve both worked with him.
Best wheelman I’ve ever seen.

RENO
Precision driver.

DOC
(to Simon)
Where’d you learn to drive so well?

DUSTY
Don’t you follow NASCAR?
Kid’s been in the country six months.
Already won five races.

SIMON
You make me blush.

Doc nods slowly.
Sips his beer.
Eyes them.

DOC
When do we meet Freddie Fingers
and Truck Stop Sally?

DUSTY
In a couple hours.
Told ‘em to meet us
at the Dairy Shack.
We can sit outside.
Have some privacy.

PUSH IN ON Kelsey’s face. Excited.

KELSEY
And ice cream --

One Lucky Frill

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Friday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 10 of BABY HEISTER, after finishing the day's training, teenage wannabe bank robber Kelsey Hazard and her grandfather Doc sit down to a big dinner, and then to Kelsey's surprise, a motley crew of heisters arrive and join them ...


INT. BARN - DAY - IN MONTAGE
We see Doc Kelsey doing a series of exercises.
Jumping rope. Push ups. Pull ups.
Jumping Jacks. Climbing a rope. Boxing.

Doc holds the punching bag as Kelsey
SLAMS IT with boxing gloves.
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP.

She’s drenched in sweat. Looks fierce.
Like a warrior. Doc BLOWS a whistle.

DOC
That’s enough for now.
Don’t wanna kill you.
(beat)
Yet.

Kelsey nods. Out of breath.
Doc checks his watch.

DOC
Let’s go get some supper.
Get somethin’ in yer belly.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN - DAY
A big spread has been laid out on table.
Burgers. Fried chicken. Pasta salad.
Mashed potatoes. The works.

Eves have been added to the table
so that more people can sit.

Jo is finishing setting
place settings for six people.

Doc and Kelsey walk in,
see the culinary explosion.

DOC
A meal fit for a king.

KELSEY
Why the extra chairs?

DOC
We’re expecting company.
Sit. Dig in.

Kelsey sits. Grabs a chicken leg.
Starts chewing. Starving.

KELSEY
What kind of company?

DOC
Surprise.

The doorbell RINGS.
Jo starts for the door.

JO
I’ll get it. Sit.

Doc nods. Takes a chair.
Starts filling his plate.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - FRONT DOOR - DAY
Jo opens the front door.
Revealing three HEISTERS, grinning.

RENO BLACK (30’s)
a stocky fireplug of gruffness nods.

RENO
Nice to see ya again, Jo.
We’re here for the free meal.

DUSTY VEGA (40’s), dark and slick,
a poor man’s Al Pacino nudges him.
Chewing on a toothpick.

DUSTY
You know Reno.
If food were the food of love,
he’d eat on.

SIMON LEEDS (20’s), tall and thin,
the rockabilly version of Jonathan Rhys-Meyers
shakes his head with mock-embarrassment.

SIMON
Please pardon the lowlife criminal element.
I’m embarrassed to be seen in their company,
but I’m afraid I have bills to pay.

JO
(charmed)
I don’t think we’ve met --

Simon takes her hand. Kisses it.

SIMON
Simon Leeds, at your service.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN - MOMENTS LATER
Everyone sits around the table chowing down.
Kelsey keeps sneaking glances at Simon.
Smitten, but hiding it. Sort of.

DOC
Kelsey here is learning how to be a heister.

RENO
And YOU’RE teaching her?
(to Kelsey)
He’s the master.
You’re one lucky frill.

KELSEY
What’s a 'frill?'

JO
Dame. Doll.

DOC
Broad. Bim.

RENO
Chippy. Chick.

DUSTY
Frail. Floozy.

SIMON
Twist. Tomato.

Kelsey BURSTS into laughter.

KELSEY
'Tomato?'

SIMON
We have our own patois,
like any other subculture.

DUSTY
(to Doc)
So -- is it okay
to talk about the job --
with her at the table?

DOC
Yep. In fact,
I’d like her to be IN on the job.

DUSTY
I’m not sure that’s such a --

DOC
I know what you’re thinking,
but hear me out.
She’s my kin.
We can trust her.

RENO
That’s true, but --

DOC
Think of it as on-the-job training.
I’d like her to observe every aspect
of planning the heist --
she just won’t DO the heist.

DUSTY
Highly unusual.

RENO
Well, if she’s not doing the job,
what could it hurt?

SIMON
He’s got a point.
(winks at Kelsey)
Be kinda fun
to teach a baby heister.

PUSH IN ON Kelsey’s face.
Blushing a deep red.

KELSEY
'Baby heister?'

Fast Cars And Big Guns

Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 9 of BABY HEISTER, retired bank robber Doc Hazard starts training his teenage granddaughter Kelsey on how to be a heister, first with grueling workout, then a lecture on the basics of putting together a team ... and then a little target practice.


EXT. RANCH - DIRT ROAD - DAY
The chainsaw-psychobilly zombie-foot-stomp
of Horrorpops’ THELMA AND LOUISE over --

Kelsey. Listening to the song on her I-pod.
RUNNING on the side of the road.

Pumping like a demon in the blistering heat.
Shorts and T-shirt soaked in sweat.
Fierce. Determined.

She passes a row of crops.
A big, old barn. Runs past a pond.

A guy on a tractor, who HONKS.
Hits the front drive. Runs up to Doc.

Standing on the front porch,
holding a stop watch.

She stops. Tries to catch her breath.
He hands her a canteen. Drinks greedily.
Then pours it over her head.

DOC
Not bad. Five minutes.
Pretty soon we’ll get it down to four.

KELSEY
You trying to kill me?

DOC
When the shit comes down,
you gotta be able to MOVE.
Heisting isn’t just fast cars
and big guns, girlie-girl.

KELSEY
Speaking of guns, when do I get to --

DOC
After breakfast. C’mon.
Let’s go chow down.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN - DAY
Kelsey and Doc sit at the rustic, wooden table.
Jo serves them a big meal of flapjacks,
eggs, toast, bacon and sausage.

Then sits and joins them.
Kelsey starts wolfing it down.

DOC
This looks great, Jo.

KELSEY
(mouth full)
Yeah, Jo --

JO
Don’t talk with your mouth full, Kelsey.
It’s not ladylike.

KELSEY
(swallows)
Sorry.

DOC
Okay. First lesson. Planning the heist.

(off Kelsey’s look)
Planning the job is the most important part.
If it smells bad, you walk away.
If it looks good, then you plan it out
to the smallest detail.
(beat)
Then you assemble your team -- the string.
You only work with people you’ve worked with before,
or people your colleagues can vouch for
cause they’ve worked with ‘em.
You NEVER work with someone
nobody knows. Ever.

JO
Except for 'the inside man', of course.

DOC
I was gettin’ to that.
(to Kelsey)
The inside man is someone who works
at the joint you’re gonna to knock over.
They usually come to you with the job.
Once in a blue moon you approach them,
if you’ve got something on ‘em.
(smiles)
I met Jo when she was the inside man on a job.

KELSEY
I didn’t know that. What was the job?

JO
Coin convention.
I was the roper on a long con
involving one of the dealers,
and then realized you could
take the whole shebang.

DOC
She noticed I was casing the joint --

PUSH IN ON Jo’s face.
Eyes dancing with delight.

JO
And the rest is history.

EXT. RANCH - FIELD - DAY
Kelsey and Doc stand about fifty feet away
from a wooden fence.

A row of empty beer bottles
have been placed on top of it.

Kelsey holds a Glock
in her right hand. Takes aim.

DOC
Move your feet.
They should be shoulder-width apart.

KELSEY
Okay --

She makes the adjustment.

DOC
Now put your right foot out a little bit.
(off her look)
You’re right-handed.

Kelsey nods. Moves it.

DOC
When you take aim,
close your left eye a little bit.

KELSEY
Okay.

DOC
And make sure your arm
is almost completely straight.
(watches her do it)
Now lean forward a little bit.

She does. Doc nods.

DOC (CONT’D)
Let ‘er rip.

Kelsey FIRES, BANG.
The bullet goes WHIZZING above the bottle. THWIP.
It FLIES through foliage behind the fence.

The recoil makes her JUMP.
She rubs her wrist.

KELSEY
Ow.

DOC
Got quite a kick, huh?
Better use a two-handed grip
until you get used to it.

Kelsey puts her left hand
around her right. Grips it tightly.

DOC (CONT’D)
That’s right. Just like in the movies.
(watches)
Make sure both thumbs point forward.
(beat)
Yeah. Like that. And hold it tight.

She takes aim. FIRES. BANG.
The bullet WHIZZES into the air.

KELSEY
Damn.

DOC
Relax. Take a deep breath.
Don’t pull the trigger. Squeeze it.
Think of it like an extension of your hand.
Squeeze it so slowly that you’re
surprised when it goes off.
(off her nod)
Take your time. Deep breath.

Kelsey takes a deep breath. Exhales.
Aims at a bottle. FIRES. BANG.
It HITS the fence. PING. Wood FLIES OFF.

KELSEY
SHIT.

DOC
No, you’re doin’ good --
(beat)
Make sure the front sight
is aligned in the notch of the back sight --
so that the top of the front is
level with the top of the back. Got it?
(off her nod)
Now focus on the front sight
and aim at the target.

Kelsey concentrates.
Moves the gun slightly.

DOC (CONT’D)
Take a deep breath --
and when you exhale, squeeze.

She takes a bead on a bottle.
Her body relaxes.

Takes a deep breath -- and FIRES. BANG.
The bottle EXPLODES. Glass goes FLYING.

KELSEY
God-DAMMIT.

DOC
How does it feel?

KELSEY
Like coming home.

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD - DAY
A black SUV is parked on the shoulder.

INT. SUV - DAY
Seated behind the wheel is Ray Stark.
Looking through a pair of binoculars.
He puts them down. Smiles.

RAY
Looks like the little girl can shoot --

The Big, Bad Wolf

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Hump Day. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 8 of BABY HEISTER, teenage wannabe bank robber Kelsey Hazard convinces her grandfather, retired heister Doc Hazard to teach her the tricks of the trade. Meanwhile, we learn that Ray Stark isn't who he appears to be ...


EXT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - FRONT PORCH - NIGHT
Crickets CHIRP in the background.
The wind RUSTLES through the trees.

The front yard looks
ghostly in the moonlight.

Doc and Kelsey sit on the porch
with bottles of beer.

KELSEY
I keep seeing it happen
over and over again in my head.

DOC
It’ll go away after awhile.
It’ll happen less and less,
then just go away.
(beat)
Most of the time.

KELSEY
You ever killed someone?

DOC
Once.

KELSEY
What happened?

DOC
Fool kid tried a cross,
thought he could take the entire haul.
Was MUCH more careful about
who I worked with after that.

KELSEY
I didn’t even think.
I saw him, grabbed the gun -- and --

She sighs. Shakes her head.
Reliving it again. Sips her beer.

DOC
You know I care about you
like you were my own daughter, right?

KELSEY
I guess so.

DOC
I can’t believe I’m gonna say this --

KELSEY
What.
(realizes)
You MEAN?

DOC
Still wanna be a heister?

KELSEY
Hell, yeah.

DOC
Then I guess we better
get some shut-eye.
Tomorrow’s gonna be a big day.
Got alot to teach ya.

Kelsey LEAPS UP out of her chair.
Goes to Doc. HUGS him.

KELSEY
Ohmigod, THANK YOU, Doc.
I LOVE YOU.
(beat)
OHMIGOD. OHMIGOD.

DOC
Calm down, calm down.
Heisters don’t squeal
like little girls.

KELSEY
What made you change your mind?

DOC
Well, you got kicked out
of school the first day.
Fucked up your job the first day.
(beat)
But the way you handled that shotgun tonight?
Guess some things were just meant to be.

EXT. DESERT PALMS MOTEL - NIGHT
One of those old, ramshackle affairs
that were built back when people
still cared about character.

Flashing neon sign reads VACANCY.
COMPLETE COMFORT. POOL. FREE HBO.

INT. MOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
A sea of knotty pine and desert motif.
Ray lies in bed fully-dressed
watching an old black and white movie on TV.

Smoking. Sipping a bottle of beer.
The phone RINGS. He answers it.

RAY
Hello?

INTERCUT WITH:

INT. LOS ANGELES POLICE HEADQUARTERS - OFFICE - NIGHT
The small, dimly-lit office of an overworked,
underpaid robbery/homicide detective.

Piles of paperwork. File folders.
Document boxes on the floor.
Empty pizza box on a chair.

A tall, grey-haired COP
leans back in his chair,
talks on the phone.

Meet DARRYL ROOKER (40’s), fit.
In shape. Looks agitated.

Head of the special
‘Hazard Family’ task force.

DARRYL
It’s Rooker.
You sniff out anything?

RAY
Not yet.
The old man’s real slick.
Doesn’t trust me.

DARRYL
Why doesn’t that surprise me?

RAY
But I’ve gotta way to get close.
His granddaughter is staying with him.
Griff and Chelle’s kid.
(chuckles)
Wants to be heister.

DARRYL
No shit.

RAY
Yeah. Guess the apple doesn’t
fall far from the bank job.

DARRYL
How old?

RAY
Eighteen.

DARRYL
Hot?

RAY
Smokin.’

DARRYL
Careful. Keep your dick in your --

RAY
Don’t worry.
I’m not gonna fuck her.
I’m gonna USE her.
Get this -- she wants to be a heister,
but grandpa doesn’t wanna teach her.
So I offered to.

DARRYL
Watch out. You’re playing with fire.

RAY
But I gotta get close --

DARRYL
Yeah. But not TOO close.
They smell a rat,
and you’re history.
Doc Hazard is a legend.
Never been busted,
and he didn’t get that way
by letting an undercover dick
get too close.

RAY
Don’t worry. I’m being careful.

DARRYL
And stay away from the granddaughter.

RAY
From your lips to God’s ears.

They hang up.
Ray takes a sip of beer. Smiles.

RAY
Better watch out, little girl.
The big, bad wolf’s in town.

Breaking Bad

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 7 of BABY HEISTER, teenage wannabe bank robber Kelsey Hazard starts working at her job at the local convenience store, but when she gets robbed at gunpoint, the shit hits the fan ... and the ATM.


INT. STOP N’ GULP - DAY
Kelsey sits behind the counter.
Verne stands nearby showing her the ropes.
Beyond excited. Pointing out stuff.

VERNE
Now over there’s the baseball bat,
an over there’s the shotgun.

KELSEY
A SHOTGUN? Nice.

VERNE
You know how to handle one?

KELSEY
Of course.

VERNE
And remember, you don’t know
the combination to the safe.

KELSEY
You didn’t give it to me.

VERNE
I mean, in case someone
tries to rob you.

Kelsey nods. Blank stare.

VERNE
Well, that’s about it.
I’m gonna go to the bank, make a deposit.
(meaningfully)
I’ll come back and check on you later.

KELSEY
Gee. Can’t wait.

VERNE
I was thinkin’ -- when your shift ends,
how bout you and I gettin’ a bite to eat?

KELSEY
Oh, gosh. I can’t. I’m busy. Sorry.

VERNE
Another time. See ya later.

He tips his cap. Walks out the door.
The bell over the door JINGLES as he leaves.
Kelsey sighs. Lights up a smoke.

KELSEY
Thank fucking GOD.
(imitates him)
'How bout you and I gettin’ a bite to eat?'
In your dreams, fat ass.

The bell JINGLES. In walks Ray.
He sees Kelsey. Big grin.

RAY
Well, what have we got here?

KELSEY
Hey.

RAY
They let you smoke in here?

KELSEY
What does it look like?

He shakes his head.
Goes to the cooler.

Pulls out a twelve-pack of cheap beer.
Grabs some Slim Jims.

Brings them over to the counter.
Kelsey starts ringing them up.

RAY
You like working here?

KELSEY
What do YOU think?

RAY
Guess beggars can’t be choosers.

KELSEY
(looks at the register)
That’ll be twelve-fifty-three.

RAY
(hands her a bill)
Do any more thinking about my offer?

KELSEY
(takes it, counts out his change)
Doc told me to stay away from you.
Says you can’t be trusted.

RAY
You always do everything Doc tells you?

She stares at him.
Narrows her eyes.

KELSEY
Depends.

RAY
Ever shot a gun?
(off her blank stare)
Wanna learn?

KELSEY
(faint smile)
Hell, yeah --

RAY
What time you get off work?

KELSEY
Midnight.

The bell JINGLES. In walks Doc.

DOC
Thought I’d come by and see how --
(sees Ray)
I thought I told you to
STAY AWAY FROM HER.

RAY
Hey. I was just getting some beer.
I didn’t know she was --

DOC
Get the fuck out of here.
If I see you sniffin’ around her again,
there’ll be HELL to pay. You HEAR me?

OUTSIDE IN THE PARKING LOT
A shitty, beat-up puke green
Dodge Dart Swinger ROARS into the lot.
SCREECHES to a stop.

IN THE CAR
Sits a jittery young LOCAL KID (17),
all hopped up on meth.

Been up for days.
He pulls out a snifter.
SNORTS a bump. Then another.
Finishes a can of beer. CRUMPLES it.

Pulls out a small, shitty GUN.
Reaches up under his cowboy hat.
Pulls down a stocking over his face.

IN THE STORE
Doc gets in Ray’s face.

RAY
What are you gonna do,
old man? Hit me?

DOC
I tried asking you nicely.

The door BANGS OPEN.
In walks Meth Kid.

Sees Doc and Ray.
Starts waving the gun around.

METH KID
Everybody ON THE FLOOR.
This is a ROBBERY.

Doc and Ray raise their hands.

RAY
Okay, okay.
Just don’t hurt anybody --

METH KID
I said DOWN ON THE FLOOR, NOW.
DO IT. DO IT. NOW.

DOC
Easy now --

Doc and Ray start to get down -- and BANG.
Meth Kid’s head EXPLODES IN A RED MIST.
Blood and brains SPRAY the ATM.

KELSEY
Stands behind the counter.
Holding the shotgun. Surprised.

Quivering with adrenaline.
Staring at the body. In shock.

KELSEY
(whispers)
Holy shit.

DOC
You okay?

KELSEY
Okay?

RAY
She’s a natural.

DOC
Shut up.

The door JINGLES.
In walks a SHERIFF’S DEPUTY.

(20’s), young, eager,
a buzz-cut local kid.
The polar opposite of Meth.

BUZZ-CUT DEPUTY
(sees the body)
What the HELL?

DOC
Officer. That man
was trying to rob the store.
(nods at Kelsey)
And Kelsey here stopped him.

BUZZ-CUT DEPUTY
Well done, little lady.
(bends over, looks at the body)
Well, I’ll be. That’s Verne’s kid.

KELSEY
The OWNER?

DOC
What the hell?

BUZZ-CUT DEPUTY
Yeah. Verne reported him missing
a few days ago. Was on another binge.
(shakes his head)
Breaking Bad again --

Crazy As A Fox

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's cold and wet and rainy here at the beach, but I've got just the thing to warm things up -- because it's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 6 of BABY HEISTER, after teenage wannabe bank robber Kelsey Hazard gets expelled from school for beating the shit out of a bully, her grandfather makes her get a job, which REALLY pisses her off ...


INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - LIVING ROOM - DAY
Doc stares at Kelsey. Pointing at her.
Livid. Beyond upset.

DOC
God-DAMMIT, Kelsey.
How could you get expelled
ON THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL?

KELSEY
I told you.
It was self-defense.

DOC
You broke the kid’s NOSE.

KELSEY
He shoved me
UP AGAINST A WALL.
Called me a CUNT.

DOC
Then you cursed out
THE PRINCIPAL.
What the fuck, Kelsey?
What were you THINKING?

KELSEY
I told you.
I don’t WANNA
go to school.
I don’t BELONG there.
I wanna be a HEISTER.

DOC
We’ve already discussed this.

KELSEY
If YOU won’t teach me,
I found someone who WILL.

DOC
Oh? And who is that?

KELSEY
Ray Stark,
that guy at the wake.
Saw him again at
The Lounge last night.
Nice guy.
Offered to help me out.

DOC
I don’t trust him.
There’s something fishy about him.
Nobody at the funeral knew him.
I want you to stay away.

KELSEY
What if I say no?

DOC
If you’re gonna
live in MY house,
you stay away from him --
and get a JOB.

KELSEY
A JOB?

DOC
Well, if you’re
not gonna go to school,
you’re gonna have
to do SOMETHING.

KELSEY
What kinda job
can I get around HERE?

DOC
Drove by The Stop N’ Gulp today.
Saw a 'Help Wanted' sign.

KELSEY
The Stop N’ Gulp?
Are you fucking CRAZY?

DOC
Crazy as a fox, Kelsey.
(beat)
Crazy as a fox.

EXT. GAS STATION / CONVENIENCE STORE - DAY
A local filling station just off the freeway.
Been around forever, and looks it.

But the Stop N’ Gulp
next to it is a fairly new.

A sign reads
TWO FOR ONE BURRITOS.

Doc’s pickup drives in.
Parks in space right in front.

Kelsey gets out.
Looks at it with disgust.
Walks in.

INT. STOP N’ GULP - DAY
Some sappy country-and-western song
plays on an ancient boom box
behind the counter.

The usual rows of junk food.
Beer and soda behind glass cases.

Slurpee machine.
Tiny, shitty microwave
for heating up shit.

A small fan pushes around
the fetid air.

Sitting behind the counter
is VERNE (60’s), the manager.

Good ol’ boy from Louisiana.
Round, pleasant face. Big gut.

Right now he’s
reading a girlie magazine.
Eyes filled with lust.

A bell on the door JINGLES.
Kelsey walks in.

Walks up to the counter.
Leans against it.
Lowers her shades.

KELSEY
I’m here about the job.

Verne looks up. Holy shit.
He stares at her chest.

VERNE
Ever work in a convenience store?

KELSEY
Nope.

VERNE
Ever work a register?

KELSEY
I can learn.
How hard can it be?

VERNE
You’re hired.

Higher Learning

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Friday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In chapter 5 of BABY HEISTER,


EXT. CHAPARRAL HIGH SCHOOL - DAY
Blinding bright sunlight.
Gorgeous mountains in the background.

A quaint, Spanish mission-style building
on well-tended grounds.
The exact opposite of ‘urban.’

STUDENTS stream into the building,
excited, chattering with each other
on the first day of the new school year.
They’re mostly fresh-scrubbed crunchy-granola types.

Kelsey appears at end of the walkway.
Looks out of place in her motorcycle jacket,
black jeans and boots.

She sighs. Stomps out her smoke.
Starts walking toward the building.

INT. CLASSROOM - DAY
A bright, nicely appointed classroom
filled with kids.

WELCOME BACK is written on the green blackboard
in white chalk in perfect cursive lettering. An omen.

MRS. POTTS (50’s), the teacher,
is a plump earth mother of the desert.

And she’s got the Native American jewelry to prove it.
Not to mention the ‘dream catcher’ earrings.

MRS. POTTS
Good MORNING, class.
Welcome back to Chaparral High.
I know you’re all really excited
to be back for your senior year --

The door BANGS OPEN.
In walks Kelsey. Sullen.

Still wearing her shades.
She walks over. Hands Mrs. Potts a slip of paper.

MRS. POTTS
(reads it)
Ah, yes --
(to the class)
Everyone, this is Kelsey Hazard.
She’s just transferred here from Venice Beach.
I hope you’ll all make her feel real welcome.
(to Kelsey)
Why don’t you find a desk
and make yourself comfortable, Kelsey.

She nods. Starts walking
toward the back of the classroom.

A PAIR OF JOCKS
Watch her. Whisper to each other. Snickering.
One of them sticks his leg out to trip her.

KELSEY
Sees it out of the corner of her eye.
Approaches his desk.

STEPS on his foot with her steel-toed boot.
LINGERS a moment.

RED-FACED JOCK
OW.

KELSEY
Whoops. Sorry.
You should be more careful.
Someone could get HURT.

She PRESSES her full weight down,
steps off, and walks to an empty desk.
Sits. Smirking.

Mrs. Potts sees this. Gets upset.

MRS. POTTS
Johnny Rodman.
Is that any way to greet a new student?
Shame on you. Apologize to Kelsey, RIGHT NOW.

JOHNNY
(sarcastic)
Sorry, Kelsey.

KELSEY
(under her breath)
Not half as sorry as you’re gonna be
if you fuck with me again.

MRS. POTTS
What was that, Kelsey? I didn’t hear you.

KELSEY
I SAID -- not half as sorry as you’re gonna be
if you FUCK with me again.
(beat)
He tried to fucking TRIP me.
What kinda bullshit is that?

MRS. POTTS
I don’t know what kind of language
you got away with at Venice High,
but NOBODY talks like that in MY classroom.
Do you understand?

Kelsey nods. Gives her a salute.

KELSEY
Won’t happen again.
(whispers)
Bitch.

A couple of BLAND-LOOKING CHEERLEADER TYPES
lean over. Whisper to each other. Sniff disapprovingly.

MRS. POTTS
Very well.
(takes a breath)
Okay. Homework assignment.
I’d like you all to write an essay tonight
about what you did on your summer vacation.
And then tomorrow you’ll read them aloud
in front of the class.
(beat)
Doesn’t that sound like FUN?

INT. HIGH SCHOOL CORRIDOR - DAY
Kelsey walks down the corridor
weaving in and out of the stream of students.

Johnny Rodman and his HULKING FRIEND
appear in front of her. He SHOVES her.

JOHNNY
What the FUCK were you trying to pull?
Do you know who the FUCK I am?

KELSEY
(calm, cool)
Judging by your limited brain power, your attire --
and the fact that you’re a rude fuck,
I’d say you’re REALLY popular,
maybe even the football captain.

JOHNNY
Uh, yeah --

KELSEY
So let’s make a deal.
You stay the FUCK outta my face,
and I won’t fuck with yours.

HULKING BRUISER
Are you gonna let her GET AWAY with that?

A small crowd of students starts forming around them.

JOHNNY
WHAT did you say to me?

KELSEY
You heard me.

Johnny GRABS her.
SHOVES her up against a locker.

JOHNNY
NOBODY talks to me like that,
you fucking CUNT. GOT IT?

Kelsey sighs. Shakes her head sadly.

KELSEY
I warned you --

She grabs his hands,
THROWS them off her -- then,
almost faster than you can see,
she RABBIT-PUNCHES him in the face, SMACK.

He weaves a little.
Blood starts GUSHING out his nose.

JOHNNY
Uh --

Kelsey then POUNDS him in the stomach with a left,
then a right. He DOUBLES OVER in pain.

She reaches over. GRABS his hair.
Lifts his head. Looks him in the eye --

KELSEY
Hold on. Not quite done yet.

And KNEES him in the crotch.
He SQUEALS like an animal.
DROPS TO HIS KNEES.

Kelsey turns. Looks at his friend.

KELSEY
You want some?

HULKING BRUISER
Uh, no -- no.
(sees something)
Shit.

Just then THE PRINCIPAL (40’s) appears.
A really big fella. Beyond pissed off.
Face beet-red with suburban indignation.

PRINCIPAL
What’s going ON here?

KELSEY
What does it look like?
He was fucking with me,
so I fucked with him.

PRINCIPAL
There is NO FIGHTING in MY SCHOOL.
I want to see both of you in my office, RIGHT NOW --

Have Robbery, Will Travel

Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 4 of BABY HEISTER, Kelsey Hazard tries to convince her grandfather Doc to teach her how to rob banks, but he refuses. She storms off into the night and goes to the local dive bar ... where she runs into Ray Stark, who says he's 'worked with' her heister parents, and offers to 'show her the ropes' ...


INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
Doc sits in ‘his chair.’
Kelsey sits on the couch, next to Jo, asleep.
They’re watching a movie on TV, eating popcorn.

ON THE SCREEN
We see a scene from Stanley Kubrick’s THE KILLING.
A gang of MASKED THUGS are robbing a race track.

Then, a station break.
Some LOCAL CAR SALESMAN comes on,
hawking 'prices nobody can beat.'

KELSEY
Looks at Doc.

KELSEY
So how come you don’t want me
to be in 'the family business?'

DOC
It’s a hard life, Kelsey.
It’s no place for a young woman.

KELSEY
But what if it’s what I wanna DO?
(off his look)
Nothing you can say is
gonna make me change my mind.

DOC
Oh, is that right?
What about what happened to your parents?

KELSEY
They were careless. I’ll be smart.
It’s in my blood, Doc. My DNA.
If I had to be cooped up in an office
doing some meaningless shit,
I’d fucking shoot myself.

DOC
You think it’s noble, cool --
like in those books you read.
But it’s not. It’s a living hell.
I still have to watch my back.
Even though I'm retired,
there's always a chance that someone
will turn up from the past and cause trouble.
Someone who thinks they got a raw deal --
or wants to steal my stake.
And then there's the law.
Any day now some cop
could come snooping around --
and I’ve gotta live with
that the rest of my life,
always looking over my shoulder.

KELSEY
But if you did it
and my PARENTS did it, why can’t --

DOC
Because I’m your legal guardian now,
and while you’re living in MY HOUSE,
you’re gonna go back to school and get your degree.
Tomorrow morning Jo is taking you
to school and get you registered.
I want you to have the chance
that none of us had. GOT it?

KELSEY
But I don’t wanna DO that.
It’s not FAIR.

DOC
FAIR? LIFE isn’t fair.
Griff and Chelle are DEAD. Is THAT fair?
(looks at the TV)
Now hush up. Movie’s coming back on.

Kelsey scowls. Face a dark cloud.

EXT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - NIGHT
The house and the yard look spooky.
Ethereal in the moonlight.
A harsh desert wind whips through the yard.

The front door OPENS. Out comes Kelsey.
Rakish in her usual uniform.

This time with a slash of red on her mouth.
She walks over to Doc’s pickup truck.
Gets in. Drives off.

EXT. DIVE BAR - NIGHT
The kinda joint only the locals hang out at.

A row of motorcycles gleam ominously
under the dirty, old neon sign that reads LOUNGE.
Faint music bleeds out from within.

Doc’s pickup pulls in.
Finds a space. Kelsey gets out.

SLAMS the door.
Saunters toward the entrance.

INT. DIVE BAR - NIGHT
Dark and smoky.
The kinda place your momma warned you about.

BLUE COLLAR WORKERS, BIKERS
and other assorted riffraff.
A pair of BRUISERS play pool.
Kinda quiet on a Sunday night.

Kelsey sidles up to the bar.
Slides onto a stool.

The FREAKISHLY LARGE BARTENDER spies her.
Comes over. Smiles. Not a pretty sight.

FREAKISHLY LARGE BARTENDER
Whataya have?

KELSEY
Double shot of Kessler’s. Heinekin back.

He nods. Turns to get her poison.

MALE VOICE (O.C.)
I figured you’d be more of a
Jack and Bud kinda gal.

Kelsey, turns, sees --

RAY STARK
Sitting on the stool next to her.
Nursing a tumbler of scotch.

Eyes twinkling with mischief.
Or danger. Maybe both.

KELSEY
You’re the guy from the wake.

Freakishly Large serves her drink.
She slide over a bill.

He SNAPS it up in a meaty paw.
Lumbers over to the register.

RAY
'The guy from the wake.' Wow.
Nice to know I’m that memorable.

KELSEY
So I forgot your name.
Well, I’m SORRY, but when you just
went to your parents’ FUNERAL,
sometimes your MEMORY’S not so GOOD.

She grabs her shot glass.
POUNDS it. Grabs her beer.

Takes a big gulp. Turns around,
facing the other direction.

RAY
Hey, I’m sorry.
I was just busting your chops.
You had a stressful day.
Probably met a lot of corny,
old colorful criminal types.
I’d be cranky, too.

Kelsey turns back.
Narrows her eyes.
Is this guy for real?

RAY (CONT’D)
Let me buy you a round.
Make it up to you. No hard feelings?
(raises his drink, low)
One heister to another --

Her eyes flicker.

KELSEY
Okay.
(trying to be casual)
So you used to work with my parents?

Ray motions to the bartender for another round.
Pulls out a pack of smokes.
Lights one up with a CLICK of his Zippo.

RAY
Long time ago.
When they were first starting out.
Did a couple jobs with them.

KELSEY
Wow. Cool.

RAY
First and only time I worked
with a married couple --

KELSEY
What were they like to work with?

RAY
Total pros. Cool as cucumbers.
(sips his drink)
Is it true they never got caught --
until the last job?

KELSEY
Yeah. My grandfather, too.
(sips her beer)
He’s retired now.
But I guess you knew that.

RAY
(nods)
So I guess you’re now living with him --

KELSEY
Yeah. And it fucking sucks.
I asked him to teach me, but he refused.
He’s making me finish school.
I’d rather fucking DIE.

Ray’s eyes flicker.
He takes a long sip of his cocktail.

Takes a drag of his cigarette.
Squints through the smoke.

RAY
Maybe one of these days
I could show you a thing or two.

KELSEY
You mean it?

RAY
From where I sit, it looks like
you’ve already got your mind made up --
and nothing’s gonna stop you.

Kelsey smiles.
It lights up her face
like we haven’t seen.

KELSEY
Damn straight.
(beat)
Thanks, uh --

RAY
Ray Stark, at your service.
(beat)
Have robbery, will travel.

A Fine Filly

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Wednesday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 3 of BABY HEISTER, wannabe heister Kelsey Hazard attends her parents' funeral, who were killed trying to rob a bank ... where she meets a mysterious stranger who claims he 'worked' with them ...


EXT. CEMETERY - DAY
Very old. Some graves and crypts overrun with vines.
A pair of BLACKBIRDS sit on a tombstone, watching --

A FUNERAL in progress.
A cluster of MOURNERS DRESSED IN BLACK
surround a pair of freshly-dug graves.

Twin high-end CASKETS sit inside them.
Piled with bouquets of flowers.

Jo holds onto Doc, stoic,
both dressed in their Sunday finest.

Kelsey stands next to them.
Looks out of place in black leather,
denim and mirrored shades. Smoking.

The MINISTER (50’a) stands near the casket.
More than a few of the MOURNERS
look a little shady.

That’s because they are,
being Hazard family 'coworkers.'

CAMERA
Finds one of them,
standing off to the side.

Tall and dark. Like Kelsey,
wearing a black motorcycle jacket and shades.

Meet RAY STARK (35).
Think a RESERVOIR DOGS-era Michael Madson.
Tough-looking, with that air of danger.

He lights a cigarette with a
CLICK of his Zippo.
Blows a cloud of smoke.

KELSEY
Turns her head. Looks at him.
Then back at the caskets.

CLOSE ON --
Her face.
A tear slides down her cheek.

EXT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - BACK YARD - DAY
The joint is filled with MOURNERS from the funeral.

But now the mood is different.
It’s a traditional wake.
They’re laughing, drinking, reminiscing.

Jo walks around with a tray,
passing out snacks.

Doc stands behind the bar making drinks.
Ray slides up to the bar.

Lights up a smoke.
Looks at the crowd. Then at Doc.

RAY
Pretty good turnout.

DOC
I don’t think we’ve met.

RAY
(puts out his hand)
Ray Stark. You must be Doc.

DOC
(takes it, shakes)
What are you having?

RAY
What kinda scotch you got?

DOC
Johnny Walker Blue.

RAY
(nods)
Neat.

Doc nods. Turns,
gets the bottle, a glass, pours one.

Hands it to him. Ray takes it.
Takes a sip. Nods. Winces.

DOC
How did you know Griff and Chelle?

RAY
Worked together a couple of times.

DOC
Funny. Don’t remember
ever hearing your name.

RAY
It was awhile ago --

DOC
I’ve got a pretty good memory.

Kelsey sidles up to the bar
with an empty beer bottle.

KELSEY
Can I get another?

Doc nods. Grabs a bottle.
POPS it open. Hands it to her.

She takes a long slug.
Wipes her mouth with her sleeve.

RAY
You must be Griff and Chelle’s daughter.

KELSEY
Who wants to know?

DOC
This here’s Ray Stark.
Says he used to work with your parents.

KELSEY
You’re a HEISTER?

Ray makes a 'keep it down'
motion with his hand.
RAY
Careful. You don’t know
who might be snooping around.

KELSEY
Sorry.
(low)
What was it like
to work with my parents?

JO (O.C.)
Kelsey? Could you come help me?
I need to make some more pigs in a blanket.

Reveal JO.
Standing nearby with an empty tray.

Kelsey sighs. Looks at Ray.
Then Doc, who gives her a look.

KELSEY
Sure thing.

She finishes her beer.
Puts the bottle on the bar.

Follows Jo toward the house.
Ray watches her go.

RAY
That’s quite a fine filly.

DOC
She’s EIGHTEEN.

Ray smiles secretively.
Sips his scotch. Eyes flicker.

RAY
Looks more like her mom than her dad,
don’tcha think?

DOC
You stay away from her. Hear me?

RAY
Hold on there, cowboy.
If I didn’t know better,
I’d think you were threatening me.

DOC
Now you’re catching on --

There's A Riot Going On

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 2 of BABY HEISTER, Griff and Chelle Hazard rob The First National Bank of California in downtown Los Angeles, but their diversions start a riot. Meanwhile, their daughter Kelsey grills her grandparents about her family's secrets ... only to find them out in a most horrifying way ...


EXT. DOWNTOWN CITY STREET - DUSK
The armored car stops at a red light.

EXT. AERIAL VIEW OF LOS ANGELES - DUSK
All the lights in the city SHUT OFF.

INT. ARMORED CAR - DUSK
Zvi looks up from his laptop. Smiles eagerly.

ZVI
Let there be DARK.

IN THE FRONT
Griff looks out the window.
Sees the lights are out.

GRIFF
(into his headset)
Copy that, Eagle.
(to Gino)
Better get a move on.
Traffic’s about to clusterfuck.

Gino nods. STEPS on it.
They LURCH into the intersection.

IN THE BACK
Chelle nods at Zvi.

CHELLE
Commence phases two, three and four.

ZVI
Rockets red glare, coming right up.

His fingers start FLYING across the keyboard.

EXT. UNION STATION - DUSK
A giant EXPLOSION on the front lawn.

A GIANT CLOUD OF BLACK SMOKE
envelopes the building.
Pedestrians RUN, screaming.

INT. UNION STATION - CONTINUOUS
People inside SCREAM. DUCK for cover.

INT. POLICE HEADQUARTERS - DUSK
Complete bedlam. Officers answer phones.
Work computers.
Trying to get control of the situation.

FRONT DESK OFFICER
(on the phone)
I don’t KNOW if it’s connected.
Just send units to Union Station, NOW.

IN THE ARMORED CAR
Zvi looks at Chelle. Gives a thumbs up.

ZVI
Go Metro GONE.

EXT. CITY HALL - DUSK
An enormous EXPLOSION
rocks the front of the building.

A GIANT CLOUD OF BLACK SMOKE
starts enveloping the area.

ZVI (O.C.)
Just fought City Hall --

EXT. STAPLES CENTER - DUSK
A HUGE EXPLOSION rocks the front of the building
with a GIANT CLOUD OF BLACK SMOKE.
Pedestrians RUN and SCREAM.

ZVI (O.C.)
Swish.

IN THE ARMORED CAR
Zvi looks at Chelle. Smiles.

ZVI (CONT'D)
We have a trifecta.

EXT. DOWNTOWN LOS ANGELES - CITY STREET - NIGHT
There’s a RIOT going on. Complete mayhem.
LOOTERS smash windows.

RUN down the street with stolen goods.
A GANG-BANGER throws a MOLOTOV COCKTAIL
at a police car. It EXPLODES.

EXT. CITY STREET - NIGHT
The armored car turns a corner.

IN THE ARMORED CAR
Griff speaks into his headset.

GRIFF
Eagle, this is Houston.
Prepare for impact. Over.

IN THE REAR
Chelle nods. Speaks into her headset.

CHELLE
Copy that. Over.
(to the rest)
Buckle up. It’s gonna be a bumpy heist.

Everyone SNAPS on shoulder harnesses
that crisscross their torsos.

Pull their caps down over their faces
until they become ski masks.
One by one, they give a thumbs up.

EXT. BANK - NIGHT
The First National Bank of California.
A beautiful building.

Facade is two stories
of shiny glass and mirrors.

EXT. CITY STREET - NIGHT
The armored car pulls up in front of the bank,
looks like it’s going to park,
but instead makes a turn,
BUMPS over the curb -- ACCELERATES --
and starts HEADING RIGHT TOWARD IT.

IN THE FRONT
Gino and Griff slip on MOTORCYCLE HELMETS.

IN THE BACK
Everyone BRACES for the impact.

EXT. BANK - NIGHT
The armored car reaches the facade, and --
IN SLOW MOTION -- CRASHES THROUGH with a BANG.
Glass and debris go FLYING.

INT. BANK - NIGHT
BANK CUSTOMERS RUN for cover. SCREAM.
The armored car stops.

The doors FLY OPEN.
Everyone PILES OUT.
Gripping automatic weapons.

Griff blasts a SPRAY OF BULLETS
at the ceiling.

GRIFF
This is a ROBBERY.
Do WHAT WE SAY -- and NOBODY GETS HURT.
(looks around)
Got it?

Everyone nods, terrified.
Chelle spins around in a slow circle,
aiming her Uzi at them.

CHELLE
Everyone down on the ground, NOW.

ZVI
Sits down at a loan officer’s desk.
Flips open his laptop.

The emergency generator kicks in.
The lights TURN ON.

ZVI
That didn’t take TOO long.
(fingers work the keyboard)
Sorry, Charlie.
Only the real tuna
gets to be star-fucked.

And the POWER SHUTS DOWN.

ATLAS
Approaches the teller windows,
pointing his Uzi with one hand.

Duffle bag in the other.
Evil smile behind the mask.

He THROWS the bag at a
SCARED SHITLESS FEMALE TELLER.

ATLAS
No tricks, no dye-packs,
or you’ll DIE. GOT IT?
(of her terrified nod)
In the bag there’s more bags.
Give ‘em to the other tellers --
and start EMPTYING YOUR DRAWERS.

GRIFF
Waves his Uzi across everyone on the floor.

GRIFF
Which one of you is the manager?

A SHORT GUY WEARING A SUIT AND GLASSES
raises his hand.

SHORT GUY IN SUIT AND GLASSES
I am.

GRIFF
Let’s go take a trip to the vault.

ON THE STREET IN FRONT
A JAPANESE GANG ON MOTORCYCLES drives by,
bikes dripping with stolen loot.

They SCREECH to a halt.
Turn their heads.

JAPANESE GANG LEADER
Sees what’s happening.
Turns to his Second-In-Command.

JAPANESE GANG LEADER
Looks like our lucky day.

SECOND-IN-COMMAND
Me rob you long time.

They pull out AUTOMATIC WEAPONS
strapped to their backs.

HIT THE GAS and ROAR TOWARD THE BANK.

INT. BANK - NIGHT
Just as Griff walks Bank Manager past Chelle,
the gang SQUEALS into the bank
and starts FIRING at everybody.

Griff and Bank Manager get
SHREDDED TO RIBBONS.

Atlas and Zvi RUN.
Chelle gets HIT
with MACHINE GUN SPRAY.

Her body JERKS like a puppet
in a dance of death.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - NIGHT
Doc, Jo and Kelsey sit at the kitchen table,
the remains of dinner strewn about.
Having pie and coffee.

KELSEY
You can deny it all you want,
but I know the truth.
I found your scrapbook.

DOC
What scrapbook?

KELSEY
The one under your mattress.

DOC
What were you doing SNOOPING
around in my bedroom?

KELSEY
I was looking for your stash.
I hadn’t found a connection yet.
(big smile)
You were quite the heister.

Doc stares. Speechless.
The phone RINGS. Jo gets up.

JO
I’ll get it.
(answers it, listens)
Oh my god.
(turns and looks)
Doc?

DOC
What’s wrong?

JO
Griff and Chelle --

KELSEY
(turns white)
What.

JO
They’re dead.
(looks at Kelsey)
They were -- trying to rob a bank.

The Dirty City Of Angels

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

Some of you might have read THE HEISTERS here on the blog. It's the story of Kelsey Hazard, a forty-year-old, tough-talking professional thief (or 'heister' in the vernacular) who pulls off a big job, only to have someone steal the dough. The story goes back and forth from flashbacking to the robbery and then to the present, where she and her band of heisters try to figure out who robbed them. It's a cool story, if I say so myself.

And just like I did with Carrie Love, I fell in love with this character, and wanted to write another story about her. And then it hit me. How did a hot chick like Kelsey BECOME a heister? What was her family background like?

Here's your chance to find out. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Chapter 1 of BABY HEISTER, where we meet an eighteen-year-old Kelsey Hazard, and find out why she chose a life of crime.

Or did it choose her?


EXT. RANCH - DUSK
TITLE CARD READS: OJAI, CALIFORNIA 1990.
It’s magic hour in the desert.

The mid-summer heat shimmers
in rippling waves in the air.
The crops. The blacktop road.

A small ranch in a green valley.
Giant mountains behind it.
Can you say 'incredible view?'

Old, Spanish mission style house. Big barn.
Rustic pickup truck parked in the drive.

In the distance, a deep blue lake
glows in the fading light.

It’s picture-postcard time, folks.
Doesn’t get much more gorgeous
and idyllic than this.

EXT. LAKE - DUSK
A young WOMAN (18) lies on
an inner tube reading a book,
lazily floating on the water.

She takes a hit from a joint.
Holds it in. EXHALES.
Turns the page. Riveted.

Meet KELSEY HAZARD, tomboy deluxe.
Pretty, but she’s done everything
she can to hide it.

Her long, sleek black hair
tied tight in a ponytail.
Baseball cap. Shades. Bare lips.

The problem is the tiny bikini
she’s almost wearing.

Her killer figure undulates
around her tall, lean frame. Ouch.

A TALL, OLDER GUY (60)
walks out on the rickety wooden pier.

Meet DOC HAZARD, her grandfather.
Looks like your typical old cowboy.

Except for the Grateful Dead T-shirt
and biker boots.

DOC
Supper’s almost ready.

KELSEY
(eyes on the book)
Be right there.
Just let me finish this chapter.

DOC
(under his breath)
Goddamn crime novels.
If she’d only be as interested
in her school books --

EXT. LOS ANGELES - TEN FREEWAY - DUSK
Clogged with rush hour traffic
heading west toward the beach.

But not so much heading east
into downtown LA.

We see an ARMORED CAR
heading that way in sparse traffic.

It reaches an off ramp, turns,
then starts descending into
the dirty City of Angels.

INT. ARMORED CAR - DUSK
Behind the wheel sits GINO CONTI (30’s).
Wiry. Dark-haired. Dark-skinned.

He smiles, chewing on a toothpick.
Turns and looks at the HULKING BRUTE
sitting in the passenger seat.

GINO
Look at that sky. Beautiful.
In the cinema they call it 'magic hour.'

GUY
In my book, they call it 'money hour.'

Meet GRIFF HAZARD (40), heister extraordinaire.
And Kelsey's father.

Built like a block of granite.
Face like a potato.

Eyes burning with purpose.
Intense. Mouth a cruel dark slash.

GINO
You wrote book?
What is it about?

Griff stares ahead.
Silent. Watching the road.

IN THE REAR COMPARTMENT
Sits CHELLE HAZARD (39), Griff’s wife.
A gorgeous brunette.

Curvy goblet of sin poured
into a leather catsuit.

Armed to the gills. Packing, too.
She speaks into a headset.

CHELLE
Come in, Houston.
This is The Eagle.
Are we cleared for landing? Over.

GRIFF’S
Eyes flicker. Approach a smile.
Don’t quite make it.

GRIFF
(into his headset)
This is Houston.
Approaching our target in --
(looks at his watch)
T-minus two minutes. Over.

CHELLE
Smiles grimly. Nods.

CHELLE
Copy that, Houston. Over.

Sitting to her left is HELMUT WOLF (40’s),
expert marksman, German expat.
Dolph Lundgren, without the looks.

HELMUT
I still don’t like space travel names.
Is too silly.

CHELLE
That’s funny.
I don’t remember asking your opinion.

Sitting to her right is ATLAS DEMO (30’s),
medium-height, barrel-chested.
Jet-black hair. Third generation Greek.

ATLAS
Don’t listen to him.
It’s fucking genius.
Anybody hears us,
they don’t know what
the fuck we’re talking about.

ZVI ROZEN (20’s),
Israeli computer hacker extraordinaire.
Hunched over an old-school
briefcase-sized laptop. Looks up.

ZVI
(to Helmut)
You just have chip on shoulder
because you came in job late
because someone dropped out.
You should be GRATEFUL,
not ruining vibe.

CHELLE
Enough bickering.
We need to work as a team, GOT IT?

Helmut and Zvi glare at each other.
Reluctantly nod.

Zvi returns to his laptop.
Starts briskly typing out commands.

CHELLE
(to Zvi)
All set with the power grid?

ZVI
(smiles, gives a thumbs-up)
Like taking electricity from a baby.

INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN - DUSK
Right out of Norman Rockwell.
Enough knickknacks and quaint furnishings
to choke Martha Stewart.

Doc and Kelsey sit at the table
waiting for dinner to be served.

DOC
You do any more thinking
about going back to school?

KELSEY
Why the fuck would I do that?

DOC
Not having a diploma kinda limits
the kinda jobs you can get.

KELSEY
Not if I’m gonna be a heister.

DOC
A heister?
Where on earth did you --

Doc’s wife JO (60) approaches the table
with a big tray of food.

Once a great beauty, now a bit faded,
but still tough, with the twinkling eyes
of a con artist. Which she was.

JO
Dinner’s served.

She sets it down. Sits.
Doc and Kelsey help themselves.

DOC
Thanks, honey. This looks great.

JO
So how was your day, Kelsey?

KELSEY
Okay, I guess.

DOC
Kelsey’s thinking about
taking up a life of crime.

JO
Is that so.

KELSEY
If it’s good enough
for Griff and Chelle --

DOC
Now where did you get that idea?
Your parents are in sales.

KELSEY
(snorts)
Yeah, GUN sales --

Two Bullets, No Waiting

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Friday the 13th. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In the final chapter of LITTLE GIRL BLUE ... we reach the ultra-violent conclusion of our story, where ... well, hell. I'm not gonna spoil it. Read 'em and weep ...



EXT. MARGO'S ESTATE - BACK YARD - NIGHT
Carrie moves from tree to tree
on her way toward the pool house.

She sees Gero and Mad Dog.
Hears them shouting.

CARRIE
Here goes nothing.
(checks her gun)
Two bullets, no waiting.

INT. BASEMENT - SECRET ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
Tolly’s tied to a chair. Looks royally pissed off.
Eva holds a gun on him. Margo naps.

ANGLE ON:
We see that Tolly is
loosening the rope on his wrists.

EVA
Shakes her pistol at him. Eyes burning.

EVA
How dare you invade this home.
And on Christmas.
You should be ashamed of yourself.

TOLLY
Shut up, you OLD BAT.
You don’t know nothin’ about NOTHIN.'

EVA
Keep your voice down.
Can’t you see she’s sleeping?

Tolly stands up. RIPS the ropes apart.

TOLLY
I’M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU.

The noise wakes Margo.
She raises her gun.

Tolly LUNGES at Eva.
She SHOOTS him.

Gets him in the shoulder.
He STOPS, startled. LUNGES at Eva again.

Margo SHOOTS him three times in the chest.
BANG. BANG. BANG. He falls over, dead.

EVA
Oh my god.

MARGO
Holy shit.

They look at each other.

EVA
Nice shooting.

MARGO
(looks at the gun)
I can’t believe I just did that.

EVA
We should call Bernie on the walkie talkie.

MARGO
You call. I’m kinda tired.
(closes her eyes)
Nice shooting yourself.

EVA
You’re not such a tough nut after all.

MARGO
Keep it under your hat.
Now let me get some sleep.
My ears are still ringing.

And she goes out.
Starts lightly snoring.

Eva shake her head.
She picks up the walkie. Presses TALK.

EVA
Hello, Bernie? This is Eva. Are you there?

INT. POOL HOUSE - AT THAT MOMENT
Bernie lifts the curtain, peers out the front window.
Then looks at Seth and Blue, standing by the back door.
He nods. They quietly creep outside.

The walkie SQUAWKS to life.
Bernie answers it. Listens.

BERNIE
You WHAT? Really? Margo did? Holy shit.
(listens)
Stay where you are.
We’ll come get you. Hold on tight.

OUTSIDE
Gero and Mad Dog huddle by
the side of the front door.

MAD DOG
I say we blast the fucking shit out of ‘em.
I’m fucking FREEZING.

GERO
No. No guns. Let me think.

CARRIE (O.C.)
Gee, I dunno. That could be dangerous.

GERO
(looks)
What the -- ?

Carrie stands next to a nearby tree.
Points her gun at them.

CARRIE
Drop your weapons, NOW.

Mad Dog reaches for his piece.
Carrie SHOOTS him in the forehead.
BANG. He goes down. THWUNK.

Gero TAKES OFF, runs around
the side of the pool house.

Carrie CHASES after him.

CARRIE (CONT’D)
Goddammit, come BACK HERE.

IN THE WINDOW
Bernie watches.

BERNIE
Shit.

He opens the door. RACES outside.

OUTSIDE IN THE SECURITY CAR
Fish puts down the flask. Cocks his head.

FISH
That was a gunshot.
I better go help.

He opens the car door. Gets out.
Weaves a little.

FISH (CONT’D)
Damn. I need to eat somethin.’

And he heads off toward the house.

IN THE BACK
Blue and Seth creep around the corner,
holding their guns.

Gero RUNS right into them.
They topple over, HIT the ground.

Gero PISTOL WHIPS Seth. He GRABS Blue.

GERO
I’ve got you NOW, little girl.

Blue tries to FIGHT back,
but Gero GRABS her wrists in one hand.
Holds his gun to her head in the other.

GERO (CONT’D)
Hold still or I’ll blow your fucking head off.

CARRIE
Races toward Gero and LEAPS on top of him.
GRABS the gun from his hand. WHACKS him on the head.

Incensed, Blue JUMPS UP. Starts KICKING HIM.

BLUE
MOTHERFUCKER!

BERNIE
RUNS over. Sees what’s going on.

BERNIE
Stop her. She’s gonna hurt him.

CARRIE
Let her get it out of her system.

BLUE
You KILLED MY SISTER.

She continues to wail on Gero.
He raises his hands in protest.
Taking her full wrath.

Seth gets up. Shakes his head.
Brushes off the snow.

SETH
(watches Blue)
Whoah. Hell hath no fury.

BERNIE
(to Carrie)
I got a call from Eva.
You’re not gonna believe this --

CARRIE
Try me on for size.

BERNIE
You know the other goon?

CARRIE
That would be Tolly Chill.
The strip club manager.

BERNIE
Your MOTHER shot him. He’s dead.

CARRIE
Holy Oedipus complex.
(beat)
Guess I didn’t fall
far from the tree after all.

MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Nobody MOVE. Or I’ll --
(hiccups)
SHOOT.

FISH
Walks toward the group.
Gun aimed at Carrie and Bernie.

FISH
Let him go.

Blue pulls out her gun and SHOOTS.
Gets him in the belly.

A red stain starts forming on his uniform.

FISH (CONT’D)
You fucking SHOT me.
You’re just -- a GIRL.

She FIRES again. BANG. BANG. BANG.
Gets him in the head.
He falls backwards into the snow.

BLUE
Who you calling a GIRL?

She PUMPS a few more shots in him.
BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG.

BLUE (CONT’D)
MOTHERFUCKER.

BERNIE
Think he’s dead now.

CARRIE
Feels good, doesn’t it.

BLUE
It’s a start.

EXT. SUNSET BOULEVARD - PRIVATE SECURITY CAR - AT THAT MOMENT
A police cruiser pulls up behind the empty car.
Two UNIFORMED OFFICERS get out.
Walk over and inspect it.

HOT FEMALE OFFICER
(shines a flashlight)
Yeah. It’s empty.

Loud BANGING from the trunk.

GRIZZLED VET OFFICER
What the fuck?

Hot Female goes to the trunk. Opens it.

IN THE TRUNK
Lies Tip. In his underwear.
Trussed up like a pig. Shivering.

TIP
Officers -- boy am I glad to see you.
(weak smile)
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

INT. MARGO’S MANSION - DINING ROOM - DAWN
Some super-cool jazz rendition of a Christmas classic over --

The first rays of light stream in through the windows.
Carrie, Bernie, Seth and Blue sit at the large table.

Also seated are the two cops,
and Tip, bundled up in a blanket.

HOT FEMALE OFFICER
This is really nice of you.

GRIZZLED VET OFFICER
Yeah, thanks. Sure smells great.
(smiles)
We’ll take your statements after we eat.
Fuck the chief if he can’t deal with it.

HOT FEMALE OFFICER
Besides, the crime scene techs
have a lot of ground to cover.

Eva wheels Margo into the room
holding a huge tray of food.

MARGO
This’ll give you guys a start.
I didn’t have enough eggs for everybody --

EVA
So we improvised.

MARGO
Eva added MILK. And CHEESE. Brilliant.

EVA
Old German trick.

They start serving the food.
Everyone digs in.

CARRIE
(to Bernie)
About that -- thing that happened in the tunnel --

BERNIE
Never happened. Mum’s the word.
(hands her a plate)
Roll?

She takes one. Smiles. WOLFS it down.

BLUE
(to Seth)
So I was thinking --

SETH
(eating)
Yeah? About what.

BLUE
Well, if we could think of this
as our first date,
we could get it out of the way.

SETH
Get what out of the way.

BLUE
This.

PUSH IN ON Blue. She leans over.
Kisses him.

They fall into each other’s arms.

FADE TO BLACK

[COMING ON MONDAY -- BABY HEISTER]

The Pleasure's All Yours

Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 28 of LITTLE GIRL BLUE, it's the next-to-last chapter as we hurtle toward the exciting conclusion of our story, where Carrie Love and Blue Wonder are about to have their final face-off with Tolly Chill and his goons ...


INT. MARGO'S ESTATE - POOL HOUSE - NIGHT
Blue and Seth RACE in, followed by Bernie.
He SLAMS the door. Locks it.

Pulls out his gun.
Seth holds up his rifle.

BERNIE
(to Seth)
You cover the door.
I’ll check the windows.

BLUE
But I don’t have a gun.

Bernie reaches into his boot.
Pulls out a small 22 caliber.

BERNIE
Now you do.

INT. BASEMENT - SECRET ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
Carrie stands in the tunnel entrance.
Looks at Tolly.

His semi-automatic weapon aimed
at her mother. Eva. Layla.

TOLLY
Detective Love.
I’m so glad you could join us.

CARRIE
The pleasure’s all yours, asshole.

TOLLY
Now is that any way
to greet someone on Christmas?

CARRIE
Ho fucking ho, fuck-face.
(pulls out her gun)
You touch one hair on my mother’s head,
and you’re getting a lump of coal up your ass.

Tolly walks over to Layla.
Places the gun against her head.

LAYLA
(freaking out)
No, PLEASE. Please don’t SHOOT ME.

TOLLY
(to Carrie)
Drop the rod,
or I blow Selma Hayek’s brains out.

CARRIE
You blow her head off,
I blow off yours.

LAYLA
NO.

EVA
Carrie --

Tolly WHIPS another gun
out of his pocket.
Aims it at Carrie.

TOLLY
Forgot to mention I’m ambidextrous.
Drop it, hot stuff -- NOW.

Carrie drops her gun.
It CLATTERS to the floor.

Tolly SHOOTS Layla in the head.
BANG. Blood SPRAYS.
She HITS the floor.

Eva SCREAMS.

TOLLY (CONT’D)
Now kick the fucking gun OVER HERE.

Carrie KICKS the gun across the floor.
Tolly watches it SPIN.

In a flash, she KICKS him in the crotch, OOF.
He doubles over in pain.

He FIRES his gun. BANG. Misses her.
Eva SCREAMS again.

Margo opens her eyes,
and deftly JAMS her stun gun in Tolly’s side.
BZZZZZZZZZZ! 300 watts of electricity
ROAR through his body.
He dances like a marionette.

Carrie SOCKS him in the jaw with a hard left. CRACK.
He HITS the floor, THWUNK. Out cold.

CARRIE
Motherfucker.

Everyone stares at Tolly. Then Layla.

EVA
Oh my god. That -- poor girl.

MARGO
I’ve never seen someone -- shot before.

Carrie picks up her gun.
Puts it in her waistband. Gets Tolly’s.
Hands one to Eva. The other to Margo.

EVA
What are we supposed to do with these?

CARRIE
(gets his walkie)
I’ve got to go see if Blue is okay.
You two keep him covered.
If he does ANYTHING,
don’t hesitate to shoot.
(hands it her)
Call Bernie on this if anything happens.
He has another one.

MARGO
Why don’t we just shoot the bastard now?

CARRIE
It’s against the law.
(takes a breath)
Okay. I gotta go.

MARGO
Be careful, Carrie.

CARRIE
I always am.

She goes to the tunnel. Stops. Turns.

CARRIE (CONT’D)
I love you, mom.

PUSH IN ON Margo. In shock.

MARGO
I -- love you, too.

EXT. POOL HOUSE - AT THAT MOMENT
Gero stands at the door.
BANG-BANG-BANGS on it with his gun.

GERO
GIVE IT UP, we’ve got you OUTNUMBERED.
Open the door, or we’re COMING IN.

INT. POOL HOUSE - CONTINUOUS
Seth and Blue crouch behind the sofa, guns aimed.
Bernie leans against the wall near the door.

BERNIE
BULLSHIT. There’s three of US and two of YOU.
It’s a STALEMATE, motherfucker.

OUTSIDE
Mad Dog looks at Gero.

MAD DOG
Shit. What are we gonna do, boss?

GERO
I’m thinking, I’m thinking.

INSIDE
Bernie looks at Seth and Blue.

BERNIE
What are they doing?
Why aren’t they shooting at us?

SETH
Because gunshots will call attention to them.
Somebody will call the cops.

BLUE
I’ve got an idea.

BERNIE
YOU’VE got an idea.

BLUE
Yeah, listen -- there’s a back door.
Why don’t Seth and I sneak around
and surprise them?

BERNIE
No way.
Do you know how dangerous that is?

BLUE
Duh. You got a better idea?

SETH
I say let’s do it.

BERNIE
I can’t let you do that. It’s crazy.
You’re the one they’re after.

BLUE
That’s why they won’t expect it.
You keep them distracted,
and we’ll sneak up behind ‘em.
(beat)
Saw it in a Lifetime movie.

BERNIE
Well, if it was in a Lifetime movie --

No One Fucks With Me On Christmas

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Hump Day. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 27 of LITTLE GIRL BLUE, just as Carrie and Bernie -- and then Seth and Blue -- escape from the tunnels, they discover that white slave trafficker Tolly Chill and his goons have captured Carrie's mother, Margo, who's now unconscious in her wheelchair ...


INT. NORTH TUNNEL - NIGHT
Layla pushes Margo in the wheelchair.
Eva follows, rifle on her shoulder. Marching.

LAYLA
The agency never told me about this.

EVA
Always something going on with this family.
(beat)
You have anyone expecting you home tonight?

LAYLA
Just my cat, Pepe.

MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Stop right where you are,
or I’ll fucking SHOOT.

The women turn, look.
Tolly walks toward them, gun in hand.

TOLLY
Drop the rifle, Blondie,
and put ‘em where I can see ‘em.

Eva drops the gun.
It hits the floor, CLACK. Puts ‘em up.

TOLLY (CONT’D)
(points at Layla)
You too, Chiquita Banana.
(beat)
What’s up with the old broad?

EXT. BACK YARD - AT THAT MOMENT
A manhole cover opens up in the ground.
Out comes Seth, then Blue.

They look around,
shivering in the cold snow.

BLUE
It’s FREEZING.

He takes off his hoodie.
Puts it on her.

SETH
This should warm you up.

BLUE
Th-thanks.

SETH
(points)
The pool house is over there.
Follow me.

He grabs her hand,
and they DASH off in the snow.

INT - POOL HOUSE - AT THAT MOMENT
A door opens up in the floor.
It’s SHOVED to the side.

Hits the floor with a THUD.
Carrie, then Bernie come up the stairs.
Stop. Look around.

CARRIE
This is the pool house.

BERNIE
How do you know?

CARRIE
I was here earlier tonight.
(beat)
God, that seems like a year ago --

Carrie’s walkie talkie CRACKLES to life.

TOLLY (O.C.)
Detective Carrie Love --

CARRIE
That you, Chill?

TOLLY (O.C.)
Better get your ass back here.
Got some old broad in a wheelchair with me.
Hate to see anything bad happen to her.

CARRIE
Don’t TOUCH HER.
(whispers to Bernie)
He’s got my mother.

BERNIE
Shit.

TOLLY (O.C.)
Got a couple of other ladies, too.
But no Little Girl Blue. She with you?

CARRIE
She’s GONE, asshole.
You’re too late.
She went down the other tunnel.

TOLLY
Aha. Well, my associates
will catch up with her soon.
(beat)
Now get your ass back to the basement,
if you know what’s good for you.
And the old lady.

CARRIE
Don’t you DARE touch a hair on her HEAD.
I’m on my way.
(clicks it off, to Bernie)_
You go find Blue and Seth.

BERNIE
I should come with you.

CARRIE
BERNIE. That YOUNG GIRL and
MY BROTHER are out there.
You gotta find them,
make sure they’re okay.
(hands him the walkie)
Here, take this.
I’ll get that asshole’s
walkie after I kill him.

BERNIE
You’re awfully confident.

CARRIE
He’s got my MOTHER.
(beat)
And NO ONE fucks with me on CHRISTMAS.

INT. BASEMENT - SECRET ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
Tolly faces Margo, Eva and Layla.
Points his gun at them.

Watches Margo sleeping peacefully.
The IV drip.

TOLLY
What’s wrong with the old broad?

EVA
Carrie’s mother had a stroke.
Please don’t hurt her.

TOLLY
That’s her MOTHER?
I’ve died and gone to HEAVEN.
(laughs)
Best hostage I ever had.

PUSH IN ON Margo.
One eye opens a tiny bit. Then closes.

EXT. POOL HOUSE - AT THAT MOMENT
It’s stopped snowing. All is quiet.

Bernie races toward the pool house.
Seth and Blue come outside. See him.
They run toward each other.

BERNIE
You’re okay.

BLUE
Where’s Carrie?

SETH
And my mom and Eva?

BERNIE
(to Seth)
They’ve been captured.
But Carrie’s on her way to save them.
Don’t worry, they’ll be okay.

BLUE
Holy SHIT.

SETH
Don’t WORRY?

BERNIE
You don’t know Carrie.
If you saw the look on her face --
(motions to the pool house)
C’mon, let’s go inside.
I have a feeling we’re
about to expect company.

GERO AND MAD DOG
Appear at the end of the property.
See them.

GERO
You there!
Stay where you are or we’ll SHOOT.

BERNIE, SETH AND BLUE
Hear him. Look.

BERNIE
LET’S GO.

And they DASH into the pool house.

Open Sesame

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 26 of LITTLE GIRL BLUE, white slave traffickers Gero Chill and his son Tolly find the secret underground tunnels leading out of the secret room in Margo's basement. Meanwhile, Eva and Layla make their escape, pushing an unconscious Margo in her wheelchair ... while Seth and Blue ... and Carrie and Bernie have a tender, private moment ...


INT. MARGO'S MANSION - BASEMENT - MAIN ROOM - NIGHT
Mad Dog SWINGS the sledge hammer against the wall, BANG.
The wood CRACKS, pieces go FLYING.

MAD DOG
Piece a cake.

He swings again, BANG.
The exposed drywall CRACKS.

MAD DOG (CONT’D)
We’ll get through in no time.

GERO
This is a real mess.

TOLLY
I know, pop. I said I was sorry.

GERO
Sorry’s not good enough.
Now you’ve dragged me into this shit --
I’m TOO FUCKING OLD for this,
and on CHRISTMAS.
(beat)
I’m thinking of grounding you.

TOLLY
But I’m -- 35, pop.
What are you gonna do,
bend me over your knee?

GERO
Don’t tempt me, sonny.
Never too old for corporal punishment.

INT. BASEMENT - SECRET ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
Eva and Layla watch with horror
as the wall starts to buckle with each BANG.
Margo’s asleep, drugged to the gills.

LAYLA
What are we gonna DO?

EVA
We’ve got two choices.
We can either stay here and fight them --
or we can escape into one of the tunnels.

BANG. The wall SHUDDERS.

LAYLA
I say we get THE FUCK OUTTA HERE.

EVA
What about MARGO?

LAYLA
She’s on wheels --

EVA
Let’s get the hell out of here.

BANG. The wall CRACKS.
Layla grabs the back of Margo’s wheelchair.

LAYLA
Which tunnel, left or right?

EVA
Left -- the way Carrie and Bernie went.
You go first.

Layla nods, pushes Margo into the tunnel.
Eva follows.

The fireplace slides back into place behind her.
BANG. A big hole in the wall COLLAPSES
In a cloud of plaster and dust.

Mad Dog crawls in the opening.
Then Tolly and Gero.

They stand up. Brush themselves off.
Look around.

GERO
What the fuck?

TOLLY
I heard them, they were IN HERE.

MAD DOG
They ain’t now.

GERO
Goddammit to HELL. You fucking IDIOT.
(goes to the fireplace)
I’m gonna bash your SKULL IN.
(grabs the poker)
FUCK-HEAD.

The fireplace slides open.
Revealing the tunnels.

TOLLY
Holy fucking shit.

GERO
Open Sesame.
(pulls out his gun)
Tolly, you take the left tunnel,
Mad Dog and I’ll take the right.

TOLLY
(takes out his)
Let’s get ‘em.

They race down the tunnels.

INT. NORTH TUNNEL - AT THAT MOMENT
Seth and Blue walk down the tunnel.

SETH
So these guys killed your sister?

BLUE
Yeah. Carrie thinks Tolly did.
Jonna must have found out
about what he does.

SETH
What does he do?

BLUE
He’s a white slave trafficker.
They were auctioning off
underaged Romanian girls at the party.

Pause.

SETH
After this is -- over with,
I was wondering if --
(beat)
If you’d like to -- go on a --

BLUE
A DATE?

SETH
We could just -- go for coffee.

BLUE
Gee. I’d prefer dinner and a movie.

They stop.

SETH
Really?

BLUE
Really.

She leans over.
Kisses him on the cheek.

He gently puts his hands on her shoulders.
Leans in to kiss her, and --

MAD DOG (O.C.)
How much farther do you think this goes?

GERO (O.C.)
Oh, so you’re TIRED?
I’m the old man, and I’m FINE.

Seth and Blue stare at each other.

SETH
Someone’s coming.

BLUE
Run.

And they TAKE OFF down the tunnel.

INT. SOUTH TUNNEL - AT THAT MOMENT
Carrie and Bernie get to the end.
See a flight of stairs leading up
to an oblong door on the ceiling.

BERNIE
(gestures)
Ladies first.

CARRIE
(gestures)
After you.

BERNIE
You always were a contrarian.

CARRIE
You always were a male chauvinist pig.

They stare at each other.
He leans in. Kisses her.

She responds.
GRABS him passionately.

They go at it.
Then pull away from each other.

CARRIE (CONT'D)
Nah. Bad idea.

BERNIE
Kinda scary.
(beat)
Worth a try, though.

CARRIE
Temporary insanity.
(beat)
Follow me.

And she starts up the stairs --