Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Hair Metal Motherfuckers



Hey there, crime kids. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 17 of NOWHERE GIRL, it's the calm before the storm as 'stripper with a nuke' Cherry Nation gets the lead singer of Skull Bong to show her the way to the terrorists' address up in the Hollywood Hills, CIA agent Shag Holiday arrives at her location, and private security agent Renny Quick responds to the 911 call that the owner of the house where the terrorist cell is hiding secretly made ...

INT. CAB - NIGHT
April surveys the damage. Sniffs Yuri's dead body.

APRIL
Fucker smells like cabbage.

She leans over,
rummages in Yuri’s pockets.

Finds a knife.
Puts it in her mouth.
RIPS apart the wrist-tie.

APRIL
Thank GOD.

April rummages around.
Finds the tracking device.

Shoves it in her pocket.
Takes Yuri’s gun.
Looks at all the blood.

APRIL
Too conspicuous.
And the cops have the license number.
Better split.

She eases out the passenger door side,
softly CLICKS it shut.

INT. GARAGE - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
Lead Singer stares at Cherry’s gun.
Rapidly sobering up.

LEAD SINGER
Dude. That’s a real gun.

DRUMMER
(to Lead Singer)
Chill, Brody.
She’s not gonna hurt us.
(to Cherry)
Right?

BASS PLAYER
That’s a Sig Sauer, man.
Wicked piece.

CHERRY
Shut up, all of you.
I just need someone to help me find --
(pulls out piece of paper)
1155 Queens Road.
And we need to go, NOW.

BRODY
Wait a minute.
I recognize you --
you’re La Cienega Boulevard.

DRUMMER
SHIT, you’re right.

BASS PLAYER
Who?

BRODY
The porn star, dude --
La Cienega Boulevard.
(to Cherry)
Why’d you retire?
You were THE BEST.
So fucking HOT.

STAN
(to Peeler)
I thought she looked familiar.

CHERRY
(lowers her gun)
I got sick of it.
And I make a lot of money
feature dancing on the road.
I’ll be quitting that soon, too --
if I make it out of this alive.
(raises it)
So which one of you
hair metal motherfuckers
is gonna show us the way?

BRODY
I will. It’s my band.
(beat)
And we’re not 'hair metal,'
we’re DEATH metal.

INT. CORVETTE - MOVING - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
Shag drives into the heart of the strip,
passes Sunset Plaza.

Talks on his hands-free Bluetooth.

SHAG
She hung up on me.

INTERCUT WITH:

INT. CIA HEADQUARTERS - CUBICLE - CONTINUOUS
Lark turns away from her laptop.
Touches her headpiece.

LARK
Angry?

SHAG
You might say that.

LARK
You blew your cover.

SHAG
Yeah. It was stupid,
I know. I just --
(looks at the dashboard)
I’m getting close.
I’d love to get some backup.

LARK
You know I can’t do that, Shag.
The boss gave strict orders --
this one’s off-limits.
It’ll raise red flags
that go way beyond
me losing my job.
(beat)
Apparently the guy
that runs C-6
has A LOT of pull.

SHAG
Then connect me to C-6.

LARK
I don’t have the number.
Black ops? Hello?

SHAG
Lark, give yourself some credit.
You told me you could
gather ANY intel.

LARK
I’ll call you when I have something.

SHAG
That’s my girl.
(looks out the window)
I’m here. Gotta go.

LARK
Good luck.

SHAG
Yeah, right. You’ve never met Cherry.

EXT. BELL AIR SECURITY - ENTRANCE - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
A SECURITY SQUAD CAR pulls out of the building.

INT. SECURITY SQUAD CAR - MOVING - CONTINUOUS
The DRIVER turns to the
SECURITY GUARD sitting next to him.

DRIVER
Weatherman says it’s gonna rain.

SECURITY GUARD
Oh, it’s gonna rain, alright.

Meet RENNY QUICK (30’s).
Big and burly, former Special Forces.
Retired early due to injuries on the job.

RENNY
My knee is fucking killing me.
It’s DEFINITELY gonna rain --

3 comments:

  1. Oops! Yeah... what was I thinking... cops got the plate on that SUV... April wants to get far away from that ride...

    BTW... Alice - that's Tina's baby sister - thinks your stories ROCK!! She was reading with me last night... she says... "...fucking AWESOME!!" Her words... you know me... I never say fuck or fucking or fuck it or... yeah... LOL!!! Anyway... you got a new fan! :)

    "Dude.. thats a real gun!" LOL Yeah... got their attention, huh? Don't mess with Cherry boys... especially not when she is packing a SIG... you'll be making a whistling sound when the wind blows!

    Ooh... it'd be so cool being friends with a former porn star.... a whole new meaning to watching "home" movies! Hahahahahaha!!!

    Yeah Cherry... Death metal, not hair metal... big difference between Cannibal Corpse and Bon Jovi! :D lol!!

    Shag is gonna need more than "luck" when he meets up with Cherry... maybe a suit of armor, huh? :)

    Great "interlude" here, Carole... I love the dialogue.. as always.... tight... funny...

    I love the way your mind works... you are so inspiring... you know that, right? Keep it up, honey! :)

    XOXOXO <3 <3

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  2. Too cool about the new fan! Whee!

    Funny you mention the former porn star thing. I used to work at Playboy TV, and dated a few of them. (I write what I know ... )

    Anyway, I'm having lunch to day with former porn star Chasey Lain. She's interested in playing Carrie Love on the TV show. Sound cool? She's done some legit stuff as well, and is super-cool.

    Now, if I can just keep my hands to myself ...

    xo<3

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  3. OMG!! Playboy TV!! I bet that was just awesome!! And, dating porn stars!! Mmm... I'm getting a little..... hehehe!!

    Okay, I am more than a little envious!! You have led a very exciting life.... <3

    I've been in an orgy before, but I don't think there were any porn stars or celebrities there.... just wall-to-wall girls! MUAAHH!!

    I've heard of Chasey Lain! That girl has some "assets"... lol!! Oh yeah... I could see her as Carrie Love... mmm... if you can keep your hands off her, you are a better person than I...LOL!!!

    ReplyDelete