Make Mine A Double

Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 24 of BABY HEISTER, newly-minted heister Kelsey Hazard and her grandfather Doc get into the limo that's going to take them to the safe house in Downtown LA. Meanwhile, when Doc's wife Jo calls up an old flame to help her escape from East Los Angeles, more than sparks fly ...


EXT. SHITTY APARTMENT COMPLEX - DAY
A piece-of-shit grey cement slab of suburban hell
on a cul-de-sac with the freeway right behind it.

The ROAR of traffic going by is deafening.
Ah, beautiful West Covina.

INT. SHITTY APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DAY
Threadbare, old furniture. Threadbare decor.
But spic and span clean.

An OLD GUY (70’s) sits in a big wing chair
watching CNN on an old console TV.
Sipping a can of beer.

OLDER GUY
Fucking liberal panty-waists.

The phone RINGS. He reaches over.
Answers it.

OLDER GUY
Jack Cotton --

Meet JACK COTTON. Former Marine.
Still fit, in shape.

A little soft around the edges.
White hair in a buzz cut.

Blue eyes clear and sharp,
if a little red.

JACK
Jo Hazard? How the hell ARE ya --

INTERCUT WITH:

INT. EAST LA STREET - DAY
Jo stands at another pay phone across the street.

JO
Well, normally, just great --

JACK
What’s wrong?
Are you in trouble?

JO
You could say that.

JACK
Out with it, woman.
What’s going on?

JO
Doc did a job where
the inside man tried a cross.
A cop got killed,
our cover was blown,
and we had to blow the ranch.
He’s traveling to our
safe house with the crew,
and I’m transporting the stash.

JACK
Holy SHIT.
Don’t tell me --
and something fucked you up?

JO
Yeah, got pulled over by a cop --

JACK
And you popped him.

JO
You always were a mind-reader.

JACK
Had to be in Nam.
So I assume you need me
to run a little recon?
Sky you out?

JO
If you could, yeah.
I’m in a bit of a jam.

JACK
Semper Fi, little lady.
Give me your coordinates.

JO
I’m at an abandoned gas station
in East LA on the corner
of Whittier and Soto.

JACK
Nice neighborhood.
What are you driving?

JO
A black, eighty-five Cadillac hearse.
The stash is in the casket.

JACK
No wonder you had to pull off the freeway.
Sore-thumb city.
(looks at his watch)
I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.

JO
Thanks, Jack. I owe ya one.

JACK
Hey. Didn’t I always tell ya
I’d always be there for ya?

JO
Why do you think I called?

JACK
Move the car behind the building.
Don’t want to tempt the locals
with your splendor.

JO
Don’t worry about me. I’m a big girl.
Just need a little 'roadside assistance.'

EXT. LOS ANGELES INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT - DAY
The Piper Cub taxis over to a charter flight hanger.
A black limousine sits nearby.

The cub’s door opens.
Kelsey comes out.

Then Doc, with the bag.
They hustle over to the limo.

IN THE LIMO
The driver’s partition slides down.

A BIG BEEFY BLACK GUY (30’s)
sits behind the wheel.
Turns. Looks at Doc. Smiles.

BIG, BEEFY BLACK GUY
Where do I have the pleasure
of taking you and the young lady today?

DOC
Downtown. But we have to wait
for two more people to get here.

BIG, BEEFY BLACK GUY
No problem.
Please allow me to introduce myself.
The name’s Douglas.
But my friends call me 'Def-Con.'

KELSEY
I’m Kelsey. This is Doc.

DEF-CON
Pleased to meet you.
Feel free to avail yourself
of the array of spirits at the bar.

Doc sees the bottles and glasses.
His eyes light up.

DOC
Not a bad idea.
Take the edge off.

KELSEY
Make mine a double --