Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.
In Chapter 21 of NOWHERE GIRL, stripper-with-a-suitcase-nuke Cherry Nation tends to hipster Peeler Mardo's wounds in the safe house, but gets startled by a 'surprise visitor.' Meanwhile, Bel Air Security arrives at the terrorist's hideout in the Hollywood Hills ... in the middle of a 'trophy wife gang-bang' ...
INT. POOL HOUSE - NIGHT
Cozy. Very hunting lodge.
Fireplace. Stocked bar.
Cherry and Peeler enter the room.
She guides Peeler over to the couch.
He PLOPS down.
PEELER
Thank god.
(beat)
I’m freezing.
Cherry goes to the heater.
Turns it on.
CHERRY
We’ll get warmed up in a jiffy.
(looks around)
Better leave the lights off.
She find some towels. Grabs one.
THROWS it at Peeler.
PEELER
(catches it)
Thanks.
They dry themselves.
She notices the bar.
CHERRY
A little brandy should do the trick.
Then let’s take a look at your foot.
She pours two snifters.
Takes them to the couch. Sits.
CHERRY
(hands one to Peeler)
Here’s lookin’ at you, kid.
PEELER
Yeah.
(takes a sip)
Listen to that rain.
CHERRY
Yeah.
She leans over.
Kisses him on the cheek.
PEELER
What was that for?
ANGLE ON --
Cherry’s hand grabs the end
of the rusty nail. YANKS it.
PEELER
YELLS out in pain.
CHERRY
Distraction.
EXT. HOLLYWOOD HILLS MANSION - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
The squad car makes its way down the long, long driveway.
INT. SECURITY SQUAD CAR - MOVING - CONTINUOUS
The guys check out the lux digs.
DRIVER
Shit, look at this joint.
It’s bigger than my high school.
RENNY
Hurry up and park.
I gotta take a piss.
INT. MANSION - MASTER BEDROOM - NIGHT
Unbelievably opulent. Huge.
With a giant circular bed.
Trophy’s wrists have been tied
to the bedposts with rope.
Hamad is on top of her,
slowly humping away.
Her face is streaked with tears.
Eyes closed, softly whimpering.
HAMAD
(grunts)
American pussy --
(beat)
Smells like STRAWBERRIES.
Downstairs, the doorbell RINGS.
HAMAD
Go away.
He moves faster,
really goes at it.
HAMAD
You need to MOVE HIPS.
He SLAPS her. She CRIES out.
Starts humping him.
HAMAD
That’s more LIKE it.
Kamal comes to the door.
Averts his eyes.
KAMAL
Hamad.
Hamad keeps humping,
reaching his crescendo.
HAMAD
Ah -- ah -- ah --
KAMAL
HAMAD. Sorry to interrupt, but --
Hamad COMES like a bull on steroids.
ROARS like a tiger.
HAMAD
Praise ALLAH!
Fuck AMERICAN PUSSY!
The doorbell RINGS again.
KAMAL
There is someone at the door.
An ambulance. What should we do?
Hamad gets off Trophy Wife.
Pads over to Kamal.
HAMAD
Let them in.
Take husband with you.
Tell him we hurt wife
unless he cooperates.
KAMAL
Okay.
(beat)
How was she?
HAMAD
No pubic hair. Outrageous.
(beat)
But incredible turn-on.
INT. POOL HOUSE - NIGHT - AT THAT MOMENT
Cherry and Peeler sit on the couch
watching the rain coming down outside.
It’s letting up a bit.
PEELER
So what next.
CHERRY
Well, since our tour guide
got his fucking HEAD blown up,
I think I better call the dude
and get directions.
Cherry pulls out her cell phone.
Tries to dial the number.
But the battery is DEAD.
CHERRY
SHIT.
She FLINGS it against the wall -- CRACK.
CHERRY
MOTHER-FUCKER!
PEELER
Hey, calm down. It’s okay.
(pulls out his phone)
You can use mine.
CHERRY
I can’t TAKE THIS ANYMORE.
Just then, the side door
BURSTS OPEN with a CRUNCH.
Splintered wood goes FLYING --
And April FLIES IN on the Vespa.
PEELER
Holy shit!
CHERRY
NOOOOOO!
Mine smells like strawberries... oh! TMI? LOL!!
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