Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. Hope you had a happy Xmas. But enough holiday cheer, because now it's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 17 of NOWHERE GIRLS, the shit hits the fan when super-spy sisters Cherry Nation and April Street start to make their getaway in black op spook Serge Reno's RV 'safe house on wheels,' when they're suddenly attacked by 'Assassin To The Stars' The Bagger and his evil henchwoman Lemon LeBon ...


INT. SERGE’S MOTOR HOME - MOVING - NIGHT
April CLICKS her phone shut.
Stares at it.

CHERRY
(over her shoulder)
Any luck?

APRIL
He’s on an op.
Said he’d call me back.

Just then, a metal cannister
FLIES DOWN from the ceiling.

HITS the floor.
A cloud of GREEN SMOKE starts BILLOWING.

APRIL
What the FUCK?

SERGE
(turns around)
What’s going on?

CHERRY
SMOKE BOMB.
We’re being ATTACKED.
PULL OVER.

Serge turns the wheel,
turns off onto the shoulder. Stops.

OUTSIDE ON THE FREEWAY
The Bagger pulls over behind them.

BAGGER
Got you now, me pretties --

IN THE MOTOR HOME
The compartment has filled with GREEN SMOKE.
April and Cherry CHOKE on the fumes.
Serge holds a handkerchief to his mouth.

CHERRY
What the fuck IS THIS?

SERGE
It’s CHLORINE GAS.
It’ll KILL US.
Open THE WINDOWS.

GAGGING and CHOKING,
they go to the windows.

Serge YANKS one open.
The gas starts to escape as --

Lemon FLIES DOWN from the ceiling,
HITS the floor wearing a gas mask.

A BEAM OF LIGHT on her rifle
starts sweeping through the smoke.

LEMON
Yippee-kai-yay, tuna-FUCKERS.

April sees her, DUCKS.
ROLLS across the floor.

GRABS her by the ankles.
She FALLS OVER, THUD.
Starts FIRING blindly.

Bullets PING-PING-PING around the trailer.
POP. ZZZZZZT. The plasma screen bites the dust.

Cherry RACES over.
PUNCHES her in the stomach, OOF.
RIPS the mask off her face.

LEMON
(choking)
GAAAAA -- NO.

The Bagger LEAPS through a open window,
also in a gas mask.
He raises an Uzi --

BAGGER
Faster, pussycat -- KILL, KILL.

And starts blindly SHOOTING
through the fog in a SPRAY OF BULLETS.

Serge RACES up behind him.
GRABS him a bear hug.

Cherry GRABS Lemon,
WHIRLS her around so she’s
facing The Bagger.

Her body gets SPRAYED.
JERKING like a rag doll.

Serge HEAD-BUTTS The Bagger.
He TRIPS, falls over.

April RACES OVER. GRABS his gun.
CRACKS him on the head with it.

But Bagger’s one vicious thug.
He tries to GRAB it from April.

They HIT the floor, roll around,
fighting for control.
PUNCHING, KICKING, HITTING each other.

Serge pulls out a Walther PPK.
Tries to take aim at his head,
but can’t get clear a shot.

April and Bagger continue fighting.
Get near Cherry, who’s got her Glock out,
also trying to get a shot.

Cherry STOMPS on the floor
with the heel of her boot.

A ten-inch steel blade
FLIES out of the toe --

And she SHOVES it in his face
with a sickening CRUNCH.

He stops moving.
A pool of blood starts
forming on the carpet.

APRIL
(wide-eyed)
Where did you get THAT?

CHERRY
(RIPS it out of his head)
Sorry. Forget to tell you --

She wipes the blood off
on Bagger’s shirt.

KICKS the floor with her heel.
It SHOOTS back in the boot.

CHERRY
Beta test, from Apple.
(smiles)
The 'I-Blade.'