Liquid Breakfast

Happy Saturday, crime aficianados. Feeling a little violent? Got a mean streak? An itch that can't be scratched? Then shake your tailfeather over to the coolest joint on the web. That Killing Feeling. Open for business, serving the finest in hardboiled pulp. Shaken, not slurred.

Screened a big, fat, fun, stupid action movie last night -- SWAT. Now, in case you're wondering why I'm watching pretty much nothing but big budget crime stuff like this, well -- there's a method to my madness. I'm still a student of noir and classic films, but right now I'm doing research. I wanna write one of these. In fact, my next screenplay, after I"m done with a draft of LITTLE GIRL BLUE, is gonna be one.

So I'm researching.

Back to SWAT. I had no interest in it when it came out -- sounded stupid. A big-screen version of a questionable TV show from the 80's? Well, guess what. It works. Sam Jackson, LL Cool J, Michelle Rodriguez, and a pre-rehab Colin Ferrell are terrific in this fast, violent shoot-em-up Check it out if you haven't ..

Onto today's bleak scene from WILSHIRE BOULEVARD. Carrie goes to the beach with a bottle, and calls Gay Flender, wife of a certain dead movie producer. The plot indeed thickens ...


EXT. VENICE BEACH - SHORELINE - ROCKS - AFTERNOON
Carrie sits on the rocks watching the waves.
The surfers doing their thing.
She drinks from a new bottle. Winces.
Pulls out her cell phone. Dials. Listens --

CARRIE
Gay?
(listens)
Yeah, it’s me. Your pigeon. Your frame.
Tell me why you did it.
I want some answers, NOW.

SPLIT SCREEN WITH:

INT. YAVO/FLENDER FILMS - OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
Gay paces the floor. Smoking a cigarette.
A Cheshire cat.

GAY
Answers? To what?
I hired YOU to get ME some answers --

CARRIE
Don’t play dumb with me,
you vacant, airbrushed strumpet.
I’ve been framed for your husband’s murder,
and I’ve got a funny feeling
you had something to do with it.

The door opens. Modi slides in.
Sees Gay’s on the phone.
Gay raises a finger, ‘shushes’ him.
Presses ‘speakerphone.’
Softly places the receiver in its cradle.

GAY
You mean to tell me you think
I hired you to find my husband’s killer,
and then I FRAMED you?
That doesn’t make sense.

CARRIE
Yeah. Kinda like one of your late husband’s
fucking piece-of-shit movies.
A bad rip-off of THE POSTMAN ALWAYS RINGS TWICE.
Oh, wait -- that’s quality source material.
This reeks of Jackie Collins.
Maybe Danielle Steele.

Carrie BURPS.

Modi shoots Gay a look.
Gay shakes her head.

GAY
Kinda early in the morning for cocktails, detective.
And I don’t like your attitude.
Consider yourself fired.
Go find yourself a gutter to roll around in.

CARRIE
Not so fast, bitch.
We’re going to ‘take a meeting.’

GAY
I’m sorry, but my schedule’s pretty full.
Booked solid the rest of the month.

CARRIE
Not at your office, dummy.
You think I’m gonna walk into a trap?
Somewhere neutral.
I’ll let you know where.
And when. And watch your back.
One way or another,
I’m gonna getcha-getcha-getcha.

She hangs up. CLICK.
Drains the bottle. Wipes her mouth.
FLINGS it into the sea.
Slowly, carefully stands up.

CARRIE (CONT’D) (V.O.)
But first, let’s pay a little visit to the hospital.
Visiting hours are almost over,
and I need to go pay my disrespects.