Friday, March 9, 2012
Leave The Driving To Us
Hey there, crime kids. Happy Friday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.
In Chapter 40 of BABY HEISTER, having been double-crossed by psycho cop Flint Cole, teenage heister Kelsey Hazard, Jo and Simon are held hostage in their escape vehicle with the stolen money from the bank. Meanwhile, Flint and Doc get ready to steal back Doc's life savings ... at the police precinct where it's locked up in the evidence room ...
EXT. ABANDONED WAREHOUSE - DAY
A ramshackle joint from the turn of the century.
The Dumpster truck pulls up to the entrance.
HONKS once. Then twice again.
The doors slowly open inward.
The truck drives in.
INT. ABANDONED WAREHOUSE - CONTINUOUS
A giant space. Almost big enough
to be an airplane hanger.
Parked off to the side is a
giant semi tractor-trailer, back doors open,
with a ramp leading up inside it.
Flint stands near it,
along with EB PICKER (40’s),
a giant redneck trucker
right out of central casting.
Holding a shotgun. Chewing tobacco.
Confederate flag hat. The works.
IN THE DUMPSTER TRUCK
Kelsey looks at Doc.
Shakes her head.
I don’t like it.
Don’t have any choice.
Who’s the scary-looking dude
next to him?
Must be the driver.
How do we know we can trust them?
Fifteen million bucks says so.
And besides, we now have protection.
He’ll keep the law away from us.
(opens his door)
C’mon. Let’s get it over with.
They get out of the truck.
Flint and Eb walk over.
Well, if it isn’t the
Cooch In The Wall Gang.
Okay. Here’s how it’s gonna work.
Eb here gave the cops an anonymous tip
that you’re heading east
on the ten freeway in a U-Haul,
so the cops are looking for you there.
Meanwhile, he’s gonna take you
to the Marina where your boat is.
(CRACKS the shotgun)
Leave the drivin’ to us.
You’ll wait there while
Doc and I go get his dough.
If I don’t return safely, they die.
And if they get cute, you’re toast.
Sometimes I’m so brilliant
I can’t fucking take it.
(off their stares)
Okay. Toss your guns on the floor
and let’s get this show
on the fuckin’ ROAD.
Kelsey, Simon and Jo toss them.
Eb starts picking them up.
If we’re going to rob a police precinct,
I’d like to keep mine.
Sorry, pop. No can do.
(off his stare)
You’ll get it back. Promise.
What if I take out the bullets?
He carefully pulls out his Magnum.
Racks out the clip. KA-CHINK.
Dumps the bullets on the floor.
Holds it up.
Shows it’s empty.
SHOVES it back in, CLICK.
INT. SEMI TRAILER - REAR COMPARTMENT - MOVING - DAY
Simon, Kelsey and Jo sit on the floor in the rear.
This fucking sucks.
We’ll figure something out.
(looks at Jo)
Motherfucker made a BIG mistake.
No one messes with DOC --
EXT. POLICE PRECINCT - PARKING LOT - DAY
Flint’s Crown Vic pulls into the lot. Parks.
INT. FLINT’S CROWN VIC - DAY
Flint shuts off the engine.
Looks at Doc.
Now don’t shit your pants.
This is gonna go real smooth.
Everyone I work with
is at the command center.
And the shift doesn’t change until two,
so there’s almost no one around.
So how we gonna do this?
Evidence room is downstairs.
Stairwell isn’t far from the rear exit.
We go in quick, grab the duffles
and slide back out. Easy as pie.
What if someone recognizes me?
Flint hands him
a baseball cap and shades.
Put these on and
you’ll look like a dick.
No shit --