All In The Family

Happy Friday, crime kids! It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 34 of NOWHERE GIRL, we finally arrive at the blood-curdling, bone-smashing, ultra-violent conclusion of our story, where long-lost sisters Cherry Nation and April Street fight to the death Sledge Crafton, their FATHER ...

INT. SLEDGE'S INTERROGATION ROOM - NIGHT
The window shade CLOSES.
Water starts GUSHING down
from a row of pipes in the ceiling.

CHERRY
What the fuck?

APRIL
Stand back!

April raises her Sig Sauer.
SHOOTS at the door.

The bullets FLY OFF
and RICOCHET around the room.

Cherry aims at the window.
SHOOTS a SPRAY OF BULLETS at it.
They, too BOUNCE of the glass and RICOCHET.

The water swirls around,
now reaching up to their knees.

APRIL (CONT’D)
The CEILING. Let’s see if we can blow a HOLE in it!

CHERRY
Let’s DO IT.

The girls raise their weapons.
Start FIRING at the ceiling.
Chunks of cement start FLYING off.

April shields her eyes with her forearm.
So does Cherry.

INT. INTELLIGENCE OFFICE - AT THAT MOMENT
Crafton sits at his desk. Looks out the window. Pensive.
He leans over. Hits a button on his speakerphone.

SLEDGE
Donner.

DONNER (O.C.)
(electronic)
Yes, chief.

SLEDGE
I’m going to go home in a few minutes
and get some shut-eye.
These all-nighters are killing me.
I’m not getting any younger.

DONNER (O.C.)
Would you care for some company?

SLEDGE
That would be nice.

DONNER (O.C.)
Just give me a few minutes.
(beat)
I’m sorry about the girls.

SLEDGE
So am I, Donner. So am I.
(beat)
Please do me a favor and
never mention them again.

INT. INTERROGATION ROOM - CONTINUOUS
The water is now up their waists.
The girls have now blown out a nice-sized hole
in the ceiling about six-inches deep.

APRIL
This isn’t gonna work.
We’re gonna have think of something else.

CHERRY
Let me get up on your shoulders.
Maybe it’s not that thick.

APRIL
Okay.

April cups her hands.
Cherry climbs up April.
Stands on her shoulders.
Pushes the ceiling where they’ve shot it out.

Nothing.

CHERRY
Shit! We’re gonna DIE!

APRIL
Don’t EVER say that. We’re NOT gonna die.

Cherry JUMPS down. Hits the water with a SPLASH.

CHERRY
Then tell me, what THE FUCK are we GONNA DO?

She BURSTS into tears. April GRABS her. Hugs her.

APRIL
Shhhhh, it’s okay -- I’m gonna figure something out.

INT. INTELLIGENCE OFFICE - AT THAT MOMENT
Sledge holds an old, dog-eared Polaroid in his hand.
A tear streaks down his cheek.

CLOSE ON --
The photograph.
We see two three-year-old little girls.
Gorgeous. Happy. Smiling. APRIL and ABBY.

SLEDGE
Pulls out a cigarette lighter. Sets it on FIRE.
Tosses it in the ashtray on his desk.

SLEDGE
Ashes to ashes --

He wipes his cheek.
Pours a shot of something brown.
Downs it. Punches on the speakerphone.

SLEDGE (CONT’D)
You about ready, Donner?

INT. INTERROGATION ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
The water has reached the girl’s necks.
Pretty soon they’re gonna have to start treading water.

CHERRY
I don’t CARE if it’s DANGEROUS.
Let’s fucking DO IT.

APRIL
Okay.
(beat)
One last thing. In case we --
don’t make it out of this --
I just want you to know that
I’m proud to have you as a sister.
(beat)
You can really kick ass.

CHERRY
(smiles, teary-eyed)
You, too -- sis.
(beat)
I mean -- I’m proud, too.

They hug. April pulls away. Holds up a GRENADE.

APRIL
Okay -- here’s the plan.
It explodes in three seconds.
We’re gonna go to the wall opposite the window.
I’m gonna pull the pin and count ONE, TWO --
and then THROW IT at the window --
then we dive down to the bottom and hold our breath.
The water might just shield us from the blast.

CHERRY
Let’s DO IT.

APRIL
Okay.

They slog through the water to the opposite wall.
April holds up the grenade. Looks at Cherry, who nods --

April PULLS THE PIN.

APRIL (CONT’D)
ONE, TWO --

And HURLS it at the window. They DIVE.

UNDER WATER
The girls swim to the bottom.

THE WINDOW
EXPLODES in a million pieces.
Torrents of water start GUSHING through the opening.

UNDER WATER
The explosion ROCKS the girls against the wall. OOF.

INT. INTELLIGENCE OFFICE - AT THAT MOMENT
A wave of water CRASHES into Sledge’s office.

SLEDGE
What the fuck?

He JUMPS up on his desk.
Pulls out his Browning 9mm.

APRIL AND CHERRY
Appear in the doorway. Wet. Weapons aimed.

APRIL
Drop the gun, Father. We’re taking you in.

Sledge looks at the girls. Tears in his eyes.

SLEDGE
You girls really make me proud.

He puts the gun in his mouth.
And BLOWS HIS HEAD OFF -- BANG.

Brains and blood SPRAY the window behind him.
His body CRUMPLES to a heap on the desk.

CHERRY
Holy shit.

APRIL
I know.

CHERRY
Holy shit.

APRIL
I know.
(beat)
Holy shit.

DONNER
Appears in the doorway.

DONNER
What the -- ?

Cherry FLIPS UP her Glock
and BLASTS Donner in the forehead.
Red dot like a third eye.
She FALLS OVER, THUMP.

APRIL
Nice shot.

CHERRY
Thanks. I’m really starting to
groove on this spy shit.

APRIL
Hey. All in the family.

EXT./INT. MINI COOPER - MOVING - MOMENTS LATER
The girls cruise down Hollywood Boulevard.
Pass Grauman’s Chinese Theater,
the wind whipping their hair.

CHERRY
Goddammit. My adrenaline is still pumping.

APRIL
Kinda cool, huh. Welcome to the club.

CHERRY
Does Interpol have any openings?

APRIL
Are you kidding?
When I tell them I have a twin,
they’ll shit bricks.
You’re In Like Flynt, Agent Nation.

CHERRY
'Agent Nation.' I like the sound of that.
Got a nice ring to it.
(beat)
So what are you gonna do
with your half-million?

APRIL
My --

CHERRY
Half of the money.
In the attache case.
It’s in the trunk.

April shoots her a look. Beams.

APRIL
Let’s go grab some breakfast.
My treat. I’m fucking starving.

FADE TO BLACK

OVER CLOSING CREDITS:

EXT. HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD - PODIUM - DAY
Cherry and April are given duplicate keys
to the city by the mayor.
Flashbulbs POP. The CROWD cheers.

INT. ROMANTIC RESTAURANT - NIGHT
Cherry and Peeler drink champagne by candlelight.
He takes her hand. Kisses it.

CAMERA PANS OVER to where
CHERRY’S DAUGHTERS are sitting.
They start GIGGLING.

EXT. TARGET RANGE - DAY
April takes aim at a target.
BLASTS OFF a ROUND OF SHOTS.

ANGLE ON --

THE TARGET
With a perfect circular ring
of bullet holes around the head.

APRIL
Hands the gun to Cherry.

CHERRY
Takes aim. FIRES off another ROUND OF SHOTS.

ANGLE ON --

THE TARGET
The ring of bullet holes now has a smiley face.

EXT. EGYPT - THE PYRAMIDS - NIGHT
April and Cherry chase two BAD GUYS up the steep incline.

EXT. PARIS - THE EIFFEL TOWER - NIGHT
April hangs over the railing with one hand,
pelted by rain, the wind whipping in her hair.
GUN SHOTS fire over her head.

Cherry leans down, pulls her up.
SLAPS a gun in April’s hand.

They SPIN AROUND, and SHOOT
a DOZEN ATTACKERS, killing them.

INT. THE WHITE HOUSE - OVAL OFFICE - DAY
April and Cherry sit in chairs
across from the PRESIDENT.

Cherry says something. Then April.
The President raises his eyebrows.
Picks up the phone.

And starts dialing ...