Hey there, crime kids. Happy Friday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.
In Chapter 10 of A DISH BEST KILLED, B-movie starlet Haven Crayce and her secret lesbian lover, personal trainer Jett Targo, check on Haven's retired film director husband Dart's health after he suffers a nasty fall ...
INT. CRAYCE HOUSEBOAT - GALLEY ENTRANCE - NIGHT
Jett follows Haven onto the boat.
JETT
You can’t tell anyone else about us.
If we’re going to -- do this,
nobody can know we’re --
(a whisper)
In a relationship.
HAVEN
You’re right.
I’m sorry, I wasn’t --
(realizes)
Did you say we’re -- in a relationship?
Jett takes Haven’s hand.
Holds it to her heart.
JETT
You make me feel something
I’ve never felt before, Haven.
For the first time in my life,
I feel ALIVE. Like I can do anything.
Be anyone. Go anywhere.
HAVEN
I’m with you, baby.
(beat)
Straight down the line.
INT. CRAYCE HOUSEBOAT - DART’S BEDROOM - MOMENTS LATER
Jett and Haven kneel
at the side of the bed.
Watch Dart.
Sleeping peacefully.
JETT
We should wake him.
HAVEN
What should I tell him about you?
JETT
That I’m your personal trainer,
and I know alot about --
Dart’s eyes OPEN. Groggy.
DART
(to Jett)
Who the fuck are you?
HAVEN
This is my trainer, Dart.
She heard what happened, and
wanted to take a look at you,
see if you’re okay --
JETT
Hello, Mr. Crayce.
I’m a big fan.
DART
Trainer? You hired a trainer?
I’m not going to pay for --
JETT
I’m not charging her, Mr. Crayce.
We met walking our dogs.
Haven told me about
having chronic back pain,
and I offered to show her an
exercise routine that would help.
DART
Out of the goodness of your heart.
JETT
Well, sir -- it’s what I do.
I was raised in a good, Christian family,
and I was taught to do unto others --
DART
You said you’re a fan of mine?
JETT
Oh, yeah -- I’m a big movie buff.
DART
What’s your favorite film of mine?
JETT
Blood Gets In Your Eyes.
Bogart and Stanwyck, together for
the first time. Perfect film.
(beat)
Is it true that the original leads
were Ronald Reagan and Jane Wyatt?
DART
Why, yes -- but, how did you -- ?
JETT
Robert Osbourne.
Turner Movie Classics.
Never miss it.
DART
That Bobby Osbourne.
What a little rascal.
I owe him a lunch.
HAVEN
How are you feeling?
How’s your head?
DART
My head is fine.
It’s my ass that’s killing me.
JETT
No blurry vision?
Heart palpitations?
DART
I’m just fine, young lady.
Now, if you’ll excuse us, it’s
almost time for my dialysis, and my --
Dart looks at Haven. A lewd grin.
HAVEN
Physical therapy.
PUSH IN ON Jett. Horrified.
