Chunks In Sauce

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 21 of EXIT, faded rock star Bettie Black tries to keep a cop from coming into the club and discovering fugitive gunman Danny Peel and the hostage situation, with violent results ...


INT. THE EXIT ROOM - EARLY MORNING
The buzzer RINGS.

URGENT MALE VOICE (O.C.)
OPEN UP, POLICE.

CASEY
Shit.

BANG-BANG-BANGING on the door.

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
OPEN UP THE DOOR RIGHT NOW.

DANNY
We need a diversion.

CASEY
(to Mia)
Go put some music on.
Make it seem like a
private party or something.

Mia dashes over to the sound system.
Turns it on.

Thievery Corporation bubbles
its world beat on hidden speakers.

BETTIE
Let me try.

DANNY
Yeah, go ahead. Do it.

Bettie nods.
RACES over to the door.
Opens it a crack.

Danny grabs his shotgun.
Follows her.
Stands off to the side.

BETTIE
Sorry, officer. Private party.
Was the music too loud?
Joint’s supposed to be soundproof --

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
I need to come in
and search the place, Miss.
There’s a dangerous felon on the loose.
(beat)
You’re Bettie Black --

BETTIE
That’s me.

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
I’m afraid I’m still
gonna have to come in.

BETTIE
Do you have to?
Me and my friends were
gonna be leaving soon.
Can you come back a little later?

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
I’m sorry, Ms. Black.

BETTIE
Bettie, please.
Do I looke like a ‘Ms?’

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
I believe you -- Bettie,
but I gotta come in.
It’s my job.
We gotta check every building.
Sorry to inconvenience you.

BETTIE
Who you looking for?

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
Are you kidding?
It’s all over the news.

BETTIE
I don’t watch the news.
You said you’re looking for
a dangerous felon?

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
Yeah. Some asshole
killed a cop up in the hills.
We got a city-wide manhunt going on.

BETTIE
Holy shit.

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
I’ll just be a minute.

BETTIE
Well, see -- the thing is,
we’ve been doing some partying.
Smoking some weed,
doing a little blow.
Promise you won’t bust us?

ANGRY COP (O.C.)
Don’t worry about it.
Got bigger fish to fry.
Now if you’ll excuse me --

The door starts to push open.
ANGRY COP (30’s) starts coming in.

Meet sergeant BIFF GRIFFIN,
a big beefy fellow.

Danny SHOVES his sawed-off
against the side of his head.

DANNY
Make one move
and you’re chunks in sauce.

Biff freezes.

DANNY
I want you to take three steps, VERY SLOWLY.

He does.
Danny continues to aim the gun at his head.
Bettie quickly closes the door.

DANNY
Now VERY SLOWLY unholster your weapon,
drop it on the floor
and kick it across the room.

Biff carefully unsnaps the holster.
Gingerly pulls it out.

DROPS it. KICKS it.
The gun SKITTERS across the floor.

BIFF
You’ll never get away with this.
You realize how many cops are out there?

DANNY
Shut up.
Now the gun on your ankle.

He sighs. Bends down.
Pulls up a pants leg.

Pulls out a small snub-nose revolver.
Drops it and kicks it away.

DANNY
Now your pepper spray.

Biff unhooks a cannister
off his belt. TOSSES it.

DANNY
Go sit over there.

He marches defiantly over to the banquet.
Sits. Glowering.

BIFF
My partner’s gonna come looking for me.

DANNY
Shut the fuck up.

SKY
You want us to tie him up?

BIFF
(looks at him)
Hey. You’re that actor.

DANNY
I said SHUT THE FUCK UP.
(to Mia)
You got some rope
or something in the office?

MIA
I think we have some twine.

DANNY
Go get it.

Mia dashes off.

CASEY
We should keep him in here.
The other cop in the VIP room
and he could help each other escape.

DANNY
Yeah. Good idea.

BETTIE
(points)
Over there against the wall.

SKY
(points)
Over there in that dark corner’s better.

BIFF
(to Danny)
Wait a minute.
They’re not acting like hostages.
What the fuck’s going on?

Danny marches over.
CRACKS him on the head with the sawed-off.
Biff slumps over, out cold.

DANNY
What part of ‘shut the fuck up’
didn’t you get?