Human Remains Of The Day

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Tuesday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 12 of BLUE HOTEL, drug dealer Beggar Leck calls his new 'boss' Vlad to help him get rid of the dead body in hipster hooker Alona Tal's hotel room at the dive on the beach, and finds out Vlad's services don't come cheap. In fact, they come with strings attached ...


INT. ALONA’S SHITTY HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Alona and Holly sit on the bed,
drinking vodka from plastic cups.

Beggar looks out the window
at the action outside.

Takes hits of a joint.
Passes it to Alona.

ALONA
(takes it)
Thanks --

HOLLY
It seemed to happen
in slow motion --

ALONA
(takes a hit)
Fucking unreal.

HOLLY
It all happened so fast.
There was no time to think.

BEGGAR
(turns, looks)
Our little girl’s good
with knives AND guns --

Beggar’s phone RINGS.
He pulls it out.
Answers it.

BEGGAR (CONT’D)
About fucking time --
(listens)
Vlad, hey.
Yeah, it’s urgent.
We’ve got a -- a situation here.
We need your help.
(listens)
There was a -- an accident.
Someone was killed.
We need help
getting rid of the body.
(listens)
Yeah. The Starlight Hotel,
right on the boardwalk.
(listens)
What do you mean
it’s on the news?
Nobody knows about it --
(realizes)
That’s something else.
Somebody jacked the
corner liquor store --
(listens)
Well, yeah --
there’s cops around.
But they’ll go away.
(listens)
In the morning? But --
(listens)
FIVE GRAND?

INTERCUT WITH:

INT. SLEAZY APARTMENT - NIGHT
Vlad sits on an overstuffed sofa
in his opium den of a joint.

Smoking a cigarette.
Talking on his phone.

VLAD
Did you think we would
provide service for FREE?

BEGGAR
Well, since you
put it that way --

VLAD
And you do realize
we will ask you
to return the favor?
That you will become
part of family?

BEGGAR
Yeah. Of course.

VLAD
Good.
We’ll be there at five AM.
Before sunrise.

BEGGAR
Okay. Thanks.

VLAD
No. Thank you --

He hangs up.
Pours a shot of vodka.
DOWNS it. Calls out.

VLAD (CONT’D)
Anya, I have news.

ANYA (O.C.)
Oh, yeah?
What is news?

ANYA TURGENEV (20’s)
walks into the room.

Hot. Cold. Curvy.
Raven-haired.

Blood red lips.
Former stripper.

Miles of milk white legs.
Serpent tattoo near the hemline.

Ouch.

VLAD
Road trip.

ANYA
Ooh. Goody. Where to?

VLAD
Venice Beach, baby.

ANYA
What is job?

VLAD
Disposal of --
human remains.

ANYA
Ahhhhh.
You know how to
make girl happy.

VLAD
Come to Poppa,
my kinky one.

She does.
Crawls into his lap.
He strokes her hair.

ANYA
(sings softly)
'They asked me how I knew,
my true love was true -- '

VLAD
(sings)
'I of course replied,
when a true love dies -- '

ANYA
'Blood gets in your eyes.'

They stare at each other.
Then ERUPT with mad laughter --