Nice Rack

Happy Friday, crime motherfuckers! You say you're fed up? Mad as hell, and can't take it any more? Then why not blow off some steam at the coolest hardboiled joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

Onto today's chapter from BLOOD GETS IN YOUR EYES, where another one bites the dust.

When we last left the crime scene cops, they were inspecting prep school teacher Gill Sherry's dead body, impaled on a fence post in the hotel alley. Meanwhile, inside, hooker Alona Tal goes to the front desk, looking for something to cut up the dead bodies INSIDE her room ...

EXT. HOTEL STARLIGHT - BACK ALLEY - NIGHT

Danette and Bernie examine Gill’s body impaled on the fence.

Kenny is further on down the alley. Throwing up.

BERNIE

Poor kid. His first stiff.

DANETTE

It’s his first week.

Talk about baptism by fire.

Kenny wipes his mouth on his sleeve.

Walks over.

BERNIE

You okay, kid?

KENNY

Yeah.

BERNIE

Don’t feel bad.

I’ve been on the force twenty years

and I’m still not used to it.

KENNY

Seeing a dead body?

BERNIE

No. Seeing a cop puke.

(off his look)

Just busting your chops, sport.

C’mon, let’s go set up the crime scene tape.

INT. THE STARLIGHT HOTEL - FRONT DESK - AT THAT MOMENT

Alona glides up to the counter. Bunky smiles toothily.

ALONA

What’s up, Bunky?

BUNKY

Cops, that’s what up.

You see on the news about

that teacher who killed his wife?

Well, he checked in here tonight,

so I gave ‘em a call --

‘an when they got here,

they found him dead in the alley.

Impaled on a fence post.

Guess he knew they were comin’ for ‘em

and took a dive.

This SOCKS Alona in the gut.

She hides her shock.

ALONA

Holy shit.

(weird smile)

I guess that --

makes it easier for them, huh.

BUNKY

It’s karma, man.

What goes around, comes around.

(beat)

You’re up late. Whatcha need?

ALONA

Well, it’s kind of embarrassing --

(beat)

My boyfriend and I were playing with my --

handcuffs, and I -- lost the key.

BUNKY

(big grin)

And now you wanna saw ‘em off.

ALONA

(nods)

Yeah. You have anything I can use?

Bunky gets up.

Walks over to a beaten-up,

old bureau on the side wall.

Opens a drawer.

Rummages around in it.

BUNKY

Old Bunky got everything in his bag o’ tricks.

Hold on a sec.

(pulls out an enema bag)

You into water sports?

Alona rolls her yes. Bunky chuckles.

Puts it back. Roots around in the drawer.

Pulls out a giant HACKSAW.

BUNKY (CONT’D)

Here we go. Industrial-sized.

(hands it to her)

Got it from a butcher, believe it or not.

ALONA

Wow. Thanks.

BUNKY

Bet you could cut up a dead body

real easy with that sucker.

ALONA

(pales)

Wh-what?

BUNKY

Just joshin’ with ya.

You have a good night, now.

ALONA

(flirty)

I will, thanks.

(beat)

Hey, could you do me a favor?

BUNKY

Name it.

Alona sticks her chest out.

Dark nipples straining against the pale, gauzy fabric.

Bunky gets an eyeful.

ALONA

Beggar’s going out of town for a couple weeks,

and this is our last night together for awhile.

If anybody comes looking for me,

would you tell them I’m not around?

It would mean a lot to me.

BUNKY

(in a daze)

Sure thing --

ALONA

Thanks, baby.

She blows him a kiss,

turns and dashes up the stairs.

BUNKY

(sighs)

Haven’t seen a rack like that since

The Dead at the Fillmore West in seventy-two.