Rockets Red Glare

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 2 of BABY HEISTER, wannabe bank robber Kelsey Hazard and her grandfather Doc sit down to dinner at their farmhouse. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Kelsey, her parents Griff and Chelle set off a series of explosions in downtown LA as a smokescreen to distract the cops from their real goal ... to rob a bank ...


INT. DOC'S FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN - DUSK
Right out of Norman Rockwell.
Enough knickknacks and quaint furnishings
choke Martha Stewart.

Doc and Kelsey sit at the table
waiting for dinner to be served.

DOC
You do any more thinking
about going back to school?

KELSEY
Why the fuck would I do that?

DOC
Not having a diploma kinda limits
the kinda jobs you can get.

KELSEY
Not if I’m gonna be a heister.

DOC
A heister? Where on earth did you --

Doc’s wife JO (60) approaches the table
with a big tray of food.

Once a great beauty, now a bit faded,
but still tough, with the twinkling eyes
of a con artist. Which she was.

JO
Dinner’s served.

She sets it down. Sits.
Doc and Kelsey help themselves.

DOC
Thanks, honey. This looks great.

JO
So how was your day, Kelsey?

KELSEY
Okay, I guess.

DOC
Kelsey’s thinking about
taking up a life of crime.

JO
Is that so.

KELSEY
If it’s good enough for Griff and
Chelle --

DOC
Now where did you get that idea?
Your parents are in sales.

KELSEY
(snorts)
Yeah, GUN sales.

EXT. DOWNTOWN CITY STREET - DUSK
The armored car stops at a red light.

EXT. AERIAL VIEW OF LOS ANGELES - DUSK
All the lights in the city SHUT OFF.

INT. ARMORED CAR - DUSK
Zvi looks up from his laptop.
Smiles eagerly.

ZVI
Let there be DARK.

IN THE FRONT
Griff looks out the window.
Sees the lights are out.

GRIFF
(into his headset)
Copy that, Eagle.
(to Gino)
Better get a move on.
Traffic’s about to clusterfuck.

Gino nods. STEPS on it.
They LURCH into the intersection.

IN THE BACK
Chelle nods at Zvi.

CHELLE
Commence phases two, three and four.

ZVI
Rockets red glare, coming right up.

His fingers start FLYING across the keyboard.

EXT. UNION STATION - DUSK
A giant EXPLOSION on the front lawn.
A GIANT CLOUD OF BLACK SMOKE
envelopes the building.
Pedestrians RUN, screaming.

INT. UNION STATION - CONTINUOUS
People inside SCREAM. DUCK for cover.

INT. POLICE HEADQUARTERS - DUSK
Complete bedlam. Officers answer phones.
Work computers.

Trying to get control
of the situation.

FRONT DESK OFFICER
(on the phone)
I don’t KNOW if it’s connected.
Just send units to Union Station, NOW.

IN THE ARMORED CAR
Zvi looks at Chelle. Gives a thumbs up.

ZVI
Go Metro GONE.

EXT. CITY HALL - DUSK
An enormous EXPLOSION rocks
the front of the building.

A GIANT CLOUD OF BLACK SMOKE
starts enveloping the area.

ZVI (O.C.)
Just fought City Hall --

EXT. STAPLES CENTER - DUSK
A HUGE EXPLOSION rocks the front
of the building with a
GIANT CLOUD OF BLACK SMOKE.
Pedestrians RUN and SCREAM.

ZVI (O.C.)
Swish.

IN THE ARMORED CAR
Zvi looks at Chelle. Smiles.

ZVI
We have a trifecta.

EXT. DOWNTOWN LOS ANGELES - CITY STREET - NIGHT
There’s a RIOT going on. Complete mayhem.
LOOTERS smash windows.

RUN down the street with stolen goods.
A GANG-BANGER throws a MOLOTOV COCKTAIL
at a police car. It EXPLODES.

EXT. CITY STREET - NIGHT
The armored car turns a corner.

IN THE ARMORED CAR
Griff speaks into his headset.

GRIFF
Eagle, this is Houston.
Prepare for impact. Over.

IN THE REAR
Chelle nods. Speaks into her headset.

CHELLE
Copy that. Over.
(to the rest)
Buckle up. It’s gonna be a bumpy heist.

Everyone SNAPS on shoulder harnesses
that crisscross their torsos.

Pull their caps down over their faces
until they become ski masks.
One by one, they give a thumbs up.

EXT. BANK - NIGHT
The First National Bank of California.
A beautiful building.

Facade is two stories of
shiny glass and mirrors.

EXT. CITY STREET - NIGHT
The armored car pulls up in front of the bank,
looks like it’s going to park,
but instead makes a turn, BUMPS over the curb --
ACCELERATES -- and starts HEADING RIGHT TOWARD IT.

IN THE FRONT
Gino and Griff slip on MOTORCYCLE HELMETS.

IN THE BACK
Everyone BRACES for the impact.

EXT. BANK - NIGHT
The armored car reaches the facade, and --
IN SLOW MOTION -- CRASHES THROUGH with a BANG.
Glass and debris go FLYING.

INT. BANK - NIGHT
BANK CUSTOMERS RUN for cover. SCREAM.
The armored car stops.

The doors FLY OPEN.
Everyone PILES OUT.
Gripping automatic weapons.

Griff blasts a SPRAY OF BULLETS
at the ceiling.

GRIFF
This is a ROBBERY.
Do WHAT WE SAY -- and NOBODY GETS HURT.
(looks around)
Got it?

Everyone nods, terrified.
Chelle spins around in a slow circle,
aiming her Uzi at them.

CHELLE
Everyone down on the ground, NOW.

ZVI
Sits down at a loan officer’s desk.
Flips open his laptop.

The emergency generator kicks in.
The lights TURN ON --

ZVI
That didn’t take TOO long.
(fingers work the keyboard)
Sorry, Charlie. Only the real tuna
gets to be star-fucked.

And the power SHUTS DOWN.

ATLAS
Approaches the teller windows,
pointing his Uzi with one hand.

Duffle bag in the other.
Evil smile behind the mask.

He THROWS the bag at a
SCARED SHITLESS FEMALE TELLER.

ATLAS
No tricks, no dye-packs,
or you’ll DIE. GOT IT?
(of her terrified nod)
In the bag there’s more bags.
Give ‘em to the other tellers --
and start EMPTYING THE DRAWERS.

GRIFF
Waves his Uzi across everyone on the floor.

GRIFF
Which one of you is the manager?

A SHORT GUY WEARING A SUIT AND GLASSES
raises his hand.

SHORT GUY IN SUIT AND GLASSES
I am.

GRIFF
Let’s go take a trip to the vault --

Magic Hour

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Monday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 1 of BABY HEISTER, we meet 18-year-old gorgeous tomboy Kelsey Hazard, who's floating on an inner tube on a lake reading a crime novel and smoking a joint. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to her, her parents Griff and Chelle are about to rob a bank ...


EXT. RANCH - DUSK
It’s magic hour in the desert.
The mid-summer heat shimmers
in rippling waves in the air.
The crops. The blacktop road.

A small ranch in a green valley.
Giant mountains behind it.
Can you say incredible view?

Old, Spanish mission style house.
Big barn. Rustic pickup truck
parked in the drive.

In the distance, a deep blue lake
glows in the fading light.

It’s picture-postcard time, folks.
Doesn’t get much more gorgeous
and idyllic than this.

EXT. LAKE - DUSK
A young WOMAN (18) lies on
an inner tube reading a book,
lazily floating on the water.

She takes a hit from a joint.
Holds it in. EXHALES.
Turns the page. Riveted.

Meet KELSEY HAZARD, tomboy deluxe.
Pretty, but she’s done everything
she can to hide it.

Her long, sleek black hair
tied tight in a ponytail.
Baseball cap. Shades. Bare lips.

The problem is the tiny bikini
she’s almost wearing.

Her killer figure undulates
around her tall, lean frame. Ouch.

A TALL, OLDER GUY (60) walks out
on the rickety wooden pier.

Meet DOC HAZARD, her grandfather.
Looks like your typical old cowboy.

Except for the Grateful Dead
T-shirt and biker boots.

DOC
Supper’s almost ready.

KELSEY
(eyes on the book)
Be right there.
Just let me finish this chapter.

DOC
(under his breath)
Goddamn crime novels.
If she’d only be as interested
in her school books --

EXT. LOS ANGELES - TEN FREEWAY - DUSK
Clogged with rush hour traffic
heading west toward the beach.

But not so much heading east
into downtown LA.

We see an ARMORED CAR heading
that way in sparse traffic.

It reaches an off ramp, turns,
then starts descending into
the dirty City of Angels.

INT. ARMORED CAR - DUSK
Behind the wheel sits GINO CONTI (30’s).
Wiry. Dark-haired. Dark-skinned.

He smiles, chewing on a toothpick.
Turns and looks at the
HULKING BRUTE sitting
in the passenger seat.

GINO
Look at that sky. Beautiful.
In the cinema they call it
'magic hour.'

GUY
In my book,
they call it 'money hour.'

Meet GRIFF HAZARD (40),
heister extraordinaire.

Built like a block of granite.
Face like a potato.

Eyes burning with purpose. Intense.
Mouth a cruel dark slash.

GINO
You wrote book?
What is it about?

Griff stares ahead. Silent.
Watching the road.

IN THE REAR COMPARTMENT
Sits CHELLE HAZARD (39), Griff’s wife.
A gorgeous brunette.

Curvy goblet of sin poured
into a leather catsuit.

Armed to the gills. Packing, too.
She speaks into a headset.

CHELLE
Come in, Houston.
This is The Eagle.
Are we cleared for landing?
Over.

GRIFF’S
Eyes flicker.
Approach a smile.
Don’t quite make it.

GRIFF
(into his headset)
This is Houston.
Approaching our target in --
(looks at his watch)
T-minus two minutes. Over.

CHELLE
Smiles grimly. Nods.

CHELLE
Copy that, Houston. Over.

Sitting to her left is HELMUT WOLF (40’s),
expert marksman, German expat.
Dolph Lundgren, without the looks.

HELMUT
I still don’t like space travel names.
Is too silly.

CHELLE
That’s funny. I don’t remember
asking your opinion.

Sitting to her right is ATLAS DEMO (30’s),
medium-height, barrel-chested.
Jet-black hair.
Third generation Greek.

ATLAS
Don’t listen to him.
It’s fucking genius.
Anybody hears us,
they don’t know what the fuck
we’re talking about.

ZVI ROZEN (20’s), Israeli computer
hacker extraordinaire.

Hunched over an old-school
briefcase-sized laptop. Looks up.

ZVI
(to Helmut)
You just have chip on shoulder
because you came in job late
because someone dropped out.
You should be GRATEFUL,
not ruining vibe.

CHELLE
Enough bickering.
We need to work as a team,
GOT IT?

Helmut and Zvi glare at each other.
Reluctantly nod.

Zvi returns to his laptop.
Starts briskly typing out commands.

CHELLE
(to Zvi)
All set with the power grid?

ZVI
(smiles, gives a thumbs-up)
Like taking electricity from a baby --

Only Women Bleed

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Friday. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In the final chapter of THE DISH, it's a fight to the death when Jett returns to the sleazy motel room, only to discover Haven angrily burning the cash in the fireplace ... while they get surrounded by the cops ...


INT. MOTOR COURT - BUNGALOW - MOMENTS LATER
Haven sits on the floor in front
of the fireplace in bra and panties.
Laughing. Crying. Makeup smeared. Hair a mess.

She’s THROWING fistfuls
of money into the flames.

Jett walks in.
Puts down the bag. Sees Haven.

JETT
What are you DOING?

Haven ignores her.
Tosses in another handful of bills.

JETT
(races over)
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?

Jett tries to grab money
out of the flames, GETS BURNED.

JETT
OW, FUCK!

HAVEN
Careful, it’s hot.

Jett SLAPS Haven.
She looks at Jett, wild-eyed. Grimacing.

HAVEN
Your BOYFRIEND came to visit
while you were gone.

JETT
My boyfriend? What boyfriend?
I don’t have a fucking BOYFRIEND.
(small voice)
I’ve got -- you.

HAVEN
Rush? Rush Madder?
The one you said you took care of?

JETT
I did! I knocked him out
and threw him in the ocean!

HAVEN
Well, he must have swum to shore,
because he was just here.
(nasty)
And I gave him his cut.

JETT
HIS CUT?

HAVEN
He said a lot of interesting stuff.
Told me a lot of stories
about the two of you.
How you were dating back
home in Kansas, dealing drugs.
How he tried to rape a customer
while tweaked out on meth, a COP,
and how you killed the guy.
And then the pair of you split
for sunny California.

JETT
That was over a LONG time ago.

HAVEN
That’s not what RUSH said.

JETT
WHAT?

HAVEN
He said the two of you were gonna
bump me off and split with the money.

JETT
HE’S LYING. Haven, don’t you see --
he was making that up. I love YOU.

HAVEN
Then he saw the money, got greedy
and took half of it and split.
(slow, dreamy)
So I said fuck it.
There’s nothing left to live for.
So I started burning the rest of the money,
and now we BOTH have nothing.

She starts LAUGHING MANIACALLY.

JETT
Haven, he was LYING. He was --

Haven pulls out Jett’s REVOLVER.
Aims it at her.

HAVEN
Look what I found.

JETT
Haven. Put the gun down. Give it to me.

HAVEN
SHUT THE FUCK UP!

And she SHOOTS, wildly.
A bullet HITS Jett in the stomach.

JETT
HAVEN. You --

Jett looks down. A small red stain
appears on her white shirt.
Starts slowly growing.

JETT
SHOT me.

HAVEN
I thought we could be like Romeo and Juliet.
A tragic love story.

She pulls out Jett’s coke snifter. Does a bump.

HAVEN
Man, that’s good shit.
My mind has been RACING
thinking about what we could do.
Thought maybe we could set fire
to the cabin and go out in flames.
That would be dramatic, huh?
Right out of a movie.

Jett sits down next to Haven on the floor.
But she’s off somewhere, looking into the fire.

JETT
I love you, Haven. Listen to me.
He was LYING, you gotta BELIEVE ME.

But Haven is in her own little world.
Jett reaches over and tries to GRAB
the gun out of her hand. She SCREAMS.

HAVEN
NO!
They wrestle for control, Jett now weaker,
Haven on fire, almost an equal match.

The gun GOES OFF, BANG. A window SHATTERS.
Another BLAST. The TV set EXPLODES. A third, BANG.

HAVEN
Ow.

Haven SLUMPS over. Shot in the heart.

JETT
HAVEN! NO!

Jett freaks. GRABS Haven in her arms.
Holds on for dear life.

JETT
Baby, it’s gonna be okay, it’s gonna be okay.

HAVEN
(a whisper)
You -- shot me.

JETT
I didn’t mean to. I was -- just --

A siren WHOOP-WHOOPS outside.

Haven looks. She’s starting to slip away.
Eyelids heavy.

HAVEN
Looks like we have -- company.

Her flame flickers out. Gone.

JETT
Haven, NO -- baby -- NO, NO, NO, NO!

An ANGRY MALE VOICE comes over a bullhorn.

ANGRY MALE VOICE (O.C.)
Haven Crayce and Jett Targo,
this is the POLICE!
We have you SURROUNDED!
Come out RIGHT NOW
with your HANDS IN THE AIR!

Jett starts crying.
Puts the gun in her mouth.

Closes her eyes.
But she can’t do it.

ANGRY MALE VOICE (O.C.)
This is your LAST CHANCE!
We have you SURROUNDED!
If you don’t come out right NOW,
we’re coming in AFTER you!

Jett goes to the window. Sees --

EXT. MOTOR COURT PARKING LOT - CONTINUOUS
A dozen SQUAD CARS. Lights blaring.
Dozens of COPS, SWAT, with hand guns,
assault rifles, automatic weapons.

Half a dozen media trucks.
REPORTERS. CREW. ONLOOKERS.

JETT
pulls away from the window. Holds her wound.
Looks around the room. Sees a GAS CAN.
Raises THE gun. Takes aim --

JETT
I’m so sorry, baby.
It was gonna be so good. We had it all.

And SHOOTS it. It EXPLODES in a massive fireball.
Burning money FLIES around in the air.

ANGRY MALE VOICE (O.C.)
COMMENCE FIRING!

The windows EXPLODE with bullets.
Shots BANG-BANG-BANG,
blasting HOLES in the walls.

Jett gets SHOT. She hits the floor, dying.
Looks at Haven. Flames licking at her body.
The peaceful look on her face.

JETT
But sometimes -- it just doesn’t work out.

EXT. MOTOR COURT BUNGALOW - CONTINUOUS
Everyone watches the house EXPLODE
in a BALL OF FLAMES.

CAL SEELY stands next to his car.
Shakes his head slowly.

DR. BING appears beside him.
They nod at each other.
Look back at the fire.

DR. BING
I never did trust that dame --

Deadly Is The Night

Happy Thursday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 44 of THE DISH, Jett leaves Haven in their beach dive motel and goes to the nearby convenience store to get supplies, but doesn't see her picture on a wanted poster ... or that the clerk recognizes her ...


INT. CONVENIENCE STORE - NIGHT
The Wanted poster is up.
But now Haven has a mustache
and a missing front tooth.

And Jett is in shades
and a cowboy hat.

Like she is right now.
Walking in the door.
The bell RINGS.

JETT
(tips her hat)
Evenin.’

She grabs a basket.
Starts going through
the food aisles.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
(wide-eyed)
Evenin.’

Jett goes to the beverage cooler.
Takes out a six-pack.
Brings her items to the counter.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
Looks like you’re fixing
to have yourself
a late-night snack.

JETT
Yeah.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
You must be stayin’ at
the Buccaneer down the way.

Jet nods.
Retarded rings up the items.

Open-mouthed. Concentrating.
Placing each in a paper bag.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
That’ll be -- thirty-four dollars
and seventy-three cents, please.
Jett hands him some cash.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
Out of forty --
(hands her bills and coins)
Five dollars and twenty-seven
cents is your change.

Jett tosses the coins in a
big plastic cup marked TIPS.

JETT
(picks up the bag)
Thanks. Have a good night.

She heads toward the door.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
You, too.
(after she’s out the door)
Give my best to your friend.

Retarded goes to the phone.
Dials. Listens.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
I’d like to speak
with the Sheriff, please.
This is Lonnie down at
the Stop and Gulp?
(listens)
I wanna report that
Bonnie and Bride
are holed up at the
Buccaneer Motor Court
over here in Seal Beach.
(listens)
So when do I get
that reward money?

PUSH IN ON Retarded.
Doing his duty. Excited.

Kiss Me Deadly

Hey there, crime kids. Happy Hump Day. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where your most violent fantasies become sins of the flesh, right here, where the hardboiled action is non-stop, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 43 of THE DISH, a cop posts a wanted poster for Haven and Jett in the convenience store right near the motel they're holed up in ... just as Jett leaves to go to the store ...


EXT. CONVENIENCE STORE - AT THAT MOMENT
A ramshackle joint a stone’s throw
from the motor court.

The COUNTY SHERIFF’S POLICE CRUISER
s parked outside.

INT. CONVENIENCE STORE - CONTINUOUS
A STRANGE-LOOKING DEPUTY
hands a wanted poster to the CLERK,
a mildly retarded local kid (18).
The clerk looks at it.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
I saw them -- on the news.

STRANGE-LOOKING DEPUTY
Yep. Bonnie and Bride.
Shore would like to get in
the middle of THAT sandwich.

Retarded stares at the poster.
Strange-looking goes to
the frozen food section.

Rummages around. Finds something.
Returns to the register.

STRANGE-LOOKING DEPUTY
How much for the Hot Pockets?

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
On the house, chief.

STRANGE-LOOKING DEPUTY
(goes to the door)
Mighty obliged, son.
You take care now.

MILDLY RETARDED CLERK
(watching him go)
I love Hot Pockets.

Retarded puts the wanted poster
on the counter.

Takes out a black marker.
Starts drawing on it.

INT. SHITTY BUNGALOW - LIVING ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
A ROARING FIRE in the fireplace.
The wood CRACKS in the
red and orange flames
flickering over the money.

Haven and Jett lie
in each other’s arms,
basking in the heat.

HAVEN
I wanna stay here
forever and ever.

JETT
Yeah.

HAVEN
Mmmm.
(beat)
I’m hungry.

JETT
So am I.

HAVEN
Would you go get us some provisions?
Pretty please?

JETT
Of course.

Jett gets up, puts on her cowboy hat.

HAVEN
I think you should go just like that.

Shrugs into her jeans.

JETT
Silly girl, it’s fuckin’
freezing out there.

Puts on her shirt. SNAPS it.

HAVEN
Hurry back, honey pie.
I’m so hungry,
I could eat a horse.

JETT
When I come back,
we’ll do some ropin’ and ridin.’
(goes to the door)
Keep the home fires burning.

HAVEN
(smiles, dreamy)
Yeah --
(beat)
Hey, you know what?

JETT
What.

HAVEN
You know when they say
money can’t buy happiness?
(beat)
They’re full of shit.

And she THROWS a fistful
of money in the air.

PUSH IN ON Haven’s eyes.
Dancing with delight.

Lonely Is The Night

Happy Tuesday, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 42 of THE DISH, murderous lesbian fugitives Haven and Jett check into a sleazy dive beach motel to hide out ... and then things get more than a little hot and heavy when Haven takes off her clothes and rolls around in a big pile of cash ...


INT. MOTOR COURT OFFICE - NIGHT
A plump BUCK-TOOTHED WOMAN
sits at the desk reading
a true crime magazine. Riveted.
Slowly eating potato chips.

Jett comes in quietly.
Closes the door behind her.

JETT
Evenin’. Mighty cold out there.

BUCK-TOOTH
It’s the fog.
Cold and wet it is.

She smiles strangely.
This bulb is definitely low-wattage.

JETT
Can I get a cabin for the night?

BUCK-TOOTH
Sure thing. Got one left.
But the heater’s broke.
Got a fireplace, though.

JETT
How much?

BUCK-TOOTH
(hands her a key)
Fifty bucks.
Check out is at eleven.

JETT
(takes it)
Mighty obliged.

BUCK-TOOTH
How can you see in those shades?
It’s night-time, mister.

PUSH IN ON Jett. Delighted.

INT. SHITTY BUNGALOW - LIVING ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
Quaint and cute.
Forty years ago.

Now, musty and well-worn.
Wooden furniture. Ancient TV.

An overstuffed couch
facing a stone fireplace.

Typical shitty paintings
of ships at sea.

Haven walks in,
hefting a large briefcase,
followed by Jett,
carrying their luggage.

HAVEN
Who knew eight-hundred grand
was so HEAVY.

Jett drops the luggage with a BANG.

JETT
I thought I told you to pack light.

She goes to the fireplace.
Gets a fire going.

HAVEN
Hey, a girl’s gotta have
a change of outfits.
Don’t you want me
to look sexy for you?

Jett walks over to her.
Kisses her.

JETT
You’d look good in a burlap bag.

HAVEN
You know what I wanna do?

JETT
What.

HAVEN
Roll around in it.

JETT
Roll around in what?

Haven goes to the briefcase. Opens it.

HAVEN
The money. I wanna feel it on my skin.

She takes out a bundle.
RIPS off the tape.
THROWS it in air.

It flutters down like confetti.
Haven SQUEALS with joy.

JETT
You think you should do that?
What if somebody comes by?

HAVEN
No one’s coming.
We’re all alone, and it’s late.
C’mon, it’s FUN.

Haven takes out two more.
RIPS them open. TOSSES them.

HAVEN
Wheeeeee!

She twirls in the fluttering bills
like a dancer.

Jett stares. Takes some money.
RIPS it open. THROWS it.

They both start LAUGHING MADLY.
A storm of cash RAINS down on them.
Haven stops. SHRIEKS --

And strips off her dress.
Glorious in lingerie and heels.

The vixen gets down on the carpet
and ROLLS AROUND in it.
Jett showers her with more cash.

HAVEN
Fuck me, BEN FRANKLIN.

Jett takes off her boots.
Her jeans.

Then joins Haven on the
money-covered rug
in front of the roaring fire.

HAVEN
We made it, baby.
There’s nobody else in the world.

JETT
And you’re mine. All mine.
(beat)
There’s nobody else.

And they start making love,
like animals.

Jett BITES Haven’s throat.
She CRIES OUT.

Bonnie & Bride

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In Chapter 41 of THE DISH, the cops start closing in on finding Haven and Jett's location. Meanwhile, the murderous renegade lesbians hole up for the night in a dive motel on the coast ...


EXT. COUNTY ROAD - NIGHT
The truck ROARS down the gravel road.

HAVEN
You see the look on his face?
He just died and went
to trailer trash heaven.
He’s probably jerking off
in it right now.

JETT
I think we should hole up
somewhere for the night.
I’d rather cross the border
in the morning, when there’s
more traffic.

HAVEN
Ooh. I love the sound of 'holing up.'

EXT. COUNTY ROAD - CONTINUOUS
The pickup FLIES down the road.
Behind them, a DODGE DART SWINGER
pulls out of the bushes,
and ROARS after them.

INT. SHERIFF’S MUSTER ROOM - AT THAT MOMENT
Your typical shitty institutional
municipal squad room.

Cal Seely stands at a lectern
in front of a dozen UNIFORMED OFFICERS
and a handful of PLAINCLOTHES DETECTIVES.

CAL
We’ve put out an APB.
All regional airports, bus stations
and trains are being watched.
The highway patrol is on it.
And we’ve alerted the media,
who is calling them 'Bonnie and Bride.'

A smattering of chuckling.

CAL
This isn’t a fucking JOKE.
We need to FIND them,
and find them NOW.
This is front page news, people.
I want you to fucking
take apart that whore’s boat,
and that fucking dyke’s apartment --
and find out where the fuck
they’ve gone.
(beat)
Do I make myself clear?

EXT. MOTOR COURT - NIGHT
A foghorn BLEATS somewhere off the coast.
A dense FOG has rolled in from the ocean.

Lights look blurry, fuzzy.
There’s a sharp, damp,
pungent chill in the air over --

THE BUCCANEER.
A small motor court motel
across the street from the beach.

A deserted area far away
from the touristy crap.

A small semi-circle of
shitty bungalows face the water.

The middle one has a sign
that reads OFFICE. VACANCY.

Jett’s pickup pulls up
behind it and stops.

INT. PICKUP TRUCK - CONTINUOUS
Jett shuts off the ignition.
Slips on a cowboy hat. Shades.

HAVEN
I like the hat.
Makes you look -- rugged.

JETT
Let me check in by myself.
You’re too -- memorable.

HAVEN
That sounds like a
line from something.

JETT
From our life, baby face --