Friday, May 31, 2019

Cheerleaders On Fire


Happy Fridaze, crime slicksters. It's time once again to take a trip to the dark side, where the girls are hot, the drinks are cold, and the hardboiled-pulp-noir action is non-stop, right here, at the coolest crime joint in cyberspace ... at That Killing Feeling.

In Chapter 2 of Frankenstein In Love, teenage science nerd Frankie is accosted by his lovelorn next-door-neighbor Vita about playing Dungeons and Dragons later that night. In a hurry to go to school, he blows her off. Later at school, he sees his dream girl, head cheerleader Shayla ... who laughs in his face.



EXT. FRANKIE’S HOUSE - DAY
A small, plain four-bedroom colonial job
just like all the others on the street.

Frankie walks out the front door.
Starts walking over to his car,
a decrepit, old Volkswagon bus.
Fumbles with his keys.

FEMALE VOICE (O.C.)
Hey, Frankie.

He turns and look, sees --

VITA HECK (17), his next-door neighbor.
Dressed in black. Rail-thin.

Pale skin. Dark makeup. Wild hair.
Siouxsie Sioux has nothing on her.

FRANKIE
Hey, Vita. What’s up?

VITA
Finally fixed the motherboard.
Got two-hundred screaming gigs of power.

FRANKIE
(distracted)
That’s -- great.

He opens the car door.
Gets in. Starts the engine.
Vita walks over to the car.

VITA
A bunch of us are gonna play
Dungeons and Dragons tonight.
Can I pencil you in as the wizard?

FRANKIE
I haven’t played that
since we were kids.

VITA
I know, but hope springs eternal.
Play your cards right, and I’ll
let you loot and pillage.

FRANKIE
I’m sorry, Vita. I gotta go.
Don’t wanna be late for school. Sorry.

He drives away.
She SHOUTS after him.

VITA
I’ll let you be dungeon master --

EXT. SUBURBAN HIGH SCHOOL - DAY
Out of a John Hughes movie.
Old and stately. Manicured lawn.
Manicured kids from good homes.

The joint’s abuzz with dozens of
STUDENTS on their way to class.

Frankie walks with his friend
JOSH BOHNER (17), small and intense.
Makes Christopher Mintz-Platz look macho.

JOSH
You mean it WORKED?

FRANKIE
Yeah. I tweaked the enzyme,
stripped the double helix,
swapped out the nucleiods,
then zapped it with ten thousand watts.

JOSH
That’s amazing.
Do you realize what this MEANS?

FRANKIE
That I’m a genius?

JOSH
Yeah. You’re gonna be rich and famous.
(sees something)
Uh-oh. Here come the archetypes.

A trio of CHEERLEADERS
glide by the boys.

Three scoops of blonde
bathed in golden sunlight.

Frankie sighs. Stares at --

SHAYLA PETRIE (17),
the head cheerleader.

She sees Frankie staring.
Whispers to her friends.
They ERUPT in laughter.

FRANKIE
(whispers)
Shayla Petrie.

JOSH
I can’t believe you
have the hots for her.
She just laughed in your face.

FRANKIE
I don’t care. She’s perfect.

JOSH
Hello? Reality check?
She’s WAY out of your league.
(tugs on his sleeve)
C’mon, we’re gonna be late for chem lab.

They start walking inside.

FRANKIE
I would KILL to be with her.

JOSH
Careful what you wish for.

SITTING UNDER A NEARBY TREE
We see Vita, watching them.
Writing something in a notebook.

CLOSE ON --

The book.

We see a drawing of
CHEERLEADERS ON FIRE.

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